For my part, I’ve replaced optimism and believing the best of people by default with a grin and the absolute 100% certainty that if they cannot find a pig to fuck, they will buy some bacon and play oinking noises on YouTube.
What? and also maybe
Ooh, thanks! I didn't know I could do that.Whoever it was never got in, I was just kidding about that part.
You can actually cure death itself with proper hydration. Look at corpses - all dried up husks. Not a coincidence.
You might be surprised by just how many ailments can be alleviated by just maintaining proper hydration. Everything from headaches and migraines to depression and obesity.
Maybe that whole "water memory" thing was really doctors posing as naturopaths to get people to drink some damn water.