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UK General Election 8th June: Shake it all about?

Started by Vanadium Gryllz, February 23, 2016, 02:54:34 PM

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P3nT4gR4m

Quote from: Junkenstein on April 19, 2017, 12:25:48 PM
If it's any consolation, probably less than you may think.

Why be sneaky when you can just wait 8 weeks and get applauded for the exact same shit?

Anyone making predictions for the coming of Austerity 3.0? I'm guessing the NHS sold wholesale to US firms to begin with. They're already talking about selling the RBS stake "at a loss". I assume that will get sold to the usual suspects. Crapita and G4S are probably in line for some very tasty contracts in the near future too, as usual.

I expect Austerity 3.0 will be fairly - final solution. The rest depends what they're planning on doing with this island. Could be a manufacturing base, could be a tax haven, maybe a weapons platform. Here's the thing, unless they plump for a longpig hunting reserve, none of the options require anything like 64million-odd well fed primates. They used to need the working class, now they're just a drain on resources. Pretty soon they'll be an eyesore and that's when the cleanup crews arrive.

Dumb fucks will be begging for it, even as they're being shovelled into gas chambers. I'll be too busy laughing at them to have any sympathy. Or, hey, maybe I'm wrong and the future isn't going to happen here, in which case it'll be even funnier to watch everything revert to the stone age while everybody starves to death.

Remember back when that stinking dead cunt thatcher had to deal with millions of unemployed back in the 80's? Police state? Ghettos? These new tories will soon have a lot more than a paltry couple of million on their plate. This does not end well for the masses. At this point, as far as I'm concerned, they deserve it.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Junkenstein

Oh it's much funnier than that.

Taking Unemployment as an example, how do you get this down to record lows? Well to start with, you close all the job centres you can. People still need to turn up in person to a job centre that is now 20+ miles away in order to claim benefits. Can't afford to travel there? Well that's a sanction (read - Penalty charge) for you and removal of any/all remaining benefits. You're not entitled to any support and you no longer factor into unemployed statistics as you've been kicked off it and are just a lazy parasite, not someone who's in a terminally fucked situation. Catch 22 had nothing on the kinds of statistical manipulation you'll be seeing over the next couple of years.

The end result here is going to be social unrest on a national scale. Food riots are a very strong possibility at the moment. The main question is where and when. I wouldn't rule out seeing a few affluent people killed and cannibalised at this rate. Hell, this should probably happen anyway just to send the appropriate message to the rest of the job creators.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Junkenstein

Quote from: Faust on April 19, 2017, 12:44:16 PM
The RBS thing gives me a bit of schadenfreude, over the last few months there have been a contingent pushing that Ireland should rejoin the commonwealth and that as a Independent nation state we had a failed banking sector because we had to nationalise AIB by 96%, the states stake is going up for IPO in the next few months, expecting a profit of about 30% on it.

That's worth watching. I'd expect that 30% to be slowly eroded down to fuck all as the IPO date approaches.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

P3nT4gR4m

Quote from: Junkenstein on April 19, 2017, 01:07:05 PM
Oh it's much funnier than that.

Taking Unemployment as an example, how do you get this down to record lows? Well to start with, you close all the job centres you can. People still need to turn up in person to a job centre that is now 20+ miles away in order to claim benefits. Can't afford to travel there? Well that's a sanction (read - Penalty charge) for you and removal of any/all remaining benefits. You're not entitled to any support and you no longer factor into unemployed statistics as you've been kicked off it and are just a lazy parasite, not someone who's in a terminally fucked situation. Catch 22 had nothing on the kinds of statistical manipulation you'll be seeing over the next couple of years.

The end result here is going to be social unrest on a national scale. Food riots are a very strong possibility at the moment. The main question is where and when. I wouldn't rule out seeing a few affluent people killed and cannibalised at this rate. Hell, this should probably happen anyway just to send the appropriate message to the rest of the job creators.

Optimist. Hey, I'd like to see the underdogs bite back as much as the next guy but there are way to many false divisions being driven through the group. If there's food riots, it'll be those benefit scrounging unemployed fucks to blame. Expect public sympathy to back the good old boys in black and blue, defending public order against the subhuman scumbags and immigrants. People actually sympathised with the miners and they got away with billyclubbing them to a pulp. Everybody hates the unemployed already. The teevee is pumping out scrounging bastard propaganda 24/7. I expect in a few years time Ant and Dec will be holding phone-in competitions for a member of the public to press the dronestrike button.

