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I wish I had a scanner...

Started by I_Kicked_Kennedy, January 15, 2014, 05:21:09 AM

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I_Kicked_Kennedy

I'm trying to finish a manuscript that's due on 12/31... Of last year. Through the shades there's flashes of red and blue, and I peek out to see four cruisers. It's the Colored Light Brigade and they're all over the place. I can't figure out what's going on. Here's what I can see:

-Something is wet on the road, a big puddle, and doesn't look like anything splashed (but not water, because it's 22 degrees out, so it would have frozen)
-Some older looking lady has a belt in her hand and is talking to one officer, and he doesn't have his notepad out, or seem like it's an official thing
-One car is parked, but with two wheels on the curb, can't see any damage
- No road flares
- occasionally,  someone will point up at the top of the house across the street and people will look up
- One of the police officers reached in his car and started blasting that "Burning Heart" song that was in one of the Rocky movies,  and everyone started smiling,  then one walked over and appeared to be chewing him out until he turned it off.
-Nothing smashed or broken is on the pavement
-A little girl came out the front door of the previously mentioned house and everyone yelled for her to get inside,  almost like they were worried something would happen

What the hell is going on??
If I had a million dollars, I'd put it all in a sensible mutual fund.

Anna Mae Bollocks

I've got nothing.
The wet spot might be puke from whoever parked half on the curb. Other than that, it makes no sense. Sounds like everybody's just fucking around at this point, pointing at the roof might mean they're discussing a damn sattelite dish or something.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

I_Kicked_Kennedy

#2
Spoke with a neighbor this afternoon who is also an EMT. The story isn't really that exciting:

Lady across the street has a live-in BF who drove home absolutely shitfaced. The car with two wheels on the curb was his parking job. He got out and started taking a piss in the middle of the road. Cop drove by and pulled over to address the situation while he was pissing. Guy ran inside. Police officer politely rang the doorbell after another arrived and the guy shouted that he had guns inside. OK,  now it's just been taken to that level, and more cops arrive. Girlfriend walks out and says "he doesn't have guns, just go in and get him. The guy tried to make a daring escape out the upstairs window, but inadvertently went through the window. Somehow, no injuries,  but the window was smashed (didn't see the glass because of the snow, I guess).

When I looked up, that was the scene. The guy was in the back of the cruiser at the time, and they were waiting for EMT to arrive to verify he hadn't sustained any injuries. The guy was shouting "Let's get some tunes, man!" because he was drunk and bored. I suppose the one cop thought it would be funny to oblige.  Regarding the belt, they didn't have an answer. Only guess was maybe they took it as a precaution because they'd take it at the holding center to prevent a suicide.

So, yeah. That's my Neighborhood.

I finished the book, if anyone cares.
If I had a million dollars, I'd put it all in a sensible mutual fund.

I_Kicked_Kennedy

Only thing I didn't think to ask... did the piss not freeze because he had that much alcohol in his system,  or does urine have a lower freezing point?
If I had a million dollars, I'd put it all in a sensible mutual fund.