From the Desk of TGRR; Corporate Life in the 21st Century (blog)

[The Good Reverend Roger]

So, fired Ivan for blowing a .06 BAT at 8:15 in the morning, last Friday.  Monday, interviewed and hired Tiny Killer Neckbeard, our new programmer.  TKN is smaller even than Nigel (comes in at about .8 Standard Nigel Units), and is both a genius at microprocessor controls and has just left his college-paying career of teaching karate.  2nd degree black belt or some shit.

This means I now have a ninja on staff.  Muhaha.  Too small to show up on instruments, and able to kill us all with a single punch.

Don't you wish you were me?

Mike the Engineer is sticking his dick in the meat grinder known as "competition law", by allowing one vendor to submit multiple bids on the same project, so I'm not sure how much longer he'll be a problem.

Filthy Assistant has taken to wandering around in a confused state.  We have bets on when he'll actually shit himself.

Jim is doing a fairly good imitation of autism, though I think it's actually that he can't HEAR us talk due to the rage pounding at the inside of his skull. 

I think it's kind of funny - hilarious - that everyone here is going insane in one manner or another (except me, I'm FINE) due to the enormous stresses that we have been under for the last couple of years.  Not just the good stress (PLEASE INCREASE PRODUCTION BY A FACTOR OF 10 IN A YEAR, HERE'S A TON OF MONEY TO DO IT WITH), but also the WEIRD stuff.  Example:  We need to do exposure monitoring for chrome 6, etc.  We do not have an industrial hygenist.  They will not loan us one.  We have been denied the slot to hire one of our own, and this isn't a contract position type thing (it's full time).  Then we are asked where the results are.  My boss has threatened his boss with sending me to Houston to explain matters in language they'll understand.   After the bean counter thing and the South Carolina incident, that didn't go over well. 

Ed's arm is healing nicely, though I have talked to him about our company rules requiring that your skin must be worn at all times at the workplace.

There is a reason that The Good Reverend Roger is just a teensy bit stressed out these days, but fuck me if I know what it is.

[Suu]

I giggled.

Though it probably should have been more like this: 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I like the part where you need an industry hygienist but YOU AREN'T ALLOWED TO HAVE ONE. 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I like the part where you need an industry hygienist but YOU AREN'T ALLOWED TO HAVE ONE. 

This isn't a bad corporation, but it is a LARGE corporation, and we firmly believe that the left tentacle should never know what the right tentacle is doing.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

What *I* like is being treated as a strategic deterrent.

DO WE HAVE TO SEND ROGER AROUND TO EXPLAIN THIS?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I like the part where you need an industry hygienist but YOU AREN'T ALLOWED TO HAVE ONE. 

This isn't a bad corporation, but it is a LARGE corporation, and we firmly believe that the left tentacle should never know what the right tentacle is doing.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Also, my new way of describing the size of a person is Standard Nigel Units (SNUs).  I, for example, am about 2.4 SNUs. 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Also, my new way of describing the size of a person is Standard Nigel Units (SNUs).  I, for example, am about 2.4 SNUs.

I enjoyed that as well.

[LMNO]

I look forward to the ongoing reports regarding the adventures of TKN.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I look forward to the ongoing reports regarding the adventures of TKN.

He starts Monday, once his drug test and background check clear.  He'll be on the floor by Wednesday.

Well, in the office, anyway.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

So, Mike has managed to set a new high in diplomacy.  We're in a department meeting (5 mechanics, 3 electricians, representing a total of about 250 years of experience), to which he has elected to invite himself.

Roger:  And the contractors will be doing the next ball mill start to finish.

Mike:  Wait a minute.  You guys are going to add the media, right?  (NOTE:  The media is a few dozen metric tons of ceramic balls.  It's nasty, grueling work.  Cut bag, dump bag, for about 12 hours).

Roger:  No.  The contractors have been hired by you to INSTALL THE MILL.  That means THE WHOLE THING.

Mike:  (in front of my guys):  But that's not really skilled work.  Your guys can do it.

At this point, the meeting descends into chaos, with all my guys making retard noises and waving their arms around.  Mike becomes offended, and tells me they're insubordinate.  I tell him he's an asshole.  He leaves and tells Jim.  Jim asks my guys.  Nobody remembers a thing.  Mike is now sitting in his office, screaming at anyone who tries to talk to him.

[Reginald Ret]

What *I* like is being treated as a strategic deterrent.

DO WE HAVE TO SEND ROGER AROUND TO EXPLAIN THIS?

THAT is what I aspire to be in a decade (if I still work here, *shudder*).

[The Good Reverend Roger]

You know, I respect education.  I really do.

But to assume that 30 year veterans of the trades are "stupid" or "unskilled" because they don't have a college degree is the sort of thing that causes people to sneer at "college boys".

Especially engineers.  Especially engineers that don't know how to use a multimeter.

[Reginald Ret]

So, Mike has managed to set a new high in diplomacy.  We're in a department meeting (5 mechanics, 3 electricians, representing a total of about 250 years of experience), to which he has elected to invite himself.

Roger:  And the contractors will be doing the next ball mill start to finish.

Mike:  Wait a minute.  You guys are going to add the media, right?  (NOTE:  The media is a few dozen metric tons of ceramic balls.  It's nasty, grueling work.  Cut bag, dump bag, for about 12 hours).

Roger:  No.  The contractors have been hired by you to INSTALL THE MILL.  That means THE WHOLE THING.

Mike:  (in front of my guys):  But that's not really skilled work.  Your guys can do it.

At this point, the meeting descends into chaos, with all my guys making retard noises and waving their arms around.  Mike becomes offended, and tells me they're insubordinate.  I tell him he's an asshole.  He leaves and tells Jim.  Jim asks my guys.  Nobody remembers a thing.  Mike is now sitting in his office, screaming at anyone who tries to talk to him.

Isn't that what minimum wage temps are for?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

So, Mike has managed to set a new high in diplomacy.  We're in a department meeting (5 mechanics, 3 electricians, representing a total of about 250 years of experience), to which he has elected to invite himself.

Roger:  And the contractors will be doing the next ball mill start to finish.

Mike:  Wait a minute.  You guys are going to add the media, right?  (NOTE:  The media is a few dozen metric tons of ceramic balls.  It's nasty, grueling work.  Cut bag, dump bag, for about 12 hours).

Roger:  No.  The contractors have been hired by you to INSTALL THE MILL.  That means THE WHOLE THING.

Mike:  (in front of my guys):  But that's not really skilled work.  Your guys can do it.

At this point, the meeting descends into chaos, with all my guys making retard noises and waving their arms around.  Mike becomes offended, and tells me they're insubordinate.  I tell him he's an asshole.  He leaves and tells Jim.  Jim asks my guys.  Nobody remembers a thing.  Mike is now sitting in his office, screaming at anyone who tries to talk to him.

Isn't that what minimum wage temps are for?

Who cares?  My guys aren't doing it.  The contractor is responsible for getting it done.

And it totally wasn't the point.  The point was, he just stood there and told all my guys that they are unskilled.  To their faces.