The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)

[altered]

It occurs to me that I need to offer Dok my condolences.

Whether through misfortune or through insufficient forward thinking, he has doubtlessly improved the lives of dozens of primates at the very least. In the most extreme case, he might have fundamentally changed life for the better for all these stinking apes, however unlikely that may be.

While this has happened in the past, such as when he introduced recreational cannibalism to popular culture, this is not a case of unintended consequences or public misinterpretation. No, Hamish has no one to blame but himself for helping improve the lives of definitely some hairless monkeys. There is no one else to blame.

So I would just like to say: I'm sorry, and it will get worse again soon. It ALWAYS does. Promise.





(Also, NICE. This is awesome. Congrats!)

It will actually help drive lots of things.  Maybe even quality of life.  Maybe.  But it moves me closer to MY goal in the process.

I have hair.
I still want my recreational cannibalism, DAMNIT.

You don't have hair, you have Morgellons.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

It's like coke bugs, then?

[altered]

Except with hair, and no coke. Otherwise, basically yeah. It's a rabbit hole of crazy worth going down, all these people have lost the narrative of reality years ago and now conspiracy theories keep them from coming back.

[Doktor Howl]

So, programming a new controller that we haven't used before.

One of the parameters wasn't right and it displayed:

Error 009; default to main?

As God is my witness, I have no idea what I should do.

[Faust]

The PLC is probably right, Maine is supposed to be lovely this time of year

[Doktor Howl]

The PLC is probably right, Maine is supposed to be lovely this time of year

Maine is never lovely.

I am more concerned that Hirley0 may have been even more correct than I thought.

[chaotic neutral observer]

So, programming a new controller that we haven't used before.

One of the parameters wasn't right and it displayed:

Error 009; default to main?

As God is my witness, I have no idea what I should do.

Hunt down whoever is responsible for that useless error message and punch them continuously until they fix it.
Keep punching them for a while after they've fixed it, too, as a matter of general principle.

[Doktor Howl]

So, programming a new controller that we haven't used before.

One of the parameters wasn't right and it displayed:

Error 009; default to main?

As God is my witness, I have no idea what I should do.

Hunt down whoever is responsible for that useless error message and punch them continuously until they fix it.
Keep punching them for a while after they've fixed it, too, as a matter of general principle.

One does not hunt down Hirley0

[The Wizard Joseph]

So, programming a new controller that we haven't used before.

One of the parameters wasn't right and it displayed:

Error 009; default to main?

As God is my witness, I have no idea what I should do.

Hunt down whoever is responsible for that useless error message and punch them continuously until they fix it.
Keep punching them for a while after they've fixed it, too, as a matter of general principle.

One does not hunt down Hirley0

You can only seek without finding Hirley0, or find Hirley0 without seeking. Which may mean Hirley0 is the essence of the Tao or some shit, IDK.

But on that note...

[tyrannosaurus vex]

So, programming a new controller that we haven't used before.

One of the parameters wasn't right and it displayed:

Error 009; default to main?

As God is my witness, I have no idea what I should do.

Hunt down whoever is responsible for that useless error message and punch them continuously until they fix it.
Keep punching them for a while after they've fixed it, too, as a matter of general principle.

One does not hunt down Hirley0

You can only seek without finding Hirley0, or find Hirley0 without seeking. Which may mean Hirley0 is the essence of the Tao or some shit, IDK.

But on that note...

The mystery was always staring us in the face. His name wasn't Hirley1 for a reason.

[The Wizard Joseph]

So, programming a new controller that we haven't used before.

One of the parameters wasn't right and it displayed:

Error 009; default to main?

As God is my witness, I have no idea what I should do.

Hunt down whoever is responsible for that useless error message and punch them continuously until they fix it.
Keep punching them for a while after they've fixed it, too, as a matter of general principle.

One does not hunt down Hirley0

You can only seek without finding Hirley0, or find Hirley0 without seeking. Which may mean Hirley0 is the essence of the Tao or some shit, IDK.

But on that note...

The mystery was always staring us in the face. His name wasn't Hirley1 for a reason.

I just attempted to enter "hirley" into Google translate. It is not found among the languages of humanity, even as a proper noun. The translation language detector desperately insisted that it must be an English word after I tremblingly tapped enter, perhaps because it knows I speak English by my location, and yet it has absolutely no definition anywhere at all. It's a complete lack of definition merged with a "0". So I asked Google what sort of number 0 was.

0 is a rational, whole, integer and real number. Some definitions include it as a natural number and some don't (starting at 1 instead).Jun 28, 2015 

Being whole, yet of no substance
Being rational, yet without self definition
Being an integer, yet nonexistent
Being real, and yet an expression of non-realness

Let us not argue about naturalness, it would be unseemly. Hirley0 is only defined by Hirley0.

[Pergamos]

0 as a rational number kind of makes my brain hurt, since you can't divide by zero and ratios are division.  I mean, you can, but the resulting number is not rational, real, or even complex or imaginary.

[The Wizard Joseph]

0 as a rational number kind of makes my brain hurt, since you can't divide by zero and ratios are division.  I mean, you can, but the resulting number is not rational, real, or even complex or imaginary.

I have it on good authority that all you have to do is breathe properly and it all becomes much more tolerable, if not actually ok.

[Doktor Howl]

0 as a rational number kind of makes my brain hurt, since you can't divide by zero and ratios are division.

Yes you can.

[LMNO]

0 as a rational number kind of makes my brain hurt, since you can't divide by zero and ratios are division.

Yes you can.

You're just gonna go giving the secrets away, aren't you?