Full of sound and fury . . .

[Horab Fibslager]

well that's teh thing about the plan now aint it?


it's rigth fuct from our perspective, but shit happens.

[~~~~Closed~~~~]

God needs to be impeached.

[BipolarFastCycler]

To me, things are perfect here. Life is perfect for the human psyche, mostly because it is filled with imperfections. We are like children with a new video game; they play it honestly for a minute or two, and then they urge to cheat. Yet, once they get their easy way out, the game becomes dull. They really wish that they could play the game honestly, but once the easy way has been introduced, there is no turning back for them. God can keep his damn easy way out; I want life to be entertaining, not easy.

In these crazy lives of ours, we experience highs and lows that give everything their proper intensity. We are left to wonder about so many things, but these things are usually what is the most fascinating. If we knew what is beyond death, imagine how hum-drum plays and other artforms would be. There is no cliffhanger in such an unpleasantly certain existence, and every good story tends to have one. Humans are gently placed among countless solar systems and such, and each formation is more beautiful than the last. We are surrounded by so many types of life, that we cannot even estimate how many species we have not discovered. God, in whatever form, is doing just fine in my eyes, but people can think anything they want.

Earth is the playground of philosophers, and I wouldn't want it any different.

[agent compassion]

Hotsuma: God needs to be impeached.

And convicted. House impeaches, Senate convicts.

[I'm a nerd. Go on, ask me how a bill becomes a law!]

*sigh*

I think horab made one good point there, earlier - that there's a lesson in everything.

I know this year Christmas has had more meaning for me, realizing that people you care about can just disappear without warning. I said to myself, "not again." I mean, he was one of my heroes...heroes dying, that's a strange thing, now I know how the Superman fans felt when Chris Reeve died. And so I decided hey, I have someone else that is also a hero to me, that I will tell while I can how I feel. So I wrote him a letter, and made a CD of meaningful songs, and on Monday it gets mailed.

And I did a ritual, in my own impromptu style, to sort of say goodbye to my teacher, but mostly to take all that energy, that grief, and send it on to someone else in my family who needs this lesson too.

He ran from us, because he felt like a victim(goddess only knows why) and he married a woman who hated us all from day one, and she controls him, and he lets her, and as a result we have not seen him in 6 months, or his baby, and he says hateful things to my parents in emails....and he seems to think that he is completely justified and that someday my parents will apologise on bended knee for these imagined wrongs they've committed. I lived in the same house as him, I knew him all his life, and I can say with authority that he was never abused or neglected, but he seems to think he was.

So I took my sorrow and sent it to him on the wind, and said "Little brother, you have to learn that real adults never take other people for granted, and that you think you hate Mom and Dad now, but someday they won't be here, and you'll feel like a real schmuck if you never patch this up with them."

Merry Fucking Christmas, little brother.

[Bob the Mediocre]

I hope he reads the letter then, ac. And actually pays attention to what you're saying.

[agent compassion]

I didn't write to my little brother - I did a ritual, and hope that the message gets to him.

The letter I wrote was for someone else whose presence changed me, and I'm glad it did, and now that the letter's about to go out I feel like it isn't saying half of what I feel - but I have a feeling that he already knows the things I don't have the guts to say out loud, just based on the way he treated me when he was around...

Christmas came and went, with no sign of my little brother. No surprise there, but honestly, just on a point of practicality I need to get in touch with him, without his "keeper" in the way, because I have a present for his baby, and she's gonna outgrow the bobdamn thing if this impasse goes on too much longer.

[Bob the Mediocre]

Good luck with getting in touch then.

And I thought things were strained with my aunt...

[Wishfarple]

It isn't so much the people who have the faith in an activist God (as Agent described them) that bothers me, its the condescending schmucks who simply prattle off easy phrases to deal with uncomfortable questions (again, such as Agent raised).

