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General Trump hilarity free-for-all thread

Started by Mesozoic Mister Nigel, November 22, 2016, 04:26:22 PM

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Fujikoma

#2565
I will vote for any Jesus that isn't Adam Sandler.

EDIT: Sorry, I just do not like Adam Sandler's sense of humor. I like Jerry Seinfeld's sense of humor because he's one of the rare comics who never seem to punch down.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on April 03, 2019, 06:08:18 PM
Quote from: Fujikoma on April 03, 2019, 09:14:21 AM
FYI, Jesus wasn't white.

Of course not, he was Jewish. He would've looked like Jerry Seinfeld or Woody Allen or Mel Brooks

EDIT:
or Adam Sandler

2000 years ago, would have looked Arabic, you twat.
Molon Lube

Fujikoma

#2567
In the book of revelations, Jesus has hair that's described like wool. This isn't lovey-dovey Jesus either, this is angry, end of the world, why'd you leave the freaking stove on Jesus.

EDIT: Sorry, my payee called yesterday and I managed to talk her into sending MORE money, despite being drunk out of my gourd and ranting about stupid nazis. This topic came up, when I was explaining everything wrong with white people who argue for racial purity. Seriously, there's still idiots that think racial purity, of white people, is a thing.

EDIT: It's also possible that Roger is actually Jesus. No, we don't want to go there, because that would be indisputable proof that god hates us and wants us to catch fire.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Fujikoma on April 03, 2019, 06:58:35 PM

EDIT: It's also possible that Roger is actually Jesus. No, we don't want to go there, because that would be indisputable proof that god hates us and wants us to catch fire.

If Roger was Jesus, he wouldn't still be dead, would he?  No.  He would have erupted from the ground and punched you dead in the nuts.

But he isn't Jesus, and he's decomposing nicely.
Molon Lube

altered

Roger is only Jesus in that we flog his corpse around as justification for our heathen actions
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: nullified on April 03, 2019, 09:47:53 PM
Roger is only Jesus in that we flog his corpse around as justification for our heathen actions

Yep.  Payne is our actual Pop Up Jesus.
Molon Lube

altered

That explains why he's been missing for what seems like two millennia
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

Annnnnnnd Barr is going to have John Mitchell's old cell.  :lulz:
Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

AND congress just subpoenaed the IRS for Trump's tax returns.

Trump:  "I'm still being audited."

Nadler:  "Bitch I didn't ask you."
Molon Lube

altered

All the political dudes are beginning to blend together, remind me who these fucksticks are?
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: nullified on April 04, 2019, 01:26:23 AM
All the political dudes are beginning to blend together, remind me who these fucksticks are?

Nadler (D-Pandemonium) is the judiciary committee chief.  If he is after you, cancel Christmas.
Molon Lube

altered

Sorry, I had meant Barr and Mitchell. I just googled them up myself like some sort of cretin but cannot find any clear details on why you say Barr's headed in the steps of Mitchell. Got a link?
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: nullified on April 04, 2019, 01:44:21 AM
Sorry, I had meant Barr and Mitchell. I just googled them up myself like some sort of cretin but cannot find any clear details on why you say Barr's headed in the steps of Mitchell. Got a link?

Because it looks like the report that Mueller handed him didn't bear much resemblance to what Barr told congress the report said.
Molon Lube

Fujikoma

Wait, are people actually going to get what they deserve for once?

hooplala

"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)"
— Walt Whitman