Open Bar: Free Russian Orphans with Every Purchase

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm on a regimen of pillz for life now. It's not worth trying to deal with my head by myself and also I have hypertension without some correction.

On a personal note I'm soon moving in about mid October if all works out. I won't have 24/7 Internet access anymore so I may be spotty about comms for a while until I find decent employment. New place is subsidized housing and WAY nicer than my current rat hole squat. It's 30% of my income or $50 whichever is more. Caps at $650 all utilities included.

I'm really hoping to get work at the local brewery. Pay starts at $14 and goes up to $18/hr pretty quickly based on number of hours worked. If I get that job and can handle it I'm not waiting on the disability appeal. I'm starting to recover from the depression and the appeal is a long shot. Downside of the brewery is it smells like a beer-fart and there's potentially broken glass to deal with. The new place is downtown so finding other work is easy if I don't get in at the brewery. Much up in the air right now, but things are looking up!

Good luck.  A job at a brewery is something you can eventually retire from.

Thanks! I figure 30 years should set me up pretty good if I just stick to it. I've also decided to entirely quit smoking grass for at least 20 years. I'll reassess when I'm 55, but it's not been doing my life any good I realized. It's bad for my emotional stability as well as my occupational well being and gives little real benefit in return. I'm not even sad about it. It's almost like I'm angry and NEED to change things. I don't know if that's healthy but it's a damn sight better than despair and depression.

There isn't much that is worse than depression.

I spent 15 years trying to be something I'm not, and that led only to despair.  Intoxicants by definition make you something you're not.

[The Wizard Joseph]

I'm on a regimen of pillz for life now. It's not worth trying to deal with my head by myself and also I have hypertension without some correction.

On a personal note I'm soon moving in about mid October if all works out. I won't have 24/7 Internet access anymore so I may be spotty about comms for a while until I find decent employment. New place is subsidized housing and WAY nicer than my current rat hole squat. It's 30% of my income or $50 whichever is more. Caps at $650 all utilities included.

I'm really hoping to get work at the local brewery. Pay starts at $14 and goes up to $18/hr pretty quickly based on number of hours worked. If I get that job and can handle it I'm not waiting on the disability appeal. I'm starting to recover from the depression and the appeal is a long shot. Downside of the brewery is it smells like a beer-fart and there's potentially broken glass to deal with. The new place is downtown so finding other work is easy if I don't get in at the brewery. Much up in the air right now, but things are looking up!

Good luck.  A job at a brewery is something you can eventually retire from.

Thanks! I figure 30 years should set me up pretty good if I just stick to it. I've also decided to entirely quit smoking grass for at least 20 years. I'll reassess when I'm 55, but it's not been doing my life any good I realized. It's bad for my emotional stability as well as my occupational well being and gives little real benefit in return. I'm not even sad about it. It's almost like I'm angry and NEED to change things. I don't know if that's healthy but it's a damn sight better than despair and depression.

There isn't much that is worse than depression.

I spent 15 years trying to be something I'm not, and that led only to despair.  Intoxicants by definition make you something you're not.

It's steadily dawning on me that what the culture teaches us to be is a broken reflection of what a healthy primate SHOULD be. And so no wonder that we get so sick. I'm glad you figured it out before it.. did to you what it very nearly did to me.

Now if I'm going to live I gotta LIVE DAMN IT. I'M NOT DEAD YET!!

[Brother Mythos]

I'm on a regimen of pillz for life now. It's not worth trying to deal with my head by myself and also I have hypertension without some correction.

On a personal note I'm soon moving in about mid October if all works out. I won't have 24/7 Internet access anymore so I may be spotty about comms for a while until I find decent employment. New place is subsidized housing and WAY nicer than my current rat hole squat. It's 30% of my income or $50 whichever is more. Caps at $650 all utilities included.