"God has a Plan," you say? Then what is it, asshat? I know a guy dying of prostate cancer, who just had to bury his much-younger wife, who died unexpectedly of a stroke. Now he's lost all will to fight, and the most common answers anyone gives him when he asks "Why God does this shit to him" is... as you might expect...

"God has a Plan," or
"She's waiting for you in Heaven."

Yeah, those should really make him feel better about all the pain in his life, as well as bolster his will to fight for life!

My answer: "That sucks, dude. Are you okay? How can I help?"

Maybe if some of these condescending fuckwads would realize that this guy isn't questioning their faith, but mearly looking for solace on this Earthly plane, they could come up with something better than that weak tripe they spew.

Merry Fucking Christmas.

It isn't just the condescension that bothers me.  It's that people who do this seem to be using it as an easy out, a way to avoid really caring about and empathizing with the person having a problem.  They're hiding behind their ideas about God instead of dealing with what's going on around them.  How about we take off the white robes and halos for a bit and put on a damn pair of pants and some boots, and get to work, eh?  

Although, I suppose it's not much different from people who spout aphorisms and things they read in books in response to problems, to avoid thinking about them.  It's just a different source they're drawing from.

And AC, it sounds like you're having a really rough time right now.  Feel free to get in touch if you want someone to talk to.  My IM s/n is in my profile.

[agent compassion]

Well, I saw my brother today, for about ten seconds. My mom and I decided to try and drop off the presents at his work. He says he's working 70 hours a week, dunno if that is true, but it doesn't matter. He's not going to wake up until he's ready to, and see that his wife is insecure, controlling and passive-aggressive.(How do I know the tricks she plays? I used to play them myself when I was a stupid kid!) Seeing the look on his face, I knew he was the same as ever, hardheaded, and he'll just go the long way as usual, why should that have changed? He doesn't understand that in rebelling against his father, he's playing out the same patterns in a new generation(my grandfather was manipulative and cruel, and my father didn't visit him for years either.)

The letter's sent, that's done with. I hope that goes well...I think it will.

How about we take off the white robes and halos for a bit and put on a damn pair of pants and some boots, and get to work, eh?

Although, I suppose it's not much different from people who spout aphorisms and things they read in books in response to problems, to avoid thinking about them. It's just a different source they're drawing from.

My father in law's kinda like that. He's always talking about Jesus and stuff to my husband, as if someday my husband's going to just whip up a batch of potato salad and come waltzing back into church one day. He's not. He's independent, he asks questions, the church doesn't like that sort of thing.
He once had a rough patch and sought counseling- his dad said "You don't need counseling, you need Jesus, he can take care of it."

Which is like, ok, for him maybe, but how does he know that the counselor isn't doing his work as a service to humanity, and that it isn't a sacred thing in its own right, to dedicate oneself to healing others in pain? Sounds like just the sort of thing Jesus used to do....right?

But he's a nice person nevertheless, and so I try to be discreet about my own non-Christianness when they're around. I even joined in when he said Grace, though I did this prayer in my head while he was talking:

Hail Eris, full of Grace, Goddess who gets in your face, Holy Queen of Outer Space, Hail Eris, full of Grace.

And AC, it sounds like you're having a really rough time right now. Feel free to get in touch if you want someone to talk to. My IM s/n is in my profile.

I don't have IM, but thanks. I feel ... I don't know. It doesn't feel as bad as it did last week, but at the same time, I can't bear to read any more news articles about him(there were several in local papers) just yet. He was one of the people I thought I might see at my HS reunion next year(since some of them have the teachers too). So much for that.

And my brother....well, it hurts my parents a lot more than it hurts me, but at this point, I feel like I'm venting the anger that my mother isn't able to express herself yet. Saying it so she doesn't have to, in a way. And I want to just smack him and say "You think you have it so bad? Do you? You have a home. Your child is healthy. You have food and heat and entertainment and transportation. You have insurance. You have family who cares about you. What the FUCK is wrong with you that you have to look at one little thing and pick at it and pick at it and pick at it until you bleed and then you lick that wound and say 'Oh, I'm such a VICTIM!'"

