Maps

[Doktor Howl]

So, I've been trying to plot out everyone's maps here at work.  I plan to flesh these out a bit.  I am trying to be as honest as I can about all of this, or it's useless to me.

Boss's boss:  This place is a couple of golf courses with a resort-esque town stapled on the end of it.  His worthless employees cannot keep the resort part going without whining about cash.

Boss:  This place is a military unit that is severely dysfunctional and would everyone please stop the cutthroat shit because it's getting kinda scary.  (He just retired from the air force and has very odd ideas about how the civilian workplace operates.  I've been there.)  Can't we just get things done?

Evil HR Lady:  A BIG HAPPY FAMILY (with her as the first among equals, of course.)  THE PENALTY FOR NOT HUGGING IS DEATH.  HR would be less messy if there were no people.

Me:  This place is busted and we have work to do.  Things that get in the way of the work are bad.  If you simply must be sick, die at home so you don't infect the rest of the crew.  Yes, the situation is really that bad.  No, there is no line item for your feelings.  GET OUT THE WAY.

More later.

[Doktor Howl]

Chef:  Same map as me, but really angry about it.  And the results are tastier and do surprisingly small amounts of damage to your cardiovascular system.  People don't clean things enough, or even clean enough things.  Make my Alto Sham work, Dok, or I will fucking kill you.  Why is all of my kitchen equipment as old as George Burns?

(note:  2 pieces of equipment are actually older than Chef, because he is a zygote.)

[minuspace]

This is currently my favorite thread.

[Suu]

Chef:  Same map as me, but really angry about it.  And the results are tastier and do surprisingly small amounts of damage to your cardiovascular system.  People don't clean things enough, or even clean enough things.  Make my Alto Sham work, Dok, or I will fucking kill you.  Why is all of my kitchen equipment as old as George Burns?

(note:  2 pieces of equipment are actually older than Chef, because he is a zygote.)

This man sounds like a goddamn hero.

[Doktor Howl]

Chef:  Same map as me, but really angry about it.  And the results are tastier and do surprisingly small amounts of damage to your cardiovascular system.  People don't clean things enough, or even clean enough things.  Make my Alto Sham work, Dok, or I will fucking kill you.  Why is all of my kitchen equipment as old as George Burns?

(note:  2 pieces of equipment are actually older than Chef, because he is a zygote.)

This man sounds like a goddamn hero.

He is the 29 year old clone of ECH.  He even LOOKS like ECH.