I'm really hoping to get work at the local brewery. Pay starts at $14 and goes up to $18/hr pretty quickly based on number of hours worked. If I get that job and can handle it I'm not waiting on the disability appeal. I'm starting to recover from the depression and the appeal is a long shot. Downside of the brewery is it smells like a beer-fart and there's potentially broken glass to deal with. The new place is downtown so finding other work is easy if I don't get in at the brewery. Much up in the air right now, but things are looking up!

Good luck, Joseph.

For what it's worth, I was diagnosed with clinical depression (dysthymia) a long, long time ago. Fortunately, it does get easier to deal with over time. Don't let yourself give in to it. I'm now at the point in my life where I don't give it much thought. When I recognize that I am a bit depressed, I simply acknowledge it, and mentally move on.

[Chelagoras The Boulder]

i've been dealing with depression since i was diagnosed at 19, its a bitch and a half, but it can be tackled with the right amount of effort and support. I wish you all the luck, Joseph.

[The Wizard Joseph]

I'm on a regimen of pillz for life now. It's not worth trying to deal with my head by myself and also I have hypertension without some correction.

On a personal note I'm soon moving in about mid October if all works out. I won't have 24/7 Internet access anymore so I may be spotty about comms for a while until I find decent employment. New place is subsidized housing and WAY nicer than my current rat hole squat. It's 30% of my income or $50 whichever is more. Caps at $650 all utilities included.

I'm really hoping to get work at the local brewery. Pay starts at $14 and goes up to $18/hr pretty quickly based on number of hours worked. If I get that job and can handle it I'm not waiting on the disability appeal. I'm starting to recover from the depression and the appeal is a long shot. Downside of the brewery is it smells like a beer-fart and there's potentially broken glass to deal with. The new place is downtown so finding other work is easy if I don't get in at the brewery. Much up in the air right now, but things are looking up!

Good luck, Joseph.

For what it's worth, I was diagnosed with clinical depression (dysthymia) a long, long time ago. Fortunately, it does get easier to deal with over time. Don't let yourself give in to it. I'm now at the point in my life where I don't give it much thought. When I recognize that I am a bit depressed, I simply acknowledge it, and mentally move on.

i've been dealing with depression since i was diagnosed at 19, its a bitch and a half, but it can be tackled with the right amount of effort and support. I wish you all the luck, Joseph.

Thanks guys! I appreciate the encouragement. I go into deep depression only rarely, but when I do it's bad. My first was in the 4th grade. Therapy has shown me just how much of that is due to violence in my childhood and other factors, but that's not my biggest problem. My biggest and most dangerous problem has been my pride and unwillingness to admit what I am and trying to go without help. I'm on a fairly high dose of antidepressants and a mood stabilizer. I'll be on them for life. I can now accept this in a way I never could before. My stubborn lie that I'm just fine nearly killed me... but didn't. I'll keep on fighting and hope both of you manage the Struggle as well as possible!

[P3nT4gR4m]

For what it's worth, the more I've paid attention, the more there are subtle early warning signs that I'm on a going down. I can avoid sliding all the way down the spiral if I notice and nip the shit in the bud before it's gotten a hold. Mindfulness - turns out it's not just some dumbass hippy bullshit after all.

And, yeah, weed is as likely to make shit worse as it is to help. Unpredictable molecule THC but alcohol is a clean billion times worse. I'd advise laying off the booze uber alles.

[The Wizard Joseph]

For what it's worth, the more I've paid attention, the more there are subtle early warning signs that I'm on a going down. I can avoid sliding all the way down the spiral if I notice and nip the shit in the bud before it's gotten a hold. Mindfulness - turns out it's not just some dumbass hippy bullshit after all.

And, yeah, weed is as likely to make shit worse as it is to help. Unpredictable molecule THC but alcohol is a clean billion times worse. I'd advise laying off the booze uber alles.

