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Open Bar: Free Russian Orphans with Every Purchase

Started by Cain, July 12, 2017, 09:47:44 AM

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hooplala

Quote from: Emo Howard on July 20, 2017, 04:56:28 PM
I'm filling out a job application, and one of the questions is "Tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

Am I wrong in interpreting this as "Make up some outlandish shit about yourself"?  I mean, how could something factually accurate be "creative"?

I'm thinking of saying something like "I was born in a dirigible, and can communicate telepathically with creamed corn."

Go with "garmonbozia" instead.
"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)"
— Walt Whitman

Brother Mythos

My wife rescued a baby bird a couple of days ago. He had, apparently, fallen out of a nest his parents insisted upon building in the high end of one of our 2nd story rain gutters.

I didn't think she would be able to save the little guy, as we've never had any success with this sort of thing in the past. But, our little guest is doing just fine! He's fledgling size and has quite an appetite, as well as quite a voice. My wife is feeding him, moistened dry cat food, tiny pieces of fruit, hard-boiled egg yoke, and moistened bird suet on roughly an hourly basis. 

We think our little guest is a house wren, and we're hoping we can release him to the backyard in a few more days.
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

Trivial

Quote from: Brother Mythos on July 20, 2017, 09:20:48 PM
My wife rescued a baby bird a couple of days ago. He had, apparently, fallen out of a nest his parents insisted upon building in the high end of one of our 2nd story rain gutters.

I didn't think she would be able to save the little guy, as we've never had any success with this sort of thing in the past. But, our little guest is doing just fine! He's fledgling size and has quite an appetite, as well as quite a voice. My wife is feeding him, moistened dry cat food, tiny pieces of fruit, hard-boiled egg yoke, and moistened bird suet on roughly an hourly basis. 

We think our little guest is a house wren, and we're hoping we can release him to the backyard in a few more days.

Cool!
Sexy Octopus of the Next Noosphere Horde

There are more nipples in the world than people.

Trivial

Not sure the mechanism, but if there's a bad storm at night, I can't have any carbs that are normally on the next day.  Stress maybe?  It's weird.

Like one piece of toast was too much today.
Sexy Octopus of the Next Noosphere Horde

There are more nipples in the world than people.

The Good Reverend Roger

That does it.  Ima go listen to Linkin...Uh, wait.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cain

POFP, physical security at most sites is a complete fucking joke.  You wouldn't believe the number of schools you can freely stroll into with a lanyard, fake ID, clipboard and cheap suit.  And I know for a fact that my co-workers do not actually check the credentials of site contractors before letting them in.  Hell, they let random weirdos in motorcycle helmets (AKA the organised criminal uniform) off the streets on a daily basis.  Sure most of them are delivery guys, but given the kind of students we have, one day they wont be.

Junkenstein

And if you think that's bad, you'd be terrified about some of the places I've wandered into with just a high-viz vest and "How're ye doing?"
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

POFP

Yeah, the stories and concepts I was reading about are in The Art of Human Hacking by Christopher Hadnagy. He goes into so much detail, but it seems like a lot of this stuff is overkill in literally almost every situation. It seems like, after some thought, and reading some of your guys' descriptions, all you have to know how to do is not say anything blatantly suspicious and not be an asshole and you can get in anywhere you want. It seems like this book applies only to cases where you're trying to break into an actually secured facility. Based on the detail and meticulous methodology, the facility would likely have to be owned by an intelligence agency for this book not to be a waste.



Hell, speaking of school security, I'm on the University of Cincinnati campus all the time, and as long as you're not black (Think Dubose-Tensing case) and there are no sports events going on, you can pretty much go wherever, say whatever, and do whatever you want. When the school isn't in use, literally every building and every room is essentially open to the public. There are no restrictions, and no one is ever checking anyone's access. There are more UC police officers patrolling the surrounding black neighborhoods than there are on the campus itself. I don't know what makes your students so important that they require a dedicated security system, but they've made it clear that they don't give a shit about the safety of students here :lulz:

And the DORM "Security Measures?" Shit's student-run. Some snobby math major sits at a desk by the front door 2 days out of the week and maybe asks to see your Driver's license (What the fuck does that even do exactly? "YOU CAN GO AHEAD. YOUR FACE MATCHES THIS PICTURE YOU HANDED ME.") when she's not scrolling Facebook on her laptop or complaining of boredom to her friend on the phone. (Hypothetical individual, it's not the same person every time.)

