Author Topic: Offensive words  (Read 1361 times)

chaotic neutral observer

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Offensive words
« on: November 24, 2018, 02:12:18 pm »
Don't use these words, or I'll hit you.

1.  Recalibrate
You meant to say "modify" or "reconfigure".  When the Vulculons invent a new deflector shield technology that is immune to your phasers, the solution does not involve recalibration.

Recalibration is for adjusting things to make them accurate.  For example, when your phasers are shooting two miles to the left, it's time for a recalibration.  Another case requiring recalibration would be when Kirk's tricorder measures Yeoman Rand's vital statistics incorrectly, he gets her the wrong size lingerie, and she hits him.

2. Critical mass
Critical mass is when having too much of a certain type of stuff in one place makes things go boom.  "Approaching critical mass" is not a generic term for your space engine / reactor / widget getting dangerously close to the boom point, except maybe if too much phlebotinium got into it (and in that case, it's the phlebotinium approaching critical mass, not your space engine).  If in doubt, just say "approaching critical", and I won't have to hit you.

3. DNA
I can't believe I have to say this about stuff written in 201x.
You don't understand DNA.  DNA is not who you are.  It does not contain your memories, skills, or personality, anymore than the blueprints to your house tell you the contents of the refrigerator.  If someone gets a sample of your DNA, they can't make another you, no matter how much science they have.  The best they can do is make someone with some physical resemblance, who maybe shares a couple of mental disorders.  Sort of like an "identical" twin.
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Doktor Howl

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Re: Offensive words
« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2018, 04:44:46 pm »
Don't use these words, or I'll hit you.

1.  Recalibrate
You meant to say "modify" or "reconfigure".  When the Vulculons invent a new deflector shield technology that is immune to your phasers, the solution does not involve recalibration.

Recalibration is for adjusting things to make them accurate.  For example, when your phasers are shooting two miles to the left, it's time for a recalibration.  Another case requiring recalibration would be when Kirk's tricorder measures Yeoman Rand's vital statistics incorrectly, he gets her the wrong size lingerie, and she hits him.

2. Critical mass
Critical mass is when having too much of a certain type of stuff in one place makes things go boom.  "Approaching critical mass" is not a generic term for your space engine / reactor / widget getting dangerously close to the boom point, except maybe if too much phlebotinium got into it (and in that case, it's the phlebotinium approaching critical mass, not your space engine).  If in doubt, just say "approaching critical", and I won't have to hit you.

3. DNA
I can't believe I have to say this about stuff written in 201x.
You don't understand DNA.  DNA is not who you are.  It does not contain your memories, skills, or personality, anymore than the blueprints to your house tell you the contents of the refrigerator.  If someone gets a sample of your DNA, they can't make another you, no matter how much science they have.  The best they can do is make someone with some physical resemblance, who maybe shares a couple of mental disorders.  Sort of like an "identical" twin.
Screw this one up, and I'm gonna punch you in the gut. Hard.

Another version of recalibrate is when you say "the data does not match my preconceived notions, so obviously we have to allow for some error in instrumentation so that the instruments report reality the way I prefer it."


Thai food also can reach critical mass.  In my ass.
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, shattered underpance lies,
With blown elastic, and exploded back,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, Spag of Spags:
Look on my ass, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

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Re: Offensive words
« Reply #2 on: August 14, 2019, 04:48:35 am »
phlebotinium

Well if we're doing this than I have to point out that that idiom misuses the prefix phlebo-

It should only be used in contexts similar to its original use in vampire action-science-fantasy media
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rong

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Re: Offensive words
« Reply #3 on: August 15, 2019, 01:22:42 am »
Another version of recalibrate is when you say "the data does not match my preconceived notions, so obviously we have to allow for some error in instrumentation so that the instruments report reality the way I prefer it."

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Oversight
you meant to say, "forgot" or "fucked up"
"he was a smart feller who felt smart"