Am i being an independent thinker or just a coward?

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

I have been fat for pretty much my whole life. It is only recently that i've discovered that i suffer from hypothyroidism, which is a dearth of the hormone that regulates metabolism. basically this makes it a bitch and a half to lose weight, even after the damn thyroid pills have been slowly ratcheted up to an appropriate level. Diabetes runs in my family, and being overweight doesn't help obviously. i'm on my parents insurance, and my sister is pressuring me to undergo some kind of bariatric surgery (gastric sleeve, bypass, lap band etc.) She has had lap band and sleeve procedures before, and lost some weight with it, but is still a bit overweight because she doesn't strictly follow the rules around having that kind of thing. For myself, i know that i'm staring down the barrel of diabetes, i know that I am probably being held back from some of the things i want in life (jobs, dating, longer life span, etc.) but I have reservations about going through with it. Namely, there the fear that i'll go through with this, and still have the same depression problems as before, or like in my sister's case, that it wont work and that i'll still be big even after this whole ordeal.
Another is that i'll be doing this not for myself, but for my family. they've been telling me for years that they're worried and scared about what my life will turn out to be, so i dunno if i'm doing this because i'm scared of being fat, or because they've been scaring me with it for so long.
For years i've just been trying to feel comfortable in my own skin, in the hopes that if I deal with the depression part first, the weight loss can happen more easily. But i'm also lazy as shit, and these days i dont have a regular convenient time to work out and rarely have the energy to motivate myself to do it in any case. so yea, the surgery might be a tool to help me deal with this, but on the other hand, isnt going into this like its a magical weight loss surgery that makes me thin without work the wrong mindset? I have flip flopped on one side to the other on this question, so i'd like some input, am i standing up for something personal, or am i just being a coward?

[Doktor Howl]

1.  Working out is not a matter of convenience, or you won't stick with it.  It has to be scheduled as regularly as work.

2.  You are correct in one thing:  Stop worrying about the weight.  Tell your family to get off your back.  THEN try managing it.

3.  Nigel and I ran a thread on weight loss, up in the food section.  There's plenty of good ideas throughout that thread, from many different people.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

What he said.

And also, don't consider surgery until you've been on thyroid meds for a year. Your energy levels should change significantly as the meds help you shake off the lethargy that comes with hypothyroidism.

The best changes you can make for your health will be gradual, not extreme. I don't know what your diet is like, but if it's poor, start introducing healthy foods. I recommend not eliminating what you "shouldn't" have, so much as gradually incorporating more of what you "should". As you add calories from nutrient-dense food, they tend to displace calories from nutrient-poor foods.

The other thing is to add exercise in easy-to-handle chunks. Don't start with "I'm going to the gym and pumping iron", start with "I'm going for a 15-minute walk". That walk can gradually expand to be an hour walk (especially if you play Ingress, boy howdy!) and from there can turn into hiking or swimming or going to the gym. Exercise creates more energy, but you have to start somewhere.

In other words, start by GOING OUTSIDE. Even if for just a walk around the block every night.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I am in no way qualified here, but I would like to echo the opinion that surgery should be treated as an emergency option. As you know, there are risks involved that may outweigh the benefits.

[Reginald Ret]

The medication is a great step forward.

Howl and Nigel bring great points to the table. Allow me to repeat them in slightly different words.

Regarding food: Eat more good stuff instead of focusing on eating less bad stuff. This is slightly complicated by the fact that good things in increasing amounts slowly lose their goodness and gain some badness. Variety can get you out of that pitfall (also, it keeps food fun).

Exercise is not a bad thing, it can best be defined as any movement you like.
Going outside is the most accesible version of movement you like. The added benefits of going outside are:
- Increased sunlight exposure, humans need sunlight on their skin.
- Increased light social interaction, this is good for most people because humans are social animals.
- Interesting and varied context, personally I believe the shapes and movements found in plants moving in the wind are very good for your brain. Other than that, cabin fever is a real thing, try to avoid it.
Movement does not have to be strenuous, if it doesn't hurt you are probably still doing it right.
Seriously, any and all movement is good for you (except trying to move at or near the speed of light, that does horrible things to your body), even falling over and rolling down a hill with pillows tied to your body so you won't get bruised.

The thread that has been mentioned is here.

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

I am in no way qualified here, but I would like to echo the opinion that surgery should be treated as an emergency option. As you know, there are risks involved that may outweigh the benefits.

Well, i am prediabetic, I think my sister means well by trying to help me avoid that altogether(tho, how fucked up is it that i dread hearing my family's "i told you so's"  more than an actual serious medical condition.) what irks me is that anytime she advocates for this there's this frustrated tone of like "CMON, get the fucking sleeve already you KNOW you're never gonna drop all that weight yourself!" which makes it really hard to pick myself up and try again.

