water on mars?!

[GrannySmith]

really?!? 

http://www.nature.com/ngeo/journal/vaop/ncurrent/full/ngeo2014.html

The presence of liquid water is a requirement of habitability on a planet. Possible indicators of liquid surface water on Mars include intermittent flow-like features observed on sloping terrains. These recurring slope lineae are narrow, dark markings on steep slopes that appear and incrementally lengthen during warm seasons on low-albedo surfaces. The lineae fade in cooler seasons and recur over multiple Mars years. Recurring slope lineae were initially reported to appear and lengthen at mid-latitudes in the late southern spring and summer and are more common on equator-facing slopes where and when the peak surface temperatures are higher. Here we report extensive activity of recurring slope lineae in equatorial regions of Mars, particularly in the deep canyons of Valles Marineris, from analysis of data acquired by the Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter. We observe the lineae to be most active in seasons when the slopes often face the sun. Expected peak temperatures suggest that activity may not depend solely on temperature. Although the origin of the recurring slope lineae remains an open question, our observations are consistent with intermittent flow of briny water. Such an origin suggests surprisingly abundant liquid water in some near-surface equatorial regions of Mars.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Still no horrible tentacle beasts with death rays and giant walking robots.

[Reginald Ret]

Still no horrible tentacle beasts with death rays and giant walking robots.

Give me a few years of living there, I haven't even migrated yet!

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

All the other populated planets in our area now have entire populations living beneath the surface, taking their water with them, to avoid the bombardment of our TV signal being beamed out into space. An intergalactic sanctions committee is being assembled to assess the damage our planet has caused and to determine an appropriate act of contrition and/or reparations. As the onslaught is on-going, and our arrogance only increases, it is hard to accurately determine these things.

There are two factions, one that espouses total annihilation of our planet to stop the endless pollution of space at our hands and one faction that merely wishes to remove all humanity from the planet, leaving the Earth itself to spin on, barren of humans and free from our tyranny. Once the final accord is reached, it's only a matter of time before they come for us.

What they haven't counted on is 1.) Vindaloo fumes trapped in the upper atmosphere, 2.) Honey Boo-Boo, and 3.) LOLCATS.

[Faust]

Awesome I wish they could get in for a closer peak. We can't just send rover to it sadly

If there is any remote chance of life (bacterial) the device has to be fitted with self sterilising canisters which rover wasn't equipped with.

I hope nasa can scrounge up the cash to send a probe. Maybe China or Russia could.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Awesome I wish they could get in for a closer peak. We can't just send rover to it sadly

If there is any remote chance of life (bacterial) the device has to be fitted with self sterilising canisters which rover wasn't equipped with.

I hope nasa can scrounge up the cash to send a probe. Maybe China or Russia could.

Fuck that shit.  Bacteria?  WE have that.  Water?  WE already have that.

Bug-eyed monsters or GTFO.

[Faust]

Awesome I wish they could get in for a closer peak. We can't just send rover to it sadly

If there is any remote chance of life (bacterial) the device has to be fitted with self sterilising canisters which rover wasn't equipped with.

I hope nasa can scrounge up the cash to send a probe. Maybe China or Russia could.

Fuck that shit.  Bacteria?  WE have that.  Water?  WE already have that.

Bug-eyed monsters or GTFO.

[NARRATOR]: "To think the Martians with their all their superior technology were felled by a single tiny microbe. The common aids virus which humans had long since become accustomed to."