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a petition

Started by tyrannosaurus vex, April 06, 2020, 04:21:49 PM

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tyrannosaurus vex

the world is awful and nothing makes any sense anymore including questions of life and death, so i am requesting ideas for discordian chaos magic rituals that could resurrect TGRR because we need his guidance in this trying time.
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.


Recover the body parts from the various quarries we buried him in and sit him in front of fox and friends until he reanimates
Sleepless nights at the chateau

Doktor Howl

I welded the bastard's coffin shut, so the most you will get is thumping noises and muffled whinging.

Molon Lube

The Wizard Joseph

I took the precaution of putting his head in a black granite ossuary sealed in lead by the power of Saturn and dropped it in the ocean somewhere deeper than science yet dares to tread, but I'm not sure that will hold The Last Prophet down for long.
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
- Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

"You program the controller to do the thing, only it doesn't do the thing.  It does something else entirely, or nothing at all.  It's like voting."
- Billy, Aug 21st, 2019

"It's not even chaos anymore. It's BANAL."
- Doktor Hamish Howl


Gotta be honest guys, I keep finding back hair and the stink of spite in the weirdest places. I don't know if you got all of him.
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.


Request denied for not following the proper formatting.

You should have said:


Something about having to prep ourselfs from necromantically raised TGRRs which will use our own rants against us




Cain is correct. Consequently, your pention has been denied.

a better place to leave it is under the porn in the legislator's office

Eater of Clowns

TGRRs poomp is inmate to the structure of his existence. We staked his tongue with an iron nail. We bound his thumbs in Canadian rebar from Remington's sculpture. But we could not stop the generation of poomp.

At this point it's accumulated beyond the capacity of his coffin and collapsed in on itself. It has engulfed his remains and the resulting mixture is a hate poomp measurable only in megatons. Opening the container would be a near cataclysmic event, with the shit tornadoes potentially triggering the North American supervolcano.

What I'm saying is, we need Junkensteins crowbar.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.