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

What he said.

And also, don't consider surgery until you've been on thyroid meds for a year. Your energy levels should change significantly as the meds help you shake off the lethargy that comes with hypothyroidism.

The best changes you can make for your health will be gradual, not extreme. I don't know what your diet is like, but if it's poor, start introducing healthy foods. I recommend not eliminating what you "shouldn't" have, so much as gradually incorporating more of what you "should". As you add calories from nutrient-dense food, they tend to displace calories from nutrient-poor foods.

The other thing is to add exercise in easy-to-handle chunks. Don't start with "I'm going to the gym and pumping iron", start with "I'm going for a 15-minute walk". That walk can gradually expand to be an hour walk (especially if you play Ingress, boy howdy!) and from there can turn into hiking or swimming or going to the gym. Exercise creates more energy, but you have to start somewhere.

In other words, start by GOING OUTSIDE. Even if for just a walk around the block every night.

well i have been on the thyroid medication for a number of years now, and i only have two more years of being on my parents medical plan to consider doing this at all. I know it makes sense to start small, but it always seems like whenever i get it into my head to start working out, either i hit it so hard that i burn out or get injured almost immediately(at which point fuck that noise wheres the chili fries), or someone points out the lack of immediate results i've had over two weeks or whatever and immediately starts bombarding me with unsolicited advice that is the exact opposite of everything i'm doing, or that requires a shitload of time or money i dont have.

Also i just saw that thread about ingress and HOLY shit that seems perfect. I even have a suitably nerdy friend who enjoys walking i could play with! I also used to be really into doing those Just Dance Games for Kinect.

[Reginald Ret]

What he said.

And also, don't consider surgery until you've been on thyroid meds for a year. Your energy levels should change significantly as the meds help you shake off the lethargy that comes with hypothyroidism.

The best changes you can make for your health will be gradual, not extreme. I don't know what your diet is like, but if it's poor, start introducing healthy foods. I recommend not eliminating what you "shouldn't" have, so much as gradually incorporating more of what you "should". As you add calories from nutrient-dense food, they tend to displace calories from nutrient-poor foods.

The other thing is to add exercise in easy-to-handle chunks. Don't start with "I'm going to the gym and pumping iron", start with "I'm going for a 15-minute walk". That walk can gradually expand to be an hour walk (especially if you play Ingress, boy howdy!) and from there can turn into hiking or swimming or going to the gym. Exercise creates more energy, but you have to start somewhere.

In other words, start by GOING OUTSIDE. Even if for just a walk around the block every night.

well i have been on the thyroid medication for a number of years now, and i only have two more years of being on my parents medical plan to consider doing this at all. I know it makes sense to start small, but it always seems like whenever i get it into my head to start working out, either i hit it so hard that i burn out or get injured almost immediately(at which point fuck that noise wheres the chili fries), or someone points out the lack of immediate results i've had over two weeks or whatever and immediately starts bombarding me with unsolicited advice that is the exact opposite of everything i'm doing, or that requires a shitload of time or money i dont have.

Also i just saw that thread about ingress and HOLY shit that seems perfect. I even have a suitably nerdy friend who enjoys walking i could play with! I also used to be really into doing those Just Dance Games for Kinect.

As a curmudgeonly negative pessimistic bastard I can tell you that smiling is exhausting.
Your desire for weight loss can best be achieved by doing as much of that fun stuff as possible, smile until it hurts!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

well i have been on the thyroid medication for a number of years now, and i only have two more years of being on my parents medical plan to consider doing this at all. I know it makes sense to start small, but it always seems like whenever i get it into my head to start working out, either i hit it so hard that i burn out or get injured almost immediately(at which point fuck that noise wheres the chili fries), or someone points out the lack of immediate results i've had over two weeks or whatever and immediately starts bombarding me with unsolicited advice that is the exact opposite of everything i'm doing, or that requires a shitload of time or money i dont have.

Also i just saw that thread about ingress and HOLY shit that seems perfect. I even have a suitably nerdy friend who enjoys walking i could play with! I also used to be really into doing those Just Dance Games for Kinect.

Ingress is RAD. I seriously walk so much more (partly because I have classes on campuses a mile apart but still) and I have so much fun doing it! it is, like any good video game, kind of addictive, but in a way that gets you outside and moving, which is the best.

