Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only

[Faust]

We need one semi working holideck, it only needs to be stable for five minutes, it is not for recreation of the crew, but we will tell our investors it is

[Cain]

Security procedures in general need to be overhauled. My proposal is a giant sign, which says "No", which the Chief Security Officer can hit people with when they suggest stupid ideas.

"That's a derelict ship of unknown origin, lets send over a small team with no biohazard protections so we can investigate."

*hit with the sign*

"This unknown but quite hostile alien species wants to open a communication channel but there seems to be a lot of data involved. Well, let's hope