You want to feel a little bit better about people?

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

LETTUCE AND TOMATO! 
GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, COMMUNIST!

[Suu]

We both sat there and stared at them for a few minutes. Speechless.

[LMNO]

AND SHITTY DRIVING!!

I'm fairly convinced that the problem isn't the people who actually live here, it's all the part-timers and 3-semester transplants who have no idea what they're doing.  True Boston drivers might seem erratic, but that's because they're convinced (usually correctly), that some clueless asshole (usually from Connecticut) is going to sideswipe them at any moment.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

On the topic of Yelp though. I've found great pleasure in praising the little known places I frequent. It's also very gratifying to tear something horrible apart.
Like so:

China Buffett 

Category: Chinese
1.0 star rating
Update - 2/13/2012
UPDATE:
YES!!! YES YEEEEEEEEESS!! The health department finally shut this giant turd farm down!

Listed in: Bunch of Meh.

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    1.0 star rating
    6/12/2010 First to Review

    Usually when I have to write a bad review I feel kind of like a jerk, but this time... no.
    I hope I'm able to finish this review before I keel over and die. Make sure to tell my family I love them.

    So after a night of fun what's better than going to a cheap chinese buffet and filling your upset stomach with glorious delectables from a greasy chinese joint? Well not much, unless you go here.
    I've been here many times and it seems each time I go it gets progressively worse.

    Upon entering you're greeted by a nice fish tank with some really pretty fish that, to my surprise, are not dead. How they manage to survive in these surroundings is beyond me. Super mutant fish from planet Herpes or something I guess.

    The hostess will take you to the stickiest table you've ever folded your arms across (and then quickly remove them as you recoil in horror) and take your drink order. I chose water and sprite. Seemingly safe.

    The food, excuse me, "food". I....
    As I walked over to the buffet I tried desperately not to look down at the carpet, and failed miserably. I thought to myself, ok, spills happen...
    I grabbed a nice bowl of white rice and chicken with chlamydia broccoli and had a seat. My poor friend who I dragged with me looked as if she were about to start crying and I think my husband lost consciousness  at this point. The rest of his meal was a blur and my friend choked back her tears and forced her food down her throat like a champ.
    The hot and sour soup wasn't so bad, but the ebola nuggets, hepatitis pork and AIDS rolls were not in any way edible or a source of food, nutrition, nourishment or even something you should touch without a hazmat suit.
    I think I contracted something here. Usually after leaving a buffet I feel like a heathenish glutton for whom the sin was made, but today, I feel like I need an antibiotic. My friend was lucky and as her stomach rejected it's contents I couldn't help but feel jealous, for all I could do was buckle over as my guts clenched in pain and remorse. This IS going to hurt later.

    Please if you have an ounce of self preservation do not eat at this medical waste recycling center. I mean, I know most buffets are dirty, but there is a point where it goes beyond comedy and into frightening horror. These immune system terrorists should seriously be considered for a close down. 
    But if you're looking for an adventure, an adrenaline rush, considering suicide or you have to go on a date with someone you REALLY REALLY don't like, then give it a shot. But don't say I didn't warn ya.

I have also thought of starting a troll account, but I haven't picked a personality yet.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

AND SHITTY DRIVING!!

I'm fairly convinced that the problem isn't the people who actually live here, it's all the part-timers and 3-semester transplants who have no idea what they're doing.  True Boston drivers might seem erratic, but that's because they're convinced (usually correctly), that some clueless asshole (usually from Connecticut) is going to sideswipe them at any moment.

Then how do you explain the people with Mass plates deliberately trying to kill me with their vehicles. You know, like when I was in the right hand lane with my signal on about to turn till this guy goes around me to the left and makes a right hand turn in front of me...
FUCKBALLS I HATE BOSTON

[LMNO]

Wait... Isn't that considered typical Florida driving?  They were just trying to make you feel at home.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Being a large federal nation we dont have a national dish unless you want to count apple pie. Instead we have regional dishes. In lmnos and my case it would be clam chowdah

No. The regional dish for Boston is Antagonism and Binge Drinking.

Oh good. Because i dont eat seafood. I felt like a bad bostonian.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

Wait... Isn't that considered typical Florida driving?  They were just trying to make you feel at home.

A Florida driver would NEVER use a turn signal.

[LMNO]

So, there you go!  They were considerate enough to tell you what their intentions were.  Such nice, kind-hearted people.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

Boston= the only place I've driven that nearly made me want to fucking cry.

I was happy as fuck to give that car back to the rental.




Fuck you, Boston. Fuck you.

[LMNO]

IT JUST MEANS YOU ARE WEAK, AND BOSTON WILL EAT YOU.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

I DON'T WANNA DIE IN BOSTON


they had a really good french fry place though.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

This is true. Boston is a testing ground. Its why i generally laugh at the winter misery of californians who come here for college.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Tell me more of this french fry place

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Funniest thing EVER is when Bostonians try to drive in Portland.

FUNNIEST THING EVER!