If I can offer a suggestion regarding your well-intentioned advice-givers: don't tell them. It took me DECADES to figure this out. People fucking love to give unhelpful, uninformed, unsolicited advice, and it pushes my buttons like a motherfucker. The only way I've figured out to avoid it driving me up a wall (besides the help of certain understanding friends who openly mock the giving of unsolicited advice and make me laugh) is to not widely disclose my activities or frustrations.

If they don't know, they can't undermine you.

Since you have already been on meds for a couple of years, I guess my best suggestion is to try taking a daily walk (perhaps just playing Ingress will do it, my boyfriend lost about eight pounds last month without trying just by playing) and adding a few healthy meals a week for six months. You won't see results within a few weeks, but after six months you should. If not, maybe give more thought to the lap band while you still have insurance.

[Doktor Howl]

People fucking love to give unhelpful, uninformed, unsolicited advice, and it pushes my buttons like a motherfucker.

You should just tell them to stop.

[Doktor Howl]

 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

People fucking love to give unhelpful, uninformed, unsolicited advice, and it pushes my buttons like a motherfucker.

You should just tell them to stop.

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

well i have been on the thyroid medication for a number of years now, and i only have two more years of being on my parents medical plan to consider doing this at all. I know it makes sense to start small, but it always seems like whenever i get it into my head to start working out, either i hit it so hard that i burn out or get injured almost immediately(at which point fuck that noise wheres the chili fries), or someone points out the lack of immediate results i've had over two weeks or whatever and immediately starts bombarding me with unsolicited advice that is the exact opposite of everything i'm doing, or that requires a shitload of time or money i dont have.

Also i just saw that thread about ingress and HOLY shit that seems perfect. I even have a suitably nerdy friend who enjoys walking i could play with! I also used to be really into doing those Just Dance Games for Kinect.

Ingress is RAD. I seriously walk so much more (partly because I have classes on campuses a mile apart but still) and I have so much fun doing it! it is, like any good video game, kind of addictive, but in a way that gets you outside and moving, which is the best.

If I can offer a suggestion regarding your well-intentioned advice-givers: don't tell them. It took me DECADES to figure this out. People fucking love to give unhelpful, uninformed, unsolicited advice, and it pushes my buttons like a motherfucker. The only way I've figured out to avoid it driving me up a wall (besides the help of certain understanding friends who openly mock the giving of unsolicited advice and make me laugh) is to not widely disclose my activities or frustrations.

If they don't know, they can't undermine you.

Since you have already been on meds for a couple of years, I guess my best suggestion is to try taking a daily walk (perhaps just playing Ingress will do it, my boyfriend lost about eight pounds last month without trying just by playing) and adding a few healthy meals a week for six months. You won't see results within a few weeks, but after six months you should. If not, maybe give more thought to the lap band while you still have insurance.

Started playing Ingress. It has proven effective in getting me off my ass to walk around my neighborhood/place of work for at least 15 -30 minutes at a time. We'll see how long i can keep it up.

As for the surgery part, I've had periods of sustained healthy eating and periods of sustained regular exercise( i once trained for six months to win Kung Fu tournament, which i did BTW) but i've never really done both those things at the same time. Either i start eating  well or hitting the gym but never both. Which kinda makes me think that the surgery is something i need. like if i have the lap band to control my intake, i can focus on regular exercise i guess? But yea, then it feels like i'm either cutting myself up to avoid controlling myself, or to please my family or to be attractive to women. What I Want VS What Other People Want is all mixed up.

[P3nT4gR4m]

Best advice I have:

Set your sights on someone you want to be. Not what you look like, you can't be the same person you are and look different because it's who you are and how you live that determines your physical condition more than anything else. Maybe you want to be a football player or a mountaineer or a skateboarder or a cyclist or whatever. The mind and body are interlinked in a lot of respects. You can change one without changing the other but it's not generally sustainable.

Bad news - you want to be a thin, athletic person with killer abs who lounges about the sofa all day watching teevee and eating cheetos? Not going to happen.

Hitting the gym, changing your eating habits, playing ingress... these are all good things and will help short term. All I'm saying is that if you don't have a long term goal, like "I want to spend my life hiking around the wilderness or surfing or something, rather than doing whatever the fuck it was that got me into this predicament in the first place", you're likely to experience short term results.

[rong]

Just throwing this out there - getting more exercise will burn more calories and make you hungrier.  Having surgery to prevent you from taking in too much food might make you feel too tired to exercise.

I think committing to drinking a large glass of water before every meal will help prevent any over eating without starving yourself in the process.

Also, muscle burns calories *all the time* so if you focus on building more muscle, I think you will see results more soonly.

I don't even play a doctor on TV, but I think I make sense.

Good luck.