Open Bar: Funnier Than White People Practicing Voodoo

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LIFE - CONTINUE!

[Aucoq]

Holy shit that's scary, Roger.  I'm glad to hear it wasn't a stroke though.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

GAH! PEOPLE! PLEASE STOP ALMOST DYING!

My father is 71, and has been in ill health for several years.  So, yeah.

Keelin took the evening shift with him, so I could go stir shit, but I'm heading back to the hospital in about an hour.

 

[Junkenstein]

GAH! PEOPLE! PLEASE STOP ALMOST DYING!

This. Take care you horrible bastards.

[Luna]

Haboob.

 

It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

I can't imagine why, when thinking about pounds of sanded coyote shit flinging itself at my windshield, my first thought was NOT "oh, I gotta go THERE."

The best part is that a haboob is not an instantaneous event.  It's more like someone aimed a sandblaster into a sandbox.  It lasts however long it lasts.

I think I was in one, once. Around 1994. It sucked, because we couldn't DRIVE.

Sure you can.  Only lesser wimps need to SEE to DRIVE.

In other news, I spent all day in the hospital with my father, who woke up this morning and then forgot how to read, write, speak, or see anything to his right.  By the time I got to his house, he had speech back, and didn't want to go to the hospital because he felt fine.

I pointed out that the part of him making the decision was the part that was in question, so he went.

By the time they'd CT'd him and were getting him ready for the MRI, he had regained all of his faculties, including his judgement (and was glad my mother and I made him go in). 

The good news is, this wasn't a stroke, it was something called a "TIA" which is sort of like a warning shot.  He'll be in the hospital at least one more day. 

Bullet dodged.

Yikes!  Glad to hear it wasn't as bad as it could have been, and glad you and your mom talked him into going in.  That's scary shit.

[Suu]

GAH! PEOPLE! PLEASE STOP ALMOST DYING!

My father is 71, and has been in ill health for several years.  So, yeah.

Keelin took the evening shift with him, so I could go stir shit, but I'm heading back to the hospital in about an hour.

 

But he's a fucking awesome gent, he is. I love reading his snarky comments on FB.

[Lenin McCarthy]

I'm changing old people's diapers for a living this summer. They're evil. But hey, it's work.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Haboob.

 

It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

I can't imagine why, when thinking about pounds of sanded coyote shit flinging itself at my windshield, my first thought was NOT "oh, I gotta go THERE."

The best part is that a haboob is not an instantaneous event.  It's more like someone aimed a sandblaster into a sandbox.  It lasts however long it lasts.

I think I was in one, once. Around 1994. It sucked, because we couldn't DRIVE.

Sure you can.  Only lesser wimps need to SEE to DRIVE.

In other news, I spent all day in the hospital with my father, who woke up this morning and then forgot how to read, write, speak, or see anything to his right.  By the time I got to his house, he had speech back, and didn't want to go to the hospital because he felt fine.

I pointed out that the part of him making the decision was the part that was in question, so he went.

By the time they'd CT'd him and were getting him ready for the MRI, he had regained all of his faculties, including his judgement (and was glad my mother and I made him go in). 

The good news is, this wasn't a stroke, it was something called a "TIA" which is sort of like a warning shot.  He'll be in the hospital at least one more day. 

Bullet dodged.

We were Portlanders, which is probably synonymous with "wimp". We get scared when the sun is too bright.

Sorry to hear about your dad, but glad it wasn't the real thing, this time.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hung out with Rude last night, first time in a while I've really gotten to spend time with him. Sometimes I forget how much I just completely love that man. I don't know if it's pheromonal or what, I just absolutely, viscerally adore him. I probably get a huge rush of dopamine just from seeing him. He showed up and I was all, OH YEAH, THAT! SQUEEEE!!!!

Had a GF like that.  30 years later, the sight of her still does all manner of rotten shit to the inside of my skull.

We're good friends, so it's all good. And then I hung out with his almost-ex-wife last night (they've been separated for five years but finally filed for divorce a few months ago).

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

So this Neuroeconomics class that looked so interesting is, so far, basically bullshit pseudoscience and witchcraft.

[xXRon_Paul_42016Xxx(weed)]

So this Neuroeconomics class that looked so interesting is, so far, basically bullshit pseudoscience and witchcraft.

I havent watched past week 1. When does he start talking about quantum magic brains?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

So this Neuroeconomics class that looked so interesting is, so far, basically bullshit pseudoscience and witchcraft.

I havent watched past week 1. When does he start talking about quantum magic brains?

He starts tossing "quantumz" around in week 2, and it looks like from here on out it's going to be "parts of the brain light up".

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

He's also just the worst lecturer ever. Ever. His soothing monotone is almost impossible to listen to, and his quizzes are TERRIBLE.

[xXRon_Paul_42016Xxx(weed)]

He's also just the worst lecturer ever. Ever. His soothing monotone is almost impossible to listen to, and his quizzes are TERRIBLE.

His facial expressions are the best too. If you showed me this without the sound I would assume it was a Tim and Eric sketch.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

He's also just the worst lecturer ever. Ever. His soothing monotone is almost impossible to listen to, and his quizzes are TERRIBLE.

His facial expressions are the best too. If you showed me this without the sound I would assume it was a Tim and Eric sketch.

My boyfriend commented that he looks like Lil Bub.