The Blackest Friday: 2019 holiday season / pre-election gun buying deals!!!

[Bruno]

Also, if Cletus is stupid enough to go anywhere near starving city folk, he's gonna get eaten.

Hell, he's going to get eaten ANYWAY, because HERE COMES EVERYBODY!

While I am filled with a potpourri of stark terror, existential dread, and helpless anxiety at this thought, I am also simultaneously filled with the supreme awe, and endless wonder of living in a world dominated by weaponized pedal taverns.

[Doktor Howl]

.

[Bruno]

So far, I'm seeing an unusually high number of deals on scopes, which could only mean they plan on going heavy with the snipers. I've been practicing my serpentine running technique, but holy shit is that rough on the knees! Not a friend to the ankles, either! SHEESH!


Instructional video enclosed to assist with training:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2_w-QCWpS0


Hope this helps, and good luck out there!

[Cramulus]

It occurs to me that most serious gun collectors I know want a civil breakdown.  Probably to "simplify" things.  Which is in fact what would happen.

For example, if the logistics streams (food and gasoline) are interrupted by just 18 hours, things get REALLY simple.  By which I mean, "civilization is gone, there is no getting it going again, 295,000,000 people die within 3 years, and the remaining 30,000,000 live like rats.  And that's the last hot shower anyone gets for a thousand years.  We will of course drag Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean Islands, and Guatemala down with us, because 295 million people aren't going to sit still and starve.

Some people think that would be an improvement - or even a world worth surviving in - because our culture is just that sick.  They are wrong, of course.  Things can get worse than this.  Things can ALWAYS get worse than this.  Sweating the electric bill is one thing, death from starvation is another thing entirely.

I was just reflecting on how a lot of gun fetishists I know have this kink where they verbally fantasize about what would happen if somebody broke into their house.

They all tell the same little narrative about how they don't LIKE violence, but if somebody came in to steal stuff or hurt people, that person would be getting a hot lead bukkake, followed by a hot lead enema, followed by a hot lead golden shower. And I can't help but notice that as they described this, their breath got quicker, their eyes dialated, their voice went up an octave... it's the exact cadence of someone having phone sex.

And I think it's a similar thing to what you're describing--that the 2A crowd can't wait for the moment when the fetish is finally justified.

[Doktor Howl]

It occurs to me that most serious gun collectors I know want a civil breakdown.  Probably to "simplify" things.  Which is in fact what would happen.

For example, if the logistics streams (food and gasoline) are interrupted by just 18 hours, things get REALLY simple.  By which I mean, "civilization is gone, there is no getting it going again, 295,000,000 people die within 3 years, and the remaining 30,000,000 live like rats.  And that's the last hot shower anyone gets for a thousand years.  We will of course drag Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean Islands, and Guatemala down with us, because 295 million people aren't going to sit still and starve.

Some people think that would be an improvement - or even a world worth surviving in - because our culture is just that sick.  They are wrong, of course.  Things can get worse than this.  Things can ALWAYS get worse than this.  Sweating the electric bill is one thing, death from starvation is another thing entirely.

I was just reflecting on how a lot of gun fetishists I know have this kink where they verbally fantasize about what would happen if somebody broke into their house.

They all tell the same little narrative about how they don't LIKE violence, but if somebody came in to steal stuff or hurt people, that person would be getting a hot lead bukkake, followed by a hot lead enema, followed by a hot lead golden shower. And I can't help but notice that as they described this, their breath got quicker, their eyes dialated, their voice went up an octave... it's the exact cadence of someone having phone sex.

And I think it's a similar thing to what you're describing--that the 2A crowd can't wait for the moment when the fetish is finally justified.

And just like all kinks, it is boring as hell to people who don't share that kink.

Having spent many years in the infantry, back when you guys were just naughty thoughts in your parents' minds, that type of person automatically assumes that I am one of them, and starts jabbering.  You have to be firm.  You have to say "NO" and maybe smack them with a rolled-up towel, or they will literally talk you into a coma about it.

Ever see the cringe-fest that is Facebook when someone brings up how into BDSM they are?  You try to turn away from your screen, but it is too late.  20 other soccer moms show up and then they all try to out kink each other, and you cringe until you prolapse.

There is literally no functional difference between 50 Shades of Grey and Guns & Ammo magazine.

[Fujikoma]

If someone broke into my house I'd probably offer them a cup of hot cocoa and scrambled eggs, lecture them on the importance of property rights, ask them what they need the money for anyway, and offer them some cash to just clean shit up. "It's a lot easier than owing me for a broken window, which, by the way, you're not getting paid until you work that off." Oh, baby, yeah. Getting all hot and sweaty just thinking about it. "So, what degree did you get with those crippling student loans?"

[Bruno]

If someone broke into my house I'd probably offer them a cup of hot cocoa and scrambled eggs, lecture them on the importance of property rights, ask them what they need the money for anyway, and offer them some cash to just clean shit up. "It's a lot easier than owing me for a broken window, which, by the way, you're not getting paid until you work that off." Oh, baby, yeah. Getting all hot and sweaty just thinking about it. "So, what degree did you get with those crippling student loans?"

If somebody broke into my house, I'd probably assume they were one of my roommates friends I've never met before, ignore them, and make myself a sandwich or something.

[Cain]

If someone broke into my house while I was there, I'd assume it wasn't to steal stuff because thieves aren't looking for confrontation.