The Biology Thread

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I honestly think that's the only explanation. I was bedbug free for like, a year. And now they're back? The only other logical explanation is that I brought them to work, and they at some point commuted back with me.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

Sleeping is difficult again. The every little leg hair thing, you know. Same spiel as before, let them bite me until they die from the walk. It's frustrating because it's like, you fuckers have been gone for a year, and I know you can't live that long without blood. Oh, time to shake the flask, incidentally.

Alive. Barely kicking. Literally. Energy saving mechanism?

I'm somewhat tempted to let my guest feed on me through a cloth bound to the flask with rubber bands and observe further, to see if it molts or something. I watched it poop, as well as do the tell the drummer there's a pizza in a corner of a round room trick. That gets old fast.

I'm also tempted to see how long a small amount of D Earth will kill it. For science. THat would actually be a useful baseline measurement.

But I also hate my guest.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I just finished writing my research proposal. Here's an excerpt:

While these modern fertilizers have long dominated both the mainstream agricultural market and the home horticulturalist's garden, and the ready availability of fish meal and composted manure is sufficient for most organic growers, there may be some value in knowing whether the application of raw fish into the planting hole may be as effective a fertilizer as modern methods. In the case of a zombie apocalypse, for example, herring may be extraordinarily plentiful in many regions, while commercial fertilizers may be obtainable only via looting home improvement centers, or may be unavailable altogether. Therefore, some understanding of the efficacy of using raw fish for fertilizing staple grain crops such as maize may become avantageous.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Some not-especially-lucid notes from today's refresher on the plant life cycle, transcribed from my notebook.

STUPID FLOWERS
*spore mother cell --> Meiosis --> Spore
Fuck plants.
Little bastard starts as a seed, grows into a sporophyte (plant) which pops out a flower which has microspore and megaspore mother cells. Microspore mother cells shit out microspores via meiosis, making the male gametophyte generation. Megaspore mother cells do meiosis in the ovary to produce megaspore ova, which these pollens land on (the stigma of the ovary) and mitose to make two sperm, and then it grows a long-ass tube which it sticks down the ovary to fertilize the ovum. The ovule has meiosed into four cells; one ovum, and three other stupid cells. At least one of them is a germ cell or some shit; maybe two of them. OK, all three of them, and it's called the endosperm. One of the sperm fertilizes the ovum, and the other one fertilizes some other shit that basically grows into a retarded twin for the embryo to cannibalize.

Plants are extortionist assholes who bribe other organisms to do all the hard work.

Monocots do some other shit with the endosperm.

[Pæs]

 

[Nephew Twiddleton]

 

Here's a bit from my notes on bacteria:

BSC [Biological Species Concept] is bullshit in these domains. Reproduce every 20 minutes.
Prokaryotes are hipsters [in reaction to the professor saying how prokaryotes invented all the stuff our cells do]
Most biology is microbial. Fucking hipsters everywhere.
Less than 1% pathogenic.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

After your horror story on the way to Tucson, the first thing I do at every hotel I go to is pull the mattress away from the wall and check it and the sheets for the little fuckers.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

After your horror story on the way to Tucson, the first thing I do at every hotel I go to is pull the mattress away from the wall and check it and the sheets for the little fuckers.

That's wise. VERY wise.

One of the bead ladies has shared that little video you posted earlier, and the other bead ladies are reacting with horror. The best part? The one who shared it knows perfectly well it's not real, but the ones reacting don't. 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

After your horror story on the way to Tucson, the first thing I do at every hotel I go to is pull the mattress away from the wall and check it and the sheets for the little fuckers.

That's wise. VERY wise.

One of the bead ladies has shared that little video you posted earlier, and the other bead ladies are reacting with horror. The best part? The one who shared it knows perfectly well it's not real, but the ones reacting don't. 

Which video?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

After your horror story on the way to Tucson, the first thing I do at every hotel I go to is pull the mattress away from the wall and check it and the sheets for the little fuckers.

That's wise. VERY wise.

One of the bead ladies has shared that little video you posted earlier, and the other bead ladies are reacting with horror. The best part? The one who shared it knows perfectly well it's not real, but the ones reacting don't. 

Which video?

The bedbug one.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

After your horror story on the way to Tucson, the first thing I do at every hotel I go to is pull the mattress away from the wall and check it and the sheets for the little fuckers.

That's wise. VERY wise.

One of the bead ladies has shared that little video you posted earlier, and the other bead ladies are reacting with horror. The best part? The one who shared it knows perfectly well it's not real, but the ones reacting don't. 

Which video?

The bedbug one.

Derp.  We can totally top this.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Ugh, that's horrible, Twid!

I have a horror of the little bastards. It was actually difficult for me to stay in a motel when we went to the coast last week, I kept checking the mattress and the corners for signs.

After your horror story on the way to Tucson, the first thing I do at every hotel I go to is pull the mattress away from the wall and check it and the sheets for the little fuckers.

That's wise. VERY wise.

One of the bead ladies has shared that little video you posted earlier, and the other bead ladies are reacting with horror. The best part? The one who shared it knows perfectly well it's not real, but the ones reacting don't. 

Which video?

The bedbug one.

Derp.  We can totally top this.

Oh, absolutely.