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Started by Junkenstein, July 09, 2020, 06:38:37 PM

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Faust

We need one semi working holideck, it only needs to be stable for five minutes, it is not for recreation of the crew, but we will tell our investors it is
Sleepless nights at the chateau

Cain

Security procedures in general need to be overhauled. My proposal is a giant sign, which says "No", which the Chief Security Officer can hit people with when they suggest stupid ideas.

"That's a derelict ship of unknown origin, lets send over a small team with no biohazard protections so we can investigate."

*hit with the sign*

"This unknown but quite hostile alien species wants to open a communication channel but there seems to be a lot of data involved. Well, let's hope they're not hacking the ships defenses hey!"

*hit with the sign*

"Lets contact the Q continuum and..."

*yeeted out the airlock without hesitation*

The Wizard Joseph

I was thinking more like a holo-closet or booth that only fits one average sized humanoid and gets wiped down once a month whether it needs it or not. 2/3 of the latinum gets kicked upstairs for protec.. Er I mean research.

Quote from: Cramulus on July 13, 2020, 06:34:39 PM
How many times do I have to say I'm sorry about Holodecks 1-8 and 10-14???

in my defense, everybody clicked YES to the terms of service; they CONSENTED to what happened to them.




Deserved what they got, IMO.

WHAT PART OF "SAFETY PROTOCOLS DISENGAGED" WAS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND!?
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
- Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

"You program the controller to do the thing, only it doesn't do the thing.  It does something else entirely, or nothing at all.  It's like voting."
- Billy, Aug 21st, 2019

"It's not even chaos anymore. It's BANAL."
- Doktor Hamish Howl

Cain

Also all dating/romance holosuite programs are to be replaced with ultafast extranet and fleshlights or dildos. No exceptions.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Cain on July 13, 2020, 06:38:36 PM
Security procedures in general need to be overhauled. My proposal is a giant sign, which says "No", which the Chief Security Officer can hit people with when they suggest stupid ideas.

"That's a derelict ship of unknown origin, lets send over a small team with no biohazard protections so we can investigate."

*hit with the sign*

"This unknown but quite hostile alien species wants to open a communication channel but there seems to be a lot of data involved. Well, let's hope they're not hacking the ships defenses hey!"

*hit with the sign*

"Lets contact the Q continuum and..."

*yeeted out the airlock without hesitation*

"Have we tried negotiating with the ship that's covered in coffins?"
Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Faust on July 13, 2020, 06:38:00 PM
We need one semi working holideck, it only needs to be stable for five minutes, it is not for recreation of the crew, but we will tell our investors it is

I am all about "emergency" holo programs.

"Hello, I'm TGRR.  What is your rage emergency?"
Molon Lube

Cramulus

Everybody laughed when I said I was gonna train the romance AI on Chuck Tingle novels

Nobody was laughing when they got pounded in the ass by a sentient version of the Terms of Service agreement

LOVE IS REAL

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Cramulus on July 13, 2020, 06:43:42 PM
Everybody laughed when I said I was gonna train the romance AI on Chuck Tingle novels

Nobody was laughing when they got pounded in the ass by a sentient version of the Terms of Service agreement

LOVE IS REAL

Okay, I changed my mind.  The holo deck is in, but at the sole discretion of the morale officer.
Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

It just occurred to me that Peter Pan was basically a vampire story told from a child victim's point of view.
Molon Lube

Cramulus

true -- & that's basically the plot of Lost Boys


Doktor Howl

Quote from: Cramulus on July 13, 2020, 06:51:46 PM
true -- & that's basically the plot of Lost Boys



LOL, never made that connection.
Molon Lube

chaotic neutral observer

Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 13, 2020, 06:48:17 PM
It just occurred to me that Peter Pan was basically a vampire story told from a child victim's point of view.
Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning.

Pay particular attention to this point.  It's very important that you stop and seek shelter when the sun rises, or you will burst into flames and die.
Desine fata deum flecti sperare precando.

Faust

Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 13, 2020, 06:52:15 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on July 13, 2020, 06:51:46 PM
true -- & that's basically the plot of Lost Boys



Ive never thought about it beyond "the lost boys live forever",  but pan and the count share an awful lot:
Detachable shadows wrecking menace, hovering outside young girls bed windows needing to be invited in.
LOL, never made that connection.
Sleepless nights at the chateau

Cramulus

btw if you've seen Lost Boys but haven't seen the Sexy Sax Man Awakens Michael's Sexuality edit, you owe it to yourself to watch the full 3 minutes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpuwcINDHnQ

Cramulus