WHAD'YA GIT?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

They're still playing Christmas music.

So I picked the worst one and annotated it:

Have a holly jolly Christmas (I'd pimp my mother out for some way to make "jolly" rhyme.)
It's the best time of the year (for the store playing the song, anyway)
Well I don't know if there'll be snow (Global warming.  Enjoy your mud.)
But have a cup of cheer (Cheer = rum, of course)

Have a holly jolly Christmas 
And when you walk down the street (dodging the rather dodgy santas)
Say hello to friends you know (because you couldn't be arsed to the rest of the year)
And everyone you meet  (except those people walking¹)

Ho ho the mistletoe  (ho ho, it's fake, made by Chinese slave labor)
Hung where you can see (Who the fuck even knows what it looks like, anymore?)
Somebody waits for you
Kiss her once for me (Because we're creepy that way)

Have a holly jolly Christmas
And in case you didn't hear
Oh bygolly have a holly jolly Christmas
This year  (entire verse = I've been into the eggnog on top of my Xanax)

Have a holly jolly Christmas
And when you walk down the street
Say hello to friends you know
And everyone you meet (see above)

Have a holly jolly Christmas
And in case you didn't hear
Oh bygolly have a holly jolly Christmas
This year (Entire verse:  "or else")





¹  We're against that sort of thing, especially at Christmas.  Who wants their Christmas cheer ruined by seeing that sort of thing?

[Juana]

Macy's giftcard, Amazon gift card, nice leather purse, $80 in cash, a blood orange to replace the one Shoe Ears killed, and a giant jar of nutella.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

WHAD'YA GIT?

ANOTHER DAY OLDER AND DEEPER IN DEBT...

(I bet maybe 2 people here catch the reference without googling)

Nighthawks, Sixteen Tons. NO GOOLING REQUIRED, BUTTHOLES!

[Richter]

"Fall of the Roman empire", "How man fucked up trying to control nature", a horrible contraption from the 60's for sharpening things, and thumbscrews from mom and dad.

Cooking implements that would fuck the pope and a "Coat rack" that I could hang a whole hog on from my sister.

A pair of "You destroy them, we fix them NO QUESTIONS ASKED" socks from my aunt.


Mu Hu Ha Ha

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

WHAD'YA GIT?

ANOTHER DAY OLDER AND DEEPER IN DEBT...

(I bet maybe 2 people here catch the reference without googling)

I love that song. Have it on my computer. 16 tons, whad'ya git? Another day older and deeper in debt, St. Peter don't you call me cause I can't go, I owe my soul to the company store.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

WHAD'YA GIT?

ANOTHER DAY OLDER AND DEEPER IN DEBT...

(I bet maybe 2 people here catch the reference without googling)

Nighthawks, Sixteen Tons. NO GOOLING REQUIRED, BUTTHOLES!

Seemingly i only know the version from The Wire soundtrack.

I got a grey knit dress, some toiletries, £15 gift token for the posh department store chain where they will call me "madam" even when I look like a bum (for more yarn) £70 cash (probably going to spend it on yarn, and/or some new lingerie that fits in the sales at the specialist store in Edinburgh that will fit my ta-tas), a £100 winter military style winter coat (from Payne, it was desperately needed for surviving the winter) , and 1.6 kilos of yarn, in 2 balls that are bigger than my head. The yarn and the coat were my favourite gifts. Oh and a bottle of Merlot, and no more housemates, and plane tickets to Edinburgh (also from Payne).

[Cainad (dec.)]

"The Prankster and the Conspiracy" by Adam Gorightly, among other books.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

I got yarn, funny t-shirts, and chocolate. There's more yarn on the way.

[Deepthroat Chopra]

Mostly things that will keep me in the kitchen, mostly with Jamie Oliver's name on them, including casserole dish, roast dish, a book and various DVD's. I think I'll get some books for myself.

[Lenin McCarthy]

I got books, a Bible, a banjo, candy, thermal underwear and a bed of nails.

[Richter]

I got books, a Bible, a banjo, candy, thermal underwear and a bed of nails.

Play the banjo wearing the thermals while sitting on the bed of nails.  With a pharoh hat on.  Bill yourself as either Rameses or Nyarlathotep.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I got books, a Bible, a banjo, candy, thermal underwear and a bed of nails.

Was it at least a family Bible with pages for genealogy?

Twid,
Got a family Bible. Loves it, even though it's under read. I tend to prefer the one I got in CCD because it has translator notes and is rejected by conservative Catholics on grounds of it being too liberal.

[Dildo Argentino]

I got books, a Bible, a banjo, candy, thermal underwear and a bed of nails.

You lucky dog.

Some home-made chocolate bonbons and biscuits from my sister... promise of a pair of knit cycling leggings from my mum, almost finished... dad sent dosh from the UK as he does... I think I may have got a mug an'all. We generally celebrate giftmas, though, along with stuffyerselftodeathmas, it is a year-end occasion that is near the solstice and have I mentioned we eat a lot. My guts have taken some damage but will live to digest another day.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I got books, a Bible, a banjo, candy, thermal underwear and a bed of nails.

You lucky dog.

Some home-made chocolate bonbons and biscuits from my sister... promise of a pair of knit cycling leggings from my mum, almost finished... dad sent dosh from the UK as he does... I think I may have got a mug an'all. We generally celebrate giftmas, though, along with stuffyerselftodeathmas, it is a year-end occasion that is near the solstice and have I mentioned we eat a lot. My guts have taken some damage but will live to digest another day.

Dosh is good.

Stuffyerselftodeath is better.

Funny innit?

The immediate reward is better.

I don't care about all that giftiness, give me money!

I don't care about all that money feed me!

Like I said though, I got what I got. And I loved all of it. And I would have to say that my favorites were the socks and the dalek alarm clock. Even though I could get a decades worth of socks with the money.... meh. Socks and Daleks.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

And the Pyrex. Oh gods, the Pyrex....