This country's security is run by failures at every level in every industry. Makes me even more excited to enter the security industry. Any advice on where to start? What college courses you recommend or suggest I avoid?
This Certified Pope™ reserves the Right to, on occasion, "be a complete dumbass", and otherwise ponder "idiotic" and/or "useless" ideas and other such "tomfoolery." [Aforementioned] are only responsible for the results of these actions and tendencies when they have had their addictive substance of choice for that day.

Being a Product of their Environment's Collective Order and Disorder, [Aforementioned] also reserves the Right to have their ideas, technologies, and otherwise all Intellectual Property stolen, re-purposed, and re-attributed at Will ONLY by other Certified Popes. Corporations, LLC's, and otherwise Capitalist-based organizations are NOT capable of being Certified Popes.

Battering Rams not included.

Cain

It doesn't get any better with professional government bodies.  I spent about 40 minutes wandering around a military base once, while I was waiting to get interviewed (company was not located on the base).

Honestly, security is a state of mind and I don't think there are any good courses specifically on it.  I took courses on international security, game theory, international strategy and (of course) a shit-ton of terrorism.  But even before that, I taught self-defence classes.  And I've read a shit ton of spy memoirs, intelligence manuals and military strategy guides that have no doubt also helped to shape my outlook.  I've no doubt the mindset can be taught...I've just not seen anyone do it very successfully.

LMNO

Is it not written in the Chao te Ching, "a nice tie opens many doors"?

Yes, it is. Chapter 27.

POFP

Quote from: Cain on July 21, 2017, 04:30:03 PM
It doesn't get any better with professional government bodies.  I spent about 40 minutes wandering around a military base once, while I was waiting to get interviewed (company was not located on the base).

Honestly, security is a state of mind and I don't think there are any good courses specifically on it.  I took courses on international security, game theory, international strategy and (of course) a shit-ton of terrorism.  But even before that, I taught self-defence classes.  And I've read a shit ton of spy memoirs, intelligence manuals and military strategy guides that have no doubt also helped to shape my outlook.  I've no doubt the mindset can be taught...I've just not seen anyone do it very successfully.

Ah, thank you for the advice! Would you be able to provide access to any digital forms of these resources?

Feel free to PM me links if that's a preferred medium. Or if you know where I can buy/rent any similar resources, that would also be helpful.

Also, no worries if any/all are limited access. I understand some of the stuff you work with has to be kept under wraps. I just figured I'd ask. Anything I can get a hold of is helpful.
This Certified Pope™ reserves the Right to, on occasion, "be a complete dumbass", and otherwise ponder "idiotic" and/or "useless" ideas and other such "tomfoolery." [Aforementioned] are only responsible for the results of these actions and tendencies when they have had their addictive substance of choice for that day.

Being a Product of their Environment's Collective Order and Disorder, [Aforementioned] also reserves the Right to have their ideas, technologies, and otherwise all Intellectual Property stolen, re-purposed, and re-attributed at Will ONLY by other Certified Popes. Corporations, LLC's, and otherwise Capitalist-based organizations are NOT capable of being Certified Popes.

Battering Rams not included.

Cain

When I'm back in the UK, I can certainly put together some resources for you.

POFP

Quote from: Cain on July 21, 2017, 08:51:09 PM
When I'm back in the UK, I can certainly put together some resources for you.

That would be much appreciated. Thank you! :)
This Certified Pope™ reserves the Right to, on occasion, "be a complete dumbass", and otherwise ponder "idiotic" and/or "useless" ideas and other such "tomfoolery." [Aforementioned] are only responsible for the results of these actions and tendencies when they have had their addictive substance of choice for that day.

Being a Product of their Environment's Collective Order and Disorder, [Aforementioned] also reserves the Right to have their ideas, technologies, and otherwise all Intellectual Property stolen, re-purposed, and re-attributed at Will ONLY by other Certified Popes. Corporations, LLC's, and otherwise Capitalist-based organizations are NOT capable of being Certified Popes.

Battering Rams not included.

Eater of Clowns

Quote from: LMNO on July 21, 2017, 05:20:30 PM
Is it not written in the Chao te Ching, "a nice tie opens many doors"?

Yes, it is. Chapter 27.

:lulz: :argh!:
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

LMNO

Verily, the words of the non-prophets are scribbled on the bathroom walls of the sub-universe.


Or something like that.