Teen Exorcists

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I'm also guessing Larson's diagnostic is about as fair a coin as a Scientologist's e-meter. That is to say, if you take the test, you're one of the 50% afflicted.

[EK WAFFLR]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LjgdR_JUCk < best of Bob Larson.

[Ben Shapiro]

There's a Bear Demon terrorizing all of North East Houston.

[LMNO]

I have it on good authority that the Devil is running around in at least one of the Tucsons.

[Reginald Ret]

yeah, it's $9.95 to find out if you're in the 50% of the population that has demonz

Flipping a quarter will only cost me 25 cents, and only while it's midair.

This is genius.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

It's kind of interesting that teens would be put in this position.

Let us assume for the sake of argument that demonic possession is a real thing, since that's presumably what these girls actually believe.

It's a goddamn demon. It would seem highly irresponsible to send an untrained, psychologically incapable person. Other religious traditions that engage in the practice perform it rarely. Mainly because you really have to go out of your way to say, there's some freaky unexplainable shit going on here, so why not give this last option a shot? I am thinking primarily of the Catholic Church, where, as I understand it, you have to get authorization from the Pope himself to get the go ahead, and those authorizations are exceedingly rare, because 99.999999% of the time, it is due to some sort of mental illness in the patient. But the other end of it is that the exorcist has to be psychologically balanced in order to pull the ritual off. Teenagers are self-conscious and have fragile egos, and have dirty little private thoughts that a telepathic demon will exploit the fuck out of.

For the sake of argument: teenagers are at a point where they are in transition, and points of transition are where people are closest to "the supernatural" in some belief systems. Teenage girls specifically have been associated with poltergeists, and they were used in some areas for witch hunting. Virgin teenage girls (which these ladies undoubtedly profess to be) were the only way you could catch a unicorn. Also, virgin blood for sacrifices, etc. By this (largely historically inaccurate, but memetically robust) reasoning, virgin teenage girls would be very well suited for the job. They are close enough to the supernatural that they can affect it. Their conviction in their faith, and the conviction their marketers have in that faith, will prevent them from entertaining the notion that they could fail.

Also, why would you want someone psychologically sound to do this shit? No, you need someone who's REALLY GOOD at lying to themselves. Someone who can huff their own farts so hard they pass out without noticing the stench.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

It's kind of interesting that teens would be put in this position.

Let us assume for the sake of argument that demonic possession is a real thing, since that's presumably what these girls actually believe.

It's a goddamn demon. It would seem highly irresponsible to send an untrained, psychologically incapable person. Other religious traditions that engage in the practice perform it rarely. Mainly because you really have to go out of your way to say, there's some freaky unexplainable shit going on here, so why not give this last option a shot? I am thinking primarily of the Catholic Church, where, as I understand it, you have to get authorization from the Pope himself to get the go ahead, and those authorizations are exceedingly rare, because 99.999999% of the time, it is due to some sort of mental illness in the patient. But the other end of it is that the exorcist has to be psychologically balanced in order to pull the ritual off. Teenagers are self-conscious and have fragile egos, and have dirty little private thoughts that a telepathic demon will exploit the fuck out of.

For the sake of argument: teenagers are at a point where they are in transition, and points of transition are where people are closest to "the supernatural" in some belief systems. Teenage girls specifically have been associated with poltergeists, and they were used in some areas for witch hunting. Virgin teenage girls (which these ladies undoubtedly profess to be) were the only way you could catch a unicorn. Also, virgin blood for sacrifices, etc. By this (largely historically inaccurate, but memetically robust) reasoning, virgin teenage girls would be very well suited for the job. They are close enough to the supernatural that they can affect it. Their conviction in their faith, and the conviction their marketers have in that faith, will prevent them from entertaining the notion that they could fail.

Also, why would you want someone psychologically sound to do this shit? No, you need someone who's REALLY GOOD at lying to themselves. Someone who can huff their own farts so hard they pass out without noticing the stench.

Ah virginity. Fair. But i suspect that has more to do with folklore than anything biblically based.

[LMNO]

Not to be That Guy, but five bucks says the woman on the left isn't a virgin.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Not to be That Guy, but five bucks says the woman on the left isn't a virgin.

Isn't she the one that's like 15? (see Anderson Cooper link)

[LMNO]

I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Christians do it better sooner.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Actually, isn't there a statistic that religious conservative teens are more likely to get abortions? Or is that BS?

[Richter]

I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Christians do it better sooner.

Saddlebacking?

[LMNO]

I don't want to start this up, but losing one's virginity on or prior to 15 is not surprising to me.

It's awful, but not surprising.

Christians do it better sooner.

Saddlebacking?

[Junkenstein]

Not to be That Guy, but five bucks says the woman on the left isn't a virgin.

I'll take that bet. Care to give your reasoning?

Actually, isn't there a statistic that religious conservative teens are more likely to get abortions? Or is that BS?

There's a direct relationship between how often you shove your religion in peoples faces and the likelihood of it coming back to haunt you.