And then I think, I'm an enormous idiot for letting THIS get to me. Why should it? He's my brother, he's always done things this way, why should I let it ruin my life?

[Wishfarple]

My father in law's kinda like that. He's always talking about Jesus and stuff to my husband, as if someday my husband's going to just whip up a batch of potato salad and come waltzing back into church one day. He's not. He's independent, he asks questions, the church doesn't like that sort of thing.

Not the traditional Church, no.  There is a growing movement these days called the Emerging Church that is basically all about asking hard questions and finding new ways to worship.  You didn't ask about that, but I think it's cool so I mentioned it.

But he's a nice person nevertheless, and so I try to be discreet about my own non-Christianness when they're around. I even joined in when he said Grace, though I did this prayer in my head while he was talking:

Hail Eris, full of Grace, Goddess who gets in your face, Holy Queen of Outer Space, Hail Eris, full of Grace.

Now THAT's a good prayer!

And my brother....well, it hurts my parents a lot more than it hurts me, but at this point, I feel like I'm venting the anger that my mother isn't able to express herself yet. Saying it so she doesn't have to, in a way. And I want to just smack him and say "You think you have it so bad? Do you? You have a home. Your child is healthy. You have food and heat and entertainment and transportation. You have insurance. You have family who cares about you. What the FUCK is wrong with you that you have to look at one little thing and pick at it and pick at it and pick at it until you bleed and then you lick that wound and say 'Oh, I'm such a VICTIM!'"

And then I think, I'm an enormous idiot for letting THIS get to me. Why should it? He's my brother, he's always done things this way, why should I let it ruin my life?

Why should it get to you?  Well, because he's your brother, and you obviously care a great deal about both him and the rest of your family.  Can't see anything wrong with that.  Having several members of my extended family who have become "black sheep" through the disapproval of the rest of the family, I can tell you that it isn't satisfying for anyone involved.  Nothing ever gets resolved, there's nothing but bad feelings all around, and even innocent children become involved in some cases.  Much better to suffer some indigestion for your brother now than to lose him forever, I think.

[agent compassion]

Not the traditional Church, no. There is a growing movement these days called the Emerging Church that is basically all about asking hard questions and finding new ways to worship. You didn't ask about that, but I think it's cool so I mentioned it.

Ooh...I'll have to tell him about that! He was raised Baptist, hence the frustration, and my 'potato salad' comment. But in the way he thinks and talks about things, he's closer to a Gnostic and he's also exploring Discordianism.

Why should it get to you? Well, because he's your brother, and you obviously care a great deal about both him and the rest of your family. Can't see anything wrong with that. Having several members of my extended family who have become "black sheep" through the disapproval of the rest of the family, I can tell you that it isn't satisfying for anyone involved. Nothing ever gets resolved, there's nothing but bad feelings all around, and even innocent children become involved in some cases. Much better to suffer some indigestion for your brother now than to lose him forever, I think.

Innocent children, for sure. His baby is 1 and well, she's also the first grandbaby. And if this keeps up....

*sigh* I'm not gonna pretend my brother and I had some idyllic relationship - he's got a severe competitive streak and was always trying to "beat me" at something(I'm the oldest, and he's the second, so - *shrug*). We fought like cats and dogs for a LONG time. But for a few years there, we were getting along pretty good. He had the habit of going into his room and turning up the music really loud when he was pissed off instead of talking to people, but sometimes late at night, he would come and talk to me and tell me all kinds of things.

The thing that's got me head-scratching is this: He has NEVER accepted anyone telling him what to do, or even suggesting it with good intentions, because he HATES being controlled or feeling like he is. So how did he end up with this controlling wife? Weird.

I just don't know what to think anymore. The whole thing is a big tangle. He'll come back, or he won't. He'll wise up that his wife's got some serious issues, or he won't. I feel like he'll come back eventually, when he can convince himself that it's HIS idea to.