PD Monster Stats: Statblocks

[President Television]

This thread is meant to run in tandem with this one, and it's where we're actually posting our statblocks and such. You know, the finished products(and works-in-progress, if need be). I'll be reposting the list from there, and once there are some more posts in this thread I'll start putting up links to them in the OP for ease of navigation. This thread's just for stats; actual discussion goes in the other thread.

EDIT: The lists are here.

Deities:
Eris Kallisti Discordia
J.R. "Bob" Dobbs
JHVH-1
NHGH
The Machine
The Skinsaw Queen(Little Orange Breaks Bad)
Payne, the Messiah

Monsters:
Atlantean Yetis
Dero
Spiders(Hey Jim!)
Upside-Down People(various ramblings of TGRR)
Nessies(More Futuristic Fun Than You Really Wanted)
Giant Mutant Guinea Worms(various ramblings of TGRR)

Afflictions
The Curse of Necronomicoin(A New Currency, not yet approved)
Mutant Guinea Worms(various ramblings of TGRR)
The Spore of the Desert(TGRR and Nigel, conceptual)

Classes, etc.
Rinzai Monk(Chaotic monk archetype, mainly for Nopants, Source: Parable of the Gong)
Zenarchist Swordsman(probably some ToB-style wankery)
Battle Nun(goddamn essential)
Yeti-blooded(Subgenius sorcerer bloodline)

[President Television]

Eris Kallisti Discordia
Deep in the shadows of decent society lurks the secretive church of Discordia. These inscrutable cultists spend long hours crowing on about the coming of "the Strange Times" to anyone who will listen, assaulting their senses with hoarse spittle-filled braying and their intelligence with innumerable logical fallacies. They sing praise to Eris, a hideous crone of a goddess who starts wars for the fun of it and cackles as she wades in the blood of battlefields. Yet there may be more to this contrarian band of maniacs than there appears; it is said that the more you know of the Discordian scripture, the less you understand. Fortunately, these cretins seem to have a vested interest in keeping their membership down to a bare minimum.

Portfolio: Strife, Discord, Conflict, Confusion
Holy Symbol: Two overlapping arrows, forming a six-pointed figure.
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Domains: Chaos, Madness, Trickery, War
Subdomains: Whimsy, Insanity, Deception, Blood
Inquisitions: Anger, Conversion, Heresy, Vengeance, Sin
Mysteries: Apocalypse, Battle, Occult

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I like it!

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

Yeti Bloodline is done. Never written a bloodline before, hope this isnt too broken/underpowered/etc.

Yeti- bloodline
One of your ancestors was lucky enough to brave the icy mountain peaks, copulate with the wild ice dwelling ape-giants that live there, and live to tell the tale. Whether brave ambassador to the distant tribes, or unwilling conquest of a raiding yeti exile, one thing is certain: someone in your family fucked a yeti, and here are your superpowers. Enjoy!
Class skill: Survival
Bonus Spells:  Bull's Strength (3rd), Fire Shield (chill only) (5th), Rage (7th), Ice storm (9th), Cone of Cold (11th), Cold Ice Strike(13th), Ice body(15th), Frightful Aspect(17th),  Polar Midnight(19th).
Bonus Feats: Aspect of the Beast, Combat Casting, Diehard, Endurance, Weapon Focus (natural weapon), Cleave, Great Fortitude, Power Attack, Skill Focus (climb), Toughness
Bloodline Arcana: When you cast a spell with the cold descriptor against a creature, increase the DC by 2.
Bloodline Powers:
Freezing Touch: Starting at 1st level, you can make a melee touch attack as a standard action that inflicts 1d6 points of ice damage + 1 for every two sorcerer levels you possess and staggers the target for 1 round. You can use this ability a number of times per day equal to 3 + your Charisma modifier.
Icewalker (Ex): At 3rd level, you gain resist cold 5 and can move across snow and icy surfaces without penalty and without leaving tracks. At 9th level, you gain resist cold 10 and can climb icy surfaces as if using spider climb.
Yeti's Strength (Sp): At 9th level, you gain a +2 inherent bonus to Strength. This bonus increases to +4 at 13th level and to 6 at 17th level.
Power of Giants (Sp): At 15th level, you may grow to Large size as a standard action. At this size you gain a +6 size bonus to Strength, a –2 penalty to Dexterity, a +4 size bonus to Constitution, and a +4 natural armor bonus. You may return to your normal size as a standard action. You may remain in this size for up to 1 minute per character level per day; this duration does not need to be consecutive, but it must be used in 1 minute increments.
Abominable Snowman (Su): At 20th level, you become the mountain dwelling ice demon of legend. You gain immunity to cold and DR 5/—. Once per day, you can cast transformation as a spell-like ability using your sorcerer level as your caster level.

[President Television]

Mechanically: This falls under the general purview of other melee-focused bloodlines like the Abyssal bloodline: Not great for most sorcerers, but with a little tweaking it could be awesome for a bloodrager. Personally, I'm not a big fan of the cold elemental focus since all those cold spells are useless against anything that resists it, but by default Pathfinder Yetis have two things going for them: Strength and cold. It was inevitable. One genuine criticism I have to make is that the spell levels for your bloodline spells are off. I think the idea for bloodline spells is that you get your bonus spell at the level you get to cast spells of its level, so it should be a straightforward progression of levels 1-9. The Bloodline Arcana is pretty sweet, though. There are some nice cold spells out there. Here are the bloodline spells I'd go with: Enlarge Person (3rd), Frigid Touch (5th), Wind Wall (7th), Protection from Energy(cold only) (9th), Icy Prison (11th), Stone Tell (13th), Ice body(15th), Frightful Aspect(17th),  Polar Midnight(19th).


This works for regular Pathfinder Yetis, but I was thinking more of the Subgenius "Slack-Master Rulers of Atlantis" take on Yetis. I always figured Yeti-blooded sorcerers would have more luck-based powers, since Subgenii are supposed to be human-Yeti hybrids. I'll try my hand at putting together a bloodline from the opposite perspective, based purely on the premise of Slack sorcery, and maybe we can combine our approaches or something.

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

sure a synthesis would be nice