Author Topic: Rant at the game you're playing  (Read 4050 times)

Pæs

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Rant at the game you're playing
« on: November 27, 2013, 04:14:54 am »
I don't know who else ever needs to yell about their gaming, but here goes.

DEAR ASSASSIN'S CREED: BLACK FLAG.

SUCK A DOZEN DICKS. IF YOU PROVIDE THE OPTION TO USE NON-LETHAL MEANS TO DISPOSE OF OPPONENTS, DON'T HAVE A BUTTON WITH A TOOLTIP LABELLED "KNOCK OUT" IF SOMETIMES THAT BUTTON WILL, DEPENDING ON YOUR CHARACTER'S PROXIMITY TO SOMETHING INTERESTING LIKE A WALL OR A LONG FALL, CHANGE TO "KILL" AS SOON AS THE BUTTON IS PRESSED.

SOME PEOPLE LIKE TO PLAY NON-LETHAL PLAYTHROUGHS TO CHALLENGE THEMSELVES BECAUSE YOUR AI IS UNINTERESTING AND YOUR OPPONENTS SIMPLE TO THWART IN ANY NUMBER. THANKS FOR RUINING MINE A GOODLY PART OF THE WAY INTO THE GAME BY HAVING ME ACCIDENTALLY SNAP SOMEONE'S NECK THEN THROW THEM OFF A TOWER INSTEAD OF SIMPLY SLAPPING THEIR FACE.

ALSO, IF YOU'RE GOING TO GET ALL "LOLNO" TO MY PLAYSTYLE, I'D APPRECIATE IT IF YOU DIDN'T AUTOSAVE AFTER EVERY FEW KILLS, MAKING IT IMPOSSIBLE TO STRIKE THAT "ENEMIES KILLED: 1" OFF MY STATS SHEET.

FUCK YOU.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2013, 05:57:03 am »
 :lulz:
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Cain

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #2 on: November 27, 2013, 10:10:07 am »
I'd like to complain about Black Flag as well.

But I cannot.  Literally.  Because it runs so painfully slow on my laptop I've been completely put off playing it.

Cain

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #3 on: November 27, 2013, 01:45:48 pm »
I could upload my test run with the mic I did earlier today, actually, with the Mass Effect 3 multiplayer.  I need to adjust the mic/game volume for better clarity (which is why I was doing it), but I got put into a half hour long slugfest of a game, where I scored 4 times as much as the next player.  It was pretty gruelling, to say the least.

Reginald Ret

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2013, 02:15:59 pm »
Hey Risen 2! Don't make a mandatory minigame that requires a better computer than the rest of the game! I hate getting stuck on a drunk knifethrowing contest in a pirate bar.
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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #5 on: November 30, 2013, 02:27:26 am »
Hey Torchlight II! If the only viable build for a class requires totally different stats than the ones you need to use the class-specific equipment, maybe all your Outlander shit shouldn't focus on Dexterity. Also, fuck ranged weapons. Seriously, who the hell on your design team thought it was a good idea to design them with a different required stat than the one that actually affects their damage output?
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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #6 on: November 30, 2013, 02:30:00 am »
Fuck you, Candybox 2.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


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Lord Byron: "Those who will not reason, are bigots, those who cannot, are fools, and those who dare not, are slaves."

Nigel saying the wisest words ever uttered: "It's just a suffix."

"The worst forum ever" "The most mediocre forum on the internet" "The dumbest forum on the internet" "The most retarded forum on the internet" "The lamest forum on the internet" "The coolest forum on the internet"

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #10 on: March 26, 2014, 11:34:17 pm »
Fuck you, Civ V.  How does a modern tank not kill the fuck out of a cavalry unit with one shot?
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Pæs

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #11 on: March 26, 2014, 11:35:07 pm »
DEAR BETHESDA,

PSYCHIC GUARDS DON'T MAKE THE GAME FEEL DYNAMIC, THEY BREAK MY IMMERSION.

BACKGROUND: I AM A POWERFUL NECROMANCER, DISGUISED AS A HUMBLE MERCHANT. EVERY TIME I ROLL INTO A TOWN TO PEDDLE MY WARES, THE GUARDS GREET ME WITH "HAIL, SUMMONER" WHICH IS THE GAME'S WAY OF SAYING "I CARE ABOUT YOUR ROLEPLAY CHOICES".

I KEEP HAVING TO KILL GUARDS FOR KNOWING MY SECRET. SOMEONE IS GOING TO FIND THIS PILE OF GUARDS AND ACTUALLY HAVE LEGITIMATE CAUSE FOR BEING SUSPICIOUS OF ME.

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #12 on: March 26, 2014, 11:35:43 pm »
DEAR BETHESDA,

PSYCHIC GUARDS DON'T MAKE THE GAME FEEL DYNAMIC, THEY BREAK MY IMMERSION.

BACKGROUND: I AM A POWERFUL NECROMANCER, DISGUISED AS A HUMBLE MERCHANT. EVERY TIME I ROLL INTO A TOWN TO PEDDLE MY WARES, THE GUARDS GREET ME WITH "HAIL, SUMMONER" WHICH IS THE GAME'S WAY OF SAYING "I CARE ABOUT YOUR ROLEPLAY CHOICES".

I KEEP HAVING TO KILL GUARDS FOR KNOWING MY SECRET. SOMEONE IS GOING TO FIND THIS PILE OF GUARDS AND ACTUALLY HAVE LEGITIMATE CAUSE FOR BEING SUSPICIOUS OF ME.

 :lulz:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #13 on: March 26, 2014, 11:36:43 pm »
That old fart in Diablo, right?

"HAIL PALADIN!"

WTF?  I'm just some guy in a suit of shitty armor and shortsword.  For all YOU know, I run the thieves' guild.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Eater of Clowns

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Re: Rant at the game you're playing
« Reply #14 on: March 26, 2014, 11:47:44 pm »
That old fart in Diablo, right?

"HAIL PALADIN!"

WTF?  I'm just some guy in a suit of shitty armor and shortsword.  For all YOU know, I run the thieves' guild.

It's classist as shit. I bet to him, all Paladins look alike.
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