When unemployment is up to 30% it'll still be that 30% that's to blame  for all societies woes and joe public will be screaming for deathcamps. That's how unemployment gets down to zero - we kill them. Eventually the population will level off at a couple of hundred rich wankers.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Junkenstein

I'd like to argue with you and prove you wrong.

I'd like to do that, but I really can't.

I'm seriously looking at the emigration process to Canada now. I've got a wife and child to consider now and there's literally no (positive) future here. 
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

P3nT4gR4m

Canada would be an appealing option if not for the fact that the US is right next door. Pretty sure Canada is going to cop more than a bit of fallout when that shit implodes. All my exit strategies involve remote places. Far enough away from population centers to hole up and avoid the flak but close enough to pay the odd scavenging visit.

Best case scenario - the dust settles and some progressive liberal fucks have pwnt the global economy and are handing out UBI to all comers.

Worst case - who fucking cares, it's all over at that point

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Cain

I've heard...rumours...that May wants to pass a far more centralizing agenda for Parliament and the Prime Minister.  Exactly what this entails isn't clear, only that once Brexit is done with, there will still be 3 years on Parliament's shelf life, giving them a huge amount of say over the constitutional arrangements going forward.  Maybe...reducing the powers of Scottish Parliament, to offsee IndyRef 2.0?  Depends how stupid Tories drunk on power with no viable opposition intend to be, but overseas precedents are...unsettling.

Vanadium Gryllz

If the other parties can by some fluke claw back enough seats to remove the Conservative majority (which is... 17 seats? Seems like a bit of a stretch) what would happen? Coalition?

Seems like this was a really bad time to call a GE - everyone is concentrating on campaigning instead of Brexit. If the Tories gain seats that's probably good for them but not for anyone else. If there is some sort of hung parliament then there will be even less consensus on how we should go about leaving the EU.
"I was fine until my skin came off.  I'm never going to South Attelboro again."

Cain

I don't think anyone even wants to form a coalition with the Tories.  The Lib Dems are making this entire campaign about Brexit - if they signed up with the Tories again, the party would collapse from the sheer hypocrisy.  The SNP...would demand IndyRef 2.0, and the Tories wont give it to them.  UKIP is done.  None of the Irish parties want hard Brexit.  The Greens? Hahahahaha.

In that very unlikely event, the Tories would have to rule as a minority government.

Faust

Can we hope for The Grand Coalition of Fuck The Tories?
Sinn Fienn +ulster unionists + SNP + Libdems + labour + greens for government, Jeremy Corben for PM
Sleepless nights at the chateau

Cain


Junkenstein

"(No) power at any cost" is apparently labours campaign slogan.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Cain

"Tories have power, therefore power is bad.  The only way to remain virtuous is to eschew all attempts at power and sniff your own farts for all eternity." - the Labour Party 2017 manifesto, or it may as well be.

Like, I get the sentiment of not wanting to play gotcha politics etc which Corbyn espouses.  I'm very sympathetic to it.  But you're not going to get that kind of political culture overnight, and you're in a far better place to deliver it with an iron-clad Labour majority in the Commons than you are with your own party mounting abortive coup attempts against you every 6 months and you're stuck fending off the Lib Dems (of all fucking people). 

Cain

I see the anti Lib Dem strategy is "Tim Farron hates Teh Ghey (maybe)".  Even though he doesn't, and even if he did, he's already said his personal opinion doesn't reflect the party's longstanding commitment to LGBT rights.

Junkenstein

Quote from: Cain on April 25, 2017, 07:45:53 PM
I see the anti Lib Dem strategy is "Tim Farron hates Teh Ghey (maybe)".  Even though he doesn't, and even if he did, he's already said his personal opinion doesn't reflect the party's longstanding commitment to LGBT rights.

Someone's bothering to come up with an anti-lib-dem strategy? That's a colossal waste of resources. They are their own anti strategy.

Last story I saw on them was "We're up to 100K members". Which is almost enough to win a seat if they are all in the same location. Which they aren't. So it amounts to "100K people have wasted their own money and can be safely ignored".


In related news, Blair surfaced again to encourage strategic voting against the tories. If that doesn't seal a tory landslide I don't know what will.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.