Dispatch from Asshat #1 - Christmas Lights

[Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy]

They might expect that. I was thinking of stealing the steering wheel from their car, instead.

Or jack the car up, put it on blocks just enough so the tires are off the ground.  They get in the car, sart it, put it in gear and do a Curly, it tried to go but nothing happened.

[Wishfarple]

They might expect that. I was thinking of stealing the steering wheel from their car, instead.

When they finally take down their (your) lights, sneak over in the middle of the night and put up new ones.  Keep this up nightly until your interest or budget wanes.

[sakredchao]

christmaslights suck..  

firelitos and luminarios are where it's at.

kim

[agent compassion]

Hang donuts from their fence when they're not home.

[Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy]

Hang donuts from their fence when they're not home.

I saw something the other day, I think it was things to put on lights.  It was Jack from A Nightmare Before Christmas.  Except at my house, it is called, Jack the Pumpkin King.  But putting up lights like that would be funny.  Or replace their porch light with a black light or red light.

[agent compassion]

r replace their porch light with a black light or red light.

Red light? BAHAHAHAA!

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

But I get sick of hearing about how the Xtians stole this-and-that. No one stole shit. Things just changed with the times.

Aye, but what gets my goat is when they turn around and attack us "heathens" for doing the same things they're doing because we're not doing them with a "Jesus Seal of Approval" or something....they don't acknowledge that they borrowed/incorporated these things from other paths. It's like they think that there was a fuckin' Christmas tree in the manger with Jesus or something....hello, ever heard of a little thing called history? Be nice!

Ah, fuck 'em anyway, who needs Christianity? That religion is the ultimate mindfuck I swear.

Ah, fuck 'em! A good few dead snakes hanging on the front door will keep them Jesus freako-hippie-nuts away.

I dunno. No Xtian ever attacked me, well....not many. I seem to be very persuasive and have converted a few of them....so they give me a wide berth.