Yeah I don't drink much as is. I'm aware of a certain irony should I work at a brewery in that I'll be making poison while abstaining myself because it's unhealthy.
I work on mindfulness daily, but it's the prevention I ignored for an idealized image of my previous employer for years that dragged me down so low. That and the aforementioned pride. Cheers P3nT! Hope that your own struggles are light.

[LMNO]

I finally found one.

I was getting lunch the other day, and an old white guy bellies up to the bar, sees the TV above him talking about Puerto Rico, and says, "Why we spending so much time on this?  I don't want to see hard-earned American taxes go to helping out Those People" (he definitely spoke that with capital letters).

To the bartenders credit, he did attempt to explain to this guy that PR is part of America, and the people there pay federal and Medicare taxes.  This really stymied Racist McRacisthead.  He blustered about "first I've heard" or something, then proceeded to address the server as "hey, stupid." 

I do not want to know what sorts of fresh bodily fluids made it into his lunch.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I finally found one.

I was getting lunch the other day, and an old white guy bellies up to the bar, sees the TV above him talking about Puerto Rico, and says, "Why we spending so much time on this?  I don't want to see hard-earned American taxes go to helping out Those People" (he definitely spoke that with capital letters).

To the bartenders credit, he did attempt to explain to this guy that PR is part of America, and the people there pay federal and Medicare taxes.  This really stymied Racist McRacisthead.  He blustered about "first I've heard" or something, then proceeded to address the server as "hey, stupid." 

I do not want to know what sorts of fresh bodily fluids made it into his lunch.

In Bastard City, the other patrons would have explained his error in terms he could understand.

It's really the only good thing about this place.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

For what it's worth, the more I've paid attention, the more there are subtle early warning signs that I'm on a going down. I can avoid sliding all the way down the spiral if I notice and nip the shit in the bud before it's gotten a hold. Mindfulness - turns out it's not just some dumbass hippy bullshit after all.

And, yeah, weed is as likely to make shit worse as it is to help. Unpredictable molecule THC but alcohol is a clean billion times worse. I'd advise laying off the booze uber alles.

Yeah I don't drink much as is. I'm aware of a certain irony should I work at a brewery in that I'll be making poison while abstaining myself because it's unhealthy.
I work on mindfulness daily, but it's the prevention I ignored for an idealized image of my previous employer for years that dragged me down so low. That and the aforementioned pride. Cheers P3nT! Hope that your own struggles are light.

If your head isn't right, the right amount of any intoxicant is "zero".

And working in a Colt factory doesn't mean you have to own firearms.  Just saying.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

For what it's worth, the more I've paid attention, the more there are subtle early warning signs that I'm on a going down. I can avoid sliding all the way down the spiral if I notice and nip the shit in the bud before it's gotten a hold.

So, what, you jump in a kayak and tell the Atlantic WHAT until you feel better?

[P3nT4gR4m]

Getting the shit kicked out me by the Atlantic does seem to be a natural antidepressant. Ymmv

[Cain]

I finally found one.

I was getting lunch the other day, and an old white guy bellies up to the bar, sees the TV above him talking about Puerto Rico, and says, "Why we spending so much time on this?  I don't want to see hard-earned American taxes go to helping out Those People" (he definitely spoke that with capital letters).

To the bartenders credit, he did attempt to explain to this guy that PR is part of America, and the people there pay federal and Medicare taxes.  This really stymied Racist McRacisthead.  He blustered about "first I've heard" or something, then proceeded to address the server as "hey, stupid." 

I do not want to know what sorts of fresh bodily fluids made it into his lunch.

I love how "first I've heard" is so obviously a fault on their part, yet whenever people use it they inevitably sound petulant and whiney, as if reality itself shouldn't be able to inconvenience them by not conforming to their notions.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Cholera in Puerto Rico.

Pour a little out for your homies.

[Cain]

I'm hearing the damage is so bad that PR's infrastructure, including electrical grid, has been knocked back 40 to 60 years.  It's going to take a decade to recover under optimal conditions.