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Open Bar: Funnier Than White People Practicing Voodoo

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, June 09, 2014, 03:18:31 PM

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Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.

Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 03, 2014, 10:38:58 PM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on July 03, 2014, 04:06:14 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 03, 2014, 01:04:38 PM
Foster kid is stealing from housemates, staying up all night drunk, leaving my studio door open, and generally being a liability. I am about at the end of my rope and considering sending her on her way, which sucks.

Is this Surprise!Daughter or someone else?

Surprise Daughter. It's a clusterfuck. :(

I am sorry this is the case. :( That is super shitty.
Weevil-Infested Badfun Wrongsex Referee From The 9th Earth
Slick and Deranged Wombat of Manhood Questioning
Hulking Dormouse of Lust and DESPAIR™
Gatling Geyser of Rainbow AIDS

"The only way we can ever change anything is to look in the mirror and find no enemy." - Akala  'Find No Enemy'.

Junkenstein

Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 03, 2014, 07:00:19 PM
If the situation becomes too dire, you can always shove the cat down the front of your pants.

No, Seriously, how bad does a situation have to be exactly before applying a cat to your genitals improves shit?



Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Suu

Quote from: Junkenstein on July 04, 2014, 12:16:35 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 03, 2014, 07:00:19 PM
If the situation becomes too dire, you can always shove the cat down the front of your pants.

No, Seriously, how bad does a situation have to be exactly before applying a cat to your genitals improves shit?

Clearly, you've never been to Singapore.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

minuspace

Quote from: Junkenstein on July 04, 2014, 12:16:35 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 03, 2014, 07:00:19 PM
If the situation becomes too dire, you can always shove the cat down the front of your pants.

No, Seriously, how bad does a situation have to be exactly before applying a cat to your genitals improves shit?
When the duct tape fails :lulz:

Luna

Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on July 04, 2014, 12:12:28 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 03, 2014, 10:38:58 PM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on July 03, 2014, 04:06:14 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 03, 2014, 01:04:38 PM
Foster kid is stealing from housemates, staying up all night drunk, leaving my studio door open, and generally being a liability. I am about at the end of my rope and considering sending her on her way, which sucks.

Is this Surprise!Daughter or someone else?

Surprise Daughter. It's a clusterfuck. :(

I am sorry this is the case. :( That is super shitty.

Sorry, Nigel, that sucks a lot.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Suu

Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

minuspace

Okay, so some Swedes in my hood think it's okay to fly two of their flags over each other... Still, tonight...  I mean, one (1), that could just be oversight.  Two is just taking the piss.  Suggestions welcome?

ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

Quote from: LuciferX on July 04, 2014, 03:51:13 AM
Okay, so some Swedes in my hood think it's okay to fly two of their flags over each other... Still, tonight...  I mean, one (1), that could just be oversight.  Two is just taking the piss.  Suggestions welcome?

Knock on their door and say:

"Hello, I'm so-and-so and live in the neighborhood. I was just wondering why you're flying two flags over each other."
P E R   A S P E R A   A D   A S T R A

minuspace

Quote from: Net (+1 Hidden) and 5 guests on July 04, 2014, 04:02:19 AM
Quote from: LuciferX on July 04, 2014, 03:51:13 AM
Okay, so some Swedes in my hood think it's okay to fly two of their flags over each other... Still, tonight...  I mean, one (1), that could just be oversight.  Two is just taking the piss.  Suggestions welcome?

Knock on their door and say:

"Hello, I'm so-and-so and live in the neighborhood. I was just wondering why you're flying two flags over each other."
Idiot.

Suu

Apparently Arizona got a haboob today.


I could be incredibly witty and say it was payback for the hurricane and the tornadoes and the what the fuck thunderstorms that New Hampshire is getting, but really, I just wanted to say haboob.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

LMNO


Suu

Haboob.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:

It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Suu

This reminds me, I need to get margarita mix. You cannot in good faith have a hurricane come within a couple hundred miles without drinking margaritas. It's bad luck.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: The Suu on July 04, 2014, 04:28:49 AM
Apparently Arizona got a haboob today.


I could be incredibly witty and say it was payback for the hurricane and the tornadoes and the what the fuck thunderstorms that New Hampshire is getting, but really, I just wanted to say haboob.

Tucson got fucking HAMMERED.  My interbutts just now came back.  It took me 15 minutes to drive 4 miles
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: The Suu on July 04, 2014, 04:50:14 AM
Haboob.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:

It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.