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It's that time of year again...

Started by AFK, October 16, 2013, 03:19:25 PM

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AFK

Nah, that only proves that Pearl Jam were safer, probably because they were the blandest of the Seattle bands.  They had some good moments on Ten, but it was all downhill from there. 
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

AFK

Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

AFK

Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

The Good Reverend Roger

One significant risk is that the high frequency of the farts will create an oscillation in the ass cheeks, causing them to ripple like those guys' faces in old NASA footage of G-force testing.  Nothing good can come from this...The danger to nearby personnel is pretty obvious, and who wants THAT in their obituary?  "Killed by wildly flapping ass cheeks.  Closed casket funeral.  Please send donations in leiu of flowers, etc".

The only real hope when this happens is that he'll fart again, thus interrupting the forming wave.  Of course this has its own risks, as it may in fact cause the very rupture discussed upthread, resulting in the destruction of Maine and rendering Quebec uninhabitable for hundreds of years.  Sort of a poop-Fukishima.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Don Coyote

Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 18, 2013, 07:01:15 PM
One significant risk is that the high frequency of the farts will create an oscillation in the ass cheeks, causing them to ripple like those guys' faces in old NASA footage of G-force testing.  Nothing good can come from this...The danger to nearby personnel is pretty obvious, and who wants THAT in their obituary?  "Killed by wildly flapping ass cheeks.  Closed casket funeral.  Please send donations in leiu of flowers, etc".

The only real hope when this happens is that he'll fart again, thus interrupting the forming wave.  Of course this has its own risks, as it may in fact cause the very rupture discussed upthread, resulting in the destruction of Maine and rendering Quebec uninhabitable for hundreds of years.  Sort of a poop-Fukishima.

This entire argument is predicated on the idea that he is in possession of an ass in the first place. If he is incapable of filling a suit, it must surely follow that he is not in possession of a "booty"

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Don Coyote on October 18, 2013, 07:07:38 PM
This entire argument is predicated on the idea that he is in possession of an ass in the first place. If he is incapable of filling a suit, it must surely follow that he is not in possession of a "booty"

See upthread.  This has been explained.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

I'd like to propose a radical new treatment.

As preparation, you'll want to ingest a good quantity of iron filings along with your food.  A good double handfull of pistachios will help smooth out the consistancy variations.

1. Carefully wrap your commode in about a dozen layers of large gauge copper wire.

2. run a circuit to the largest industrial grade generator you can find.

Now, when attempting to take a shit, switch on the power. You should feel the induction force pulling on the stool, unless you reversed your polarity, in which case you just had one HELL of a belch.  Clean the wall.

Good luck.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Junkenstein

I endorse this as a qualified professional.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Demolition Squid

I just wanted to add that Roger's posts ITT have been awesome.

I don't exactly have sympathy for RWHN now, but I can at least see where it all went so horribly, horribly wrong for him.  :sad:
Vast and Roaring Nipplebeast from the Dawn of Soho

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Demolition Squid on October 18, 2013, 08:49:53 PM
I just wanted to add that Roger's posts ITT have been awesome.

:lulz:  Thanks.

I was bored stupid by the same old rehashed crap that's essentially no different than a drug thread, and my inner jackass got out.  Seriously, it's the same old shit.  People say things, RWHN says "NUH HUH", and then people say things and RWHN says "NUH HUH" again, rinse, repeat.  Look at the OP...This was intentional (hence the pot o' beans response I posted in the first reply).  It's the SAME OLD SHIT AS ALWAYS.  RWHN is here to be RIGHT and to tell you WHAT.

The only funny bit is that he still can't get it through his bitty little head that he's an annoying twerp that has managed to alienate everyone, rather than being a victim of the Roger/Nigel CIA Mind Control Machine.

Because his poop has backed right up his spinal column and into his brain.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Demolition Squid

Yeah.

I promised myself I was going to stop giving RWHN the time of day, but he's good at what he does. It pissed me off so much I actually put some effort into that response (which got entirely ignored, of course, as dealing with any criticism which demands more than 'nope' is too much for fecal-matter clogged braincells).

On the plus side, though, I discovered a cool artist I hadn't heard before, so I'm going to take this one as a victory.
Vast and Roaring Nipplebeast from the Dawn of Soho

Ben Shapiro

Fuck that! The monkey wants to dance for peanuts and a new collar by God almighty I'm going to deliver. Dance jackass dance I tucked in your kids early read to them how awesome their dad is for putting kids their age in jail.

East Coast Hustle

Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 18, 2013, 03:52:07 PM
I would like to take a moment to point out that RWHN was still literally a child in some Maine backwoods when Nirvana emerged. I was here and into the music scene in Olympia and Portland... FFS, Nirvana opened for my boyfriend's band at Satyricon, and I worked with guys from Sweaty Nipples and Hitting Birth. Nervous Xtians were still popular, you could see 3 bands for 3 bucks Tuesday nights at Pine Street/La Luna, and I was writing and doing photography for the local music paper in Portland. The reality was, A BAND was going to get tapped to be repackaged for popular consumption because alt rock was skyrocketing in popularity, and everybody was a little baffled that it was Nirvana, but like I said before, Cobain was photogenic. Nirvana's popularity was an effect of the rising popularity and marketability of alt rock, not a cause. This is obvious to anyone who was actually THERE. Which RWHN wasn't, and is clearly piecing together his notions about how it went from magazine retrospectives. Cobain's suicide sealed the deal; without it they would have been just another 90's alt band, and not THE 90's alt band in so many people's minds.

So much this. Soundgarden was already signed to a major deal BEFORE Nirvana broke. Mother Love Bone was already slated to be "that band" but then Andrew Wood OD'd so another photogenic singer with junkie eyes and a catchy backing band had to be found. And the music industry and media had already been present in the PNW. Nirvana didn't draw attention to the PNW, they were just the largest beneficiaries of the attention that was already there.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

East Coast Hustle

Quote from: Hoopla on October 18, 2013, 04:27:46 PM
Quote from: Not Your Average Mean on October 18, 2013, 04:05:20 PM
Nirvana were huge when Cobain killed himself.  What sealed the deal was the fact that they engaged so many through their music.  One of the things Kurt struggled with was the fact that they were drawing not just the weirdos into left-of-center music.  They were drawing the jocks, the preppies, the rich kids, the middle class kids, the poor kids, boys and girls, the smart kids, everyone.  "Come As You Are".

It wasn't just going to be any band.  Yes, there was a generation of kids waiting for a band or music movement to come along that would speak to them and include them.  Hair metal wasn't doing it, the pop mainstream of the day wasn't doing it.  Nirvana rumbled in with "Teen Spirit" and youth culture responded with a "Fuck Yes". 

Pearl Jam couldn't have done that, Soundgarden couldn't, AIC couldn't. Nirvana was the only band set up to do that.  And there hasn't been a band that has done that since.

Period.

You and I are close to the same age... what sort of high school did you go to?  At my school Nirvana was certainly very popular (to my dismay) but equally so, at that time, was Pearl Jam and a plethora of other "alternative" bands I loathed.  You know what else was extremely popular with the youth?  Probably more so?  Hip fucking hop.  The 90s were not the niche market you seem to recall.

Nevermind broke during my freshman year. Most of the kids were listening to shitty hip-hop (Vanilla Ice was HUGE) and the kids who were actually into the local rock scene were mostly into Mudhoney, Sweaty Nipples, Rhino Humpers, and Gruntruck. Nirvana was for the weird kids who watched 120 Minutes and liked Siouxsie and the Banshees.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

LMNO

Hey, don't bring Siouxie into this...