Author Topic: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime  (Read 590 times)

Brother Mythos

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Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« on: July 14, 2019, 12:42:36 am »
As per the article:

“A Catholic bishop in Colombia hopes holy water will curb violence in a city struggling with crime and corruption.

Rubén Darío Jaramillo Montoya traveled on a fire truck to some of Buenaventura's most crime-ridden neighborhoods on Saturday, sprinkling water that he had blessed in an attempt to thwart drug trafficking gangs and other illegal groups.”

Here's the link: https://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory/colombian-bishop-hopes-holy-water-curb-citys-crime-64316213?cid=clicksource_4380645_null_headlines_hed

Now, the fire engine in the article's photograph is a clearly “pumper.” But, the article states the bishop was “sprinkling water that he had blessed.” So, I have to ask: Wouldn't blessing the water in the pumper's tank, and then spraying it around the city have been more effective? Or, is this a quality versus quantity thing?

I also have to ask: Why don't we see holy water being sprayed out of fire engines in any of the modern era vampire movies? To me, it seems like a no-brainer for vampire crowd control.   

And lastly: Do we Discordian's have a good holy water equivalent?

The Johnny

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #1 on: July 14, 2019, 12:49:46 am »

Sometimes I sprinkle people with the cooled off water which i used to boil my hot dogs in.
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #2 on: July 14, 2019, 12:52:24 am »
1: My understanding is that a blessing for holy water is lengthy and labor intensive and requires a special receptacle the act is performed over. My understanding of holy water blessing is weak, however, because it’s something with a lot of conflicting information.

2: Because vampire media is made exclusively by cowards and the most horribly boring of “creative” types.

3: Golden apple juice, pour on someone else or their belongings to spice up any occasion instantly.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #3 on: July 14, 2019, 02:39:16 am »
1: My understanding is that a blessing for holy water is lengthy and labor intensive and requires a special receptacle the act is performed over. My understanding of holy water blessing is weak, however, because it’s something with a lot of conflicting information.
The skills of a properly trained homeopath would be helpful, I think, in diluting holy water without loss of efficacy.  I can think of no reason why they cannot mass produce the stuff.

Quote
2: Because vampire media is made exclusively by cowards and the most horribly boring of “creative” types.
Almost exclusively.  I'd say Joss Whedon was an exception, but I haven't watched Buffy in decades, so I reserve the right to waffle on the matter if enough of you disagree with me.

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3: Golden apple juice, pour on someone else or their belongings to spice up any occasion instantly.
Or a nice hard cider.

And then the pieces fell into place.
The recent health craze regarding Apple Cider Vinegar was clearly a secret Discordian conspiracy, to get us all to bless ourselves with Eristic Holy Water.  :fnord:
But who was the ringleader?  How was this all going to end?  And what kind of apples were they using?
"When I say 'engineering', I have unreasonable expectations.  It must - as you know - look good in PADS AND give you plenty of help ducking and weaving in meetings.  But it must also, at some distant point in time, function.  If it does not, then you must accept that you are not in fact an engineer but instead an MBA.  Hang your head in SHAME, sinner!"

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #4 on: July 14, 2019, 03:00:04 am »
Apple cider vinegar isn’t Discordian Holy Water, it’s Discordian Holy Piss. There isn’t really much difference, though, except one makes you smell bad for a week.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

Cain

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #5 on: July 14, 2019, 01:20:04 pm »
That's how it works.

For his next trick, he will bless the rains down in Africa to stop violence.

Brother Mythos

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #6 on: September 15, 2019, 08:14:21 am »
Holy Water – It's Not Just for Baptisms and Fighting Crime and Corruption Anymore!

Yes, Priests Air-Bombed a Russian City With Holy Water to Stop All the “Drinking” and “Fornication”

As per the article:

“Priests in the Russian city of Tver took to the skies this week to save local citizens from drunken craziness by air-bombing the town with holy water.

Clergymen poured out 70 liters’ worth of sacred liquid from a large chalice through the open door of a rickety green plane on Wednesday, in an escalation of their battle against “drinking” and “fornication,” local outlet Tvernews reported.

Local television showed a priest strapped into a harness to keep him from accidentally falling from the airplane while tipping gallon after gallon onto the city below.”

Here's the link: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3azzx/stop-leaving-cigarettes-and-beer-on-funeral-altars-irish-priest-begs?utm_source=reddit.com

Cramulus

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #7 on: September 15, 2019, 02:27:16 pm »
I flush Discordian holy water every single day

Fujikoma

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #8 on: September 15, 2019, 02:33:31 pm »
I flush Discordian holy water every single day

Explains why the whole world is going mad, waste water treatment facilities probably don't have filters to take that shit out.

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Re: Colombian bishop hopes holy water will curb city's crime
« Reply #9 on: September 15, 2019, 03:57:57 pm »
Holy Water – It's Not Just for Baptisms and Fighting Crime and Corruption Anymore!

Yes, Priests Air-Bombed a Russian City With Holy Water to Stop All the “Drinking” and “Fornication”

As per the article:

“Priests in the Russian city of Tver took to the skies this week to save local citizens from drunken craziness by air-bombing the town with holy water.

Clergymen poured out 70 liters’ worth of sacred liquid from a large chalice through the open door of a rickety green plane on Wednesday, in an escalation of their battle against “drinking” and “fornication,” local outlet Tvernews reported.

Local television showed a priest strapped into a harness to keep him from accidentally falling from the airplane while tipping gallon after gallon onto the city below.”

Here's the link: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3azzx/stop-leaving-cigarettes-and-beer-on-funeral-altars-irish-priest-begs?utm_source=reddit.com

I believe that you posted the wrong link.  The subject of your link was: "Stop Leaving Cigarettes and Beer on Funeral Altars, Irish Priest Begs"

I think this is what you meant to post:

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/ywa33j/yes-priests-air-bombed-a-russian-city-with-holy-water-to-stop-all-the-drinking-and-fornication

To avoid this type of mistake, I suggest using the forum's preview feature, and testing each link in your post before proceeding.  Using your browser's "Open in new window" function will reduce the risk of you losing your post in the process.
"When I say 'engineering', I have unreasonable expectations.  It must - as you know - look good in PADS AND give you plenty of help ducking and weaving in meetings.  But it must also, at some distant point in time, function.  If it does not, then you must accept that you are not in fact an engineer but instead an MBA.  Hang your head in SHAME, sinner!"