To my nosey ass hipster neighbors:

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

In the summer, at night, the people across the street can see directly into my living room. So when I make the sweet body music with my dear girlfriend, rather than showing them her glorious form, I make sure to bend over and give them a good look into my hairy brown eye, just in case.

I wish I could do that.  I mean, they get the hair, but there's too much hair for them to get the rest.

Yeah, that's unfortunate. For the full effect, you really need that faint glimpse of pale, quivering mass underneath. A flesh undulating and hidden beneath that tangle of scraggley, furious hair. It reflects the moonlight and there, peeking from within, the nightmare of dank knot. An exit from a world of woes, a hellish portal created seemingly for malevolence alone. And beyond that, just shy of a furiously flapping scrotum bedecked in more wirey insulation, a plane of skin that has never seen a happy day and never will.

And then, just briefly, in the fraction of a second betweeen the spectacle catching your eye and the wracking shudder that follows, you know that taint all to well. For that moment, you are the taint. Then you are changed forever.

Oh no. Oh no. THIS is the best ever. 

[Suu]

In the summer, at night, the people across the street can see directly into my living room. So when I make the sweet body music with my dear girlfriend, rather than showing them her glorious form, I make sure to bend over and give them a good look into my hairy brown eye, just in case.

I wish I could do that.  I mean, they get the hair, but there's too much hair for them to get the rest.

Yeah, that's unfortunate. For the full effect, you really need that faint glimpse of pale, quivering mass underneath. A flesh undulating and hidden beneath that tangle of scraggley, furious hair. It reflects the moonlight and there, peeking from within, the nightmare of dank knot. An exit from a world of woes, a hellish portal created seemingly for malevolence alone. And beyond that, just shy of a furiously flapping scrotum bedecked in more wirey insulation, a plane of skin that has never seen a happy day and never will.

And then, just briefly, in the fraction of a second betweeen the spectacle catching your eye and the wracking shudder that follows, you know that taint all to well. For that moment, you are the taint. Then you are changed forever.

I don't feel very pretty right now.   

Hush.

You are beautiful.   

Holy.
Fucking.

[Ben Shapiro]

In the summer, at night, the people across the street can see directly into my living room. So when I make the sweet body music with my dear girlfriend, rather than showing them her glorious form, I make sure to bend over and give them a good look into my hairy brown eye, just in case.

I wish I could do that.  I mean, they get the hair, but there's too much hair for them to get the rest.

Yeah, that's unfortunate. For the full effect, you really need that faint glimpse of pale, quivering mass underneath. A flesh undulating and hidden beneath that tangle of scraggley, furious hair. It reflects the moonlight and there, peeking from within, the nightmare of dank knot. An exit from a world of woes, a hellish portal created seemingly for malevolence alone. And beyond that, just shy of a furiously flapping scrotum bedecked in more wirey insulation, a plane of skin that has never seen a happy day and never will.

And then, just briefly, in the fraction of a second betweeen the spectacle catching your eye and the wracking shudder that follows, you know that taint all to well. For that moment, you are the taint. Then you are changed forever.

I don't feel very pretty right now.   

Hush.

You are beautiful.   

Holy.
Fucking.

:lolz:

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

If you gaze into the taint, the taint gazes also at you.

[Richter]

You need to see them, almost by chance, in passing on the street.  Look them full in the eyes and smile - nicely, no overdoing it.  In a mid-civil voice just ay "Hi..."

As they stutter to reply turn it on full cold and growl  "Perv.", and walk away. 


Start a pool on how quickly they become "Feminists"

[Suu]

I do plan to have every goddamn window drawn during the sex toy party next month. Wave those schlongs around, girls!