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So, I was just giving my new I&E tech his 30 day review. Didn't go well.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, December 03, 2012, 05:32:24 PM

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The Good Reverend Roger

Hello, William, come in and sit down. 

How are you settling in?  Good, good.  I've been reviewing your progress so far, and I have to say that you're doing a fantastic job.  Your skills with 3 phase power, PLCs, and instrumentation are as advertised, and you're picking up combustion at a rate that doesn't surprise me, given your relatively young age vs the skills you already have.

The one issue we have here is your behavior.  You sort of stand out.  I see a lack of fits of rage and hopeless despair.  I also don't see any signs of serious mental illness.  I wouldn't worry about that too much, as you're new to the company and to Arizona.  It will come to you, as it came to me and everyone else here.

You see, I think that God sent you to keep me company here in the afterlife, so I wouldn't be so lonely.  I have to eat quite a lot of pills, you see, and as a result, I don't communicate well with the others, who are on pills that are incompatible with the ones I take.  So normally, I just sit here and enjoy the sensation of my bones melting.

What's that?  Oh, yeah, that was probably disturbing as hell for you.  You can take it up with my boss if you find it that disquieting...But be advised that he's in worse shape than I am.  Sometimes he forgets how to speak in actual sentences, and just sort of sits there making this high-pitched keening noise.  When you have spend enough time in this refinery, this city, and this state, you'll cease to be disturbed by this sort of thing, and maybe you'll even do some disturbing of your own.

So, great.  We'll have another chat in 30 more days, and another one after a total of 90 days on the job, when we consider hiring you on as a permanent employee.  And stop staring at me...This is the ONLY job left in Tucson, so you're just going to have to adjust.

Welcome to the industrial chemicals industry, William, you're going to do just fine.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on December 03, 2012, 05:40:02 PM
Please tell me this actually happened :lol:

Of course it did.  I have to shock them at first, to get them used to their new place in the universe.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Don Coyote

if I had a boss tell me that, I would be forced to work there forever.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: American Jackal on December 03, 2012, 06:02:14 PM
if I had a boss tell me that, I would be forced to work there forever.

Well, that's the case anyway, at least here.  People CAN leave, but it never ends well.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Epimetheus

Roger, I think I know why you attract all the weirdos.
There's the Earth's magnetic field. Comes out at the south end, goes in at the north end, roughly speaking.
Then there's the Luck field. Comes out in Peru and goes in at Dobbstown.

But I think there's another field, a Weird field. And, methinks, it comes out somewhere in the Indian Ocean, and goes in right down atop your big ol' bald flocculent head.


Here's hoping a future boss or associate of mine creates half as much a disturbance in the Weird as you.
POST-SINGULARITY POCKET ORGASM TOAD OF RIGHTEOUSNESS

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: chimes on December 03, 2012, 06:41:49 PM
Roger, I think I know why you attract all the weirdos.
There's the Earth's magnetic field. Comes out at the south end, goes in at the north end, roughly speaking.
Then there's the Luck field. Comes out in Peru and goes in at Dobbstown.

But I think there's another field, a Weird field. And, methinks, it comes out somewhere in the Indian Ocean, and goes in right down atop your big ol' bald flocculent head.


Here's hoping a future boss or associate of mine creates half as much a disturbance in the Weird as you.

Well, I think the field started HERE and ended at my head, and since I'm now here, the field is shorted and I get ALL the weird.  Except for Portland, which HAS weird, just not the kind of weird they THINK they have, by which I mean the kind of weird they BRAG about.

Instead, they have the kind of weird that makes everyone else at the party try to edge away to another conversation, except they're all doing it AND having it done to them at the same time.

And then there's Providence, which is kinda weird, in that nobody has any situational awareness at all, because Richter hogged it all up.  Leln doesn't NEED any, because she usually IS the situation.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 03, 2012, 05:32:24 PM
Hello, William, come in and sit down. 

How are you settling in?  Good, good.  I've been reviewing your progress so far, and I have to say that you're doing a fantastic job.  Your skills with 3 phase power, PLCs, and instrumentation are as advertised, and you're picking up combustion at a rate that doesn't surprise me, given your relatively young age vs the skills you already have.

The one issue we have here is your behavior.  You sort of stand out.  I see a lack of fits of rage and hopeless despair.  I also don't see any signs of serious mental illness.  I wouldn't worry about that too much, as you're new to the company and to Arizona.  It will come to you, as it came to me and everyone else here.

You see, I think that God sent you to keep me company here in the afterlife, so I wouldn't be so lonely.  I have to eat quite a lot of pills, you see, and as a result, I don't communicate well with the others, who are on pills that are incompatible with the ones I take.  So normally, I just sit here and enjoy the sensation of my bones melting.

What's that?  Oh, yeah, that was probably disturbing as hell for you.  You can take it up with my boss if you find it that disquieting...But be advised that he's in worse shape than I am.  Sometimes he forgets how to speak in actual sentences, and just sort of sits there making this high-pitched keening noise.  When you have spend enough time in this refinery, this city, and this state, you'll cease to be disturbed by this sort of thing, and maybe you'll even do some disturbing of your own.

So, great.  We'll have another chat in 30 more days, and another one after a total of 90 days on the job, when we consider hiring you on as a permanent employee.  And stop staring at me...This is the ONLY job left in Tucson, so you're just going to have to adjust.

Welcome to the industrial chemicals industry, William, you're going to do just fine.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:

And on that note, I think I'm ready for bed.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Suu

You have to break it to them gently. Otherwise, they just can't take it when the weird hit them dead in the dome piece. He'll be on the right track in no time with Roger's guidance.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."