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My Girl Friday

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, June 25, 2014, 02:22:03 PM

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LMNO

#75
July 02, 2014, 11:44:21 AM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on July 02, 2014, 07:38:56 AM

We need a volunteer member from the audience.


Fixed!

The Good Reverend Roger

#76
July 02, 2014, 02:36:22 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 02, 2014, 07:06:45 AM
Whoa, this is complicated... and interesting. Bill Gates? Man out of time, unless there's something really interesting going on here with compression of time and retrospective hallucination?

You'll see.

TGRR,
Smug bastard
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#77
July 02, 2014, 03:39:05 PM
Got a great episode today.  Just waiting for the coffee to kick in.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

LMNO

#78
July 02, 2014, 03:58:13 PM
 :banana:

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#79
July 02, 2014, 04:07:40 PM
Woo!

I'm still adjusting to me new weird "civilized" daytime schedule, but if I miss it when you post I'll be back by 4-ish.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.

#80
July 02, 2014, 04:50:59 PM
Weevil-Infested Badfun Wrongsex Referee From The 9th Earth
Slick and Deranged Wombat of Manhood Questioning
Hulking Dormouse of Lust and DESPAIR™
Gatling Geyser of Rainbow AIDS

"The only way we can ever change anything is to look in the mirror and find no enemy." - Akala  'Find No Enemy'.

The Good Reverend Roger

#81
July 02, 2014, 06:25:05 PM
Part 8

SCENE:  Hamish's office.  Hamish is snoring at his desk. 

The closet door opens quietly, and Friday walks out.  She has that small smile on her face, the one that makes your spine try to crawl into your skull.  She is wearing a man's suit, with tie, and a fedora.  She puts her finger to her lips.  Be quiet.  Hamish is actually sleeping for once.

We go out into the hall with her.  She walks to the outside door, and turns.  "Would you like to hear a story while I work?"

Sure, Friday, how bad could it be?

"Well, there was this guy, see, and his name at birth was Jack.  That's not his name now, but that isn't important, at least not yet."

We walk down the street, toward the City Center.

"Jack was a wild one and a weird one.  He was in fact nicknamed "Unnatural Jack" by age 19.  His squaddies called him this, because he would commit all manner of violent acts with a look of perfect serenity on his face.  He did well in the service, and was occasionally seconded to various agencies with disturbing acronyms for names, because he was good at what he did, and he didn't seem to care much.  No matter how hideous things got, he always smiled.  Like he was somewhere else.  Sitting on the back porch with a beer on a warm summer evening, maybe."

We cross congress street with Friday, and then begin across the plaza to the City Center building itself.

"Jack did this for a good number of years.  As he aged, though, he started to slow down a bit.  By the time he was 30, he'd decided that he needed a new line of work.  Needless to say, certain people were disturbed by the idea of him running loose.  You might even say 'alarmed'.  In any case, they decided that it would be better if his retirement was more...permanent."

She stops at the door, which is locked.  This door is never locked.  "Forgive the interruption", she says, smiling that small smile of hers.  Fantasically, she seems to sprout a greenish fire from head to toe.  She walks into the glass, which melts away, and into the building proper.  We follow.  Something horrible is about to happen, but this is a nightmare after all, so we have to follow.  It's how nightmares work.

She walks down the hallway, the green fire no longer in evidence.

"So anyway, they made three attempts to kill Jack.  None of the attempts succeeded, and none of the assassins survived.  And then Jack disappeared."

We are walking up to the police desk.  Sergeant Ahmad is staring at Friday, goggle-eyed.  She is giving him that "I'm JUST a little girl" smile.  The one we fear the way we fear her fashion sense.  Sergeant Ahmad pulls his gun from its holster with a shaking hand.  He fires 6 shots into Friday at point blank range.  We see the bullets come out of her back.

"What they don't know", she continues, while advancing on Ahmad, who is frantically trying to reload, "Is that he changed his name to something else entirely, and faded away like the Chesire cat, leaving nothing but the horrible memory of that serene smile."

She grabs Ahmad by the neck and lifts him into the air with one hand.  A shake, a snapping noise.  Ahmad falls to the ground like a sack of potatoes, and does not move.  His head is at a gruesome angle to the rest of his body.  Friday turns, and begins back the way she came.  We walk back out of the hole in the glass, and across the plaza toward Congress Street, and Hamish's office.

"He's still out there, you know", she says at length, as we enter Hamish's building, and head up the stairs and into his office.  Friday walks back to her closet.  She stops by the door and smiles at us.  We want to scream.

"He's still out there, living in normal society.  His neighbors think he's just the quiet type.  Polite, always.  Keeps his house and yard in good order.  Never any trouble.  Always has a peaceable smile for everyone.  He could even be YOUR neighbor, you know? Isn't that the funniest thing you've ever heard?"

The closet door closes.

(to be continued)



" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Q. G. Pennyworth

#82
July 02, 2014, 07:21:19 PM
F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5

The Good Reverend Roger

#83
July 02, 2014, 07:25:32 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on July 02, 2014, 07:21:19 PM
F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5

I don't know if I'll get any more done today, I'm pretty beat.

But for certain tomorrow.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Q. G. Pennyworth

#84
July 02, 2014, 07:27:30 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on July 02, 2014, 07:25:32 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on July 02, 2014, 07:21:19 PM
F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5

I don't know if I'll get any more done today, I'm pretty beat.

But for certain tomorrow.

Yeah, don't push yourself or anything. This is fkn amazing and nobody wants you to crap out.

LMNO

#85
July 02, 2014, 07:32:50 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on July 02, 2014, 07:21:19 PM
F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5F5


This perfectly sums up my reaction, as well.

Luna

#86
July 02, 2014, 10:55:48 PM
Excuse me.  I'm going to go shut myself in the clos...  Um, no, not the closet, shit.

Hide under the bed?  There's nothing under there, right?
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

The Good Reverend Roger

#87
July 02, 2014, 10:56:40 PM
Quote from: Luna on July 02, 2014, 10:55:48 PM
Excuse me.  I'm going to go shut myself in the clos...  Um, no, not the closet, shit.

Hide under the bed?  There's nothing under there, right?

:lulz:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#88
July 02, 2014, 11:19:03 PM
Wow, this is goddamn amazing.

I have my suspicions about what's happening, but I'm not about to speculate out loud.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#89
July 03, 2014, 02:52:11 AM
For those of you who want to know what Friday looks like, this is Lauren Rae, the young lady who is also - alongside Jenn - helping to write this:

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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