Poll

The aliens haven't contacted us because:

We're made of meat
They have, they just talked to Roger first.
Have you met us?
We're the most advanced thing in the galaxy.
Space is like, really big.
Time is like, really long.
SHUT UP
There aren't any.

Author Topic: The aliens haven't contacted us because  (Read 3212 times)

The Johnny

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<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

Doktor Howl

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #61 on: March 03, 2019, 03:07:18 am »
Even on the rare occasion when humans TRY to make things better, they just fuck it up and everything becomes scum.


https://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/delta-has-apologised-after-handing-out-creepy-diet-coke-napkins-to-passengers-encouraging-them-to-give-their-number-to-their-plane-crush/ar-BBTfnk8?ocid=spartanntp

Wanna be my plane-crash-crush?  :kiss:

Well, YOU'RE a sight for sore eyes.  Where the hell have you been?
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

Cain

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #62 on: March 03, 2019, 09:51:28 am »
Maybe the aliens are even dumber than us? Spaceships aside, I'm not so impressed.

"Yup, this is definitely a human anus. Just like the other two million we've probed. Remember when we used to mutiliate cattle? I mean, don't get me wrong, we had the DNA sequences from the start so it was equally pointless, but at least it was a change. Something different."

The Johnny

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #63 on: March 03, 2019, 10:40:20 am »
Even on the rare occasion when humans TRY to make things better, they just fuck it up and everything becomes scum.


https://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/delta-has-apologised-after-handing-out-creepy-diet-coke-napkins-to-passengers-encouraging-them-to-give-their-number-to-their-plane-crush/ar-BBTfnk8?ocid=spartanntp

Wanna be my plane-crash-crush?  :kiss:

Well, YOU'RE a sight for sore eyes.  Where the hell have you been?

What matters is that i'm here to contact the hoomanz  :asshat:

But ok for real, i think it was 2014? So I finished my bachelors on Social Psychology, worked some years with literal psychotics, and im about done with my masters on psychoanalysis.

Sort of a FUN ride in all the wrong ways, but i cant complain.  :fnord:
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

The Johnny

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #64 on: March 03, 2019, 10:42:30 am »
Maybe the aliens are even dumber than us? Spaceships aside, I'm not so impressed.

"Yup, this is definitely a human anus. Just like the other two million we've probed. Remember when we used to mutiliate cattle? I mean, don't get me wrong, we had the DNA sequences from the start so it was equally pointless, but at least it was a change. Something different."

"Sure, 2 million is a good sampling, but how about another 2 million? 1,999,999 more to go!"
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

Doktor Howl

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #65 on: March 03, 2019, 04:46:44 pm »
Even on the rare occasion when humans TRY to make things better, they just fuck it up and everything becomes scum.


https://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/delta-has-apologised-after-handing-out-creepy-diet-coke-napkins-to-passengers-encouraging-them-to-give-their-number-to-their-plane-crush/ar-BBTfnk8?ocid=spartanntp

Wanna be my plane-crash-crush?  :kiss:

Well, YOU'RE a sight for sore eyes.  Where the hell have you been?

What matters is that i'm here to contact the hoomanz  :asshat:

But ok for real, i think it was 2014? So I finished my bachelors on Social Psychology, worked some years with literal psychotics, and im about done with my masters on psychoanalysis.

Sort of a FUN ride in all the wrong ways, but i cant complain.  :fnord:

That's fucking awesome.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

chaotic neutral observer

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #66 on: March 03, 2019, 05:09:58 pm »
What matters is that i'm here to contact the hoomanz  :asshat:

Johnny, stop trying to make contact with your food, and finish eating it.  Don't you want any dessert?
You will cooperate with the state, for the good of the state and your own survival. You will confess to the crimes of which you have been accused. You will be released and returned to society a productive citizen if you cooperate. Resistance will be punished. Cooperation will be rewarded.   --"Intersections in Real Time"

nullified

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #67 on: March 03, 2019, 06:04:11 pm »
Even on the rare occasion when humans TRY to make things better, they just fuck it up and everything becomes scum.


https://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/delta-has-apologised-after-handing-out-creepy-diet-coke-napkins-to-passengers-encouraging-them-to-give-their-number-to-their-plane-crush/ar-BBTfnk8?ocid=spartanntp

Wanna be my plane-crash-crush?  :kiss:

Well, YOU'RE a sight for sore eyes.  Where the hell have you been?

What matters is that i'm here to contact the hoomanz  :asshat:

But ok for real, i think it was 2014? So I finished my bachelors on Social Psychology, worked some years with literal psychotics, and im about done with my masters on psychoanalysis.

Sort of a FUN ride in all the wrong ways, but i cant complain.  :fnord:

That's fucking awesome.

Damn, it sure is.

Good to see you back, Johnny.

The Johnny

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #68 on: March 03, 2019, 10:27:30 pm »
What matters is that i'm here to contact the hoomanz  :asshat:

Johnny, stop trying to make contact with your food, and finish eating it.  Don't you want any dessert?

Fiiiiiine mom, but do we still have Soylent Green Jell-O?
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

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Re: The aliens haven't contacted us because
« Reply #69 on: March 16, 2019, 04:52:50 pm »
Finding another inhabited planet, assuming there are any, would be like finding a particular needle in a haystack sized pile of mass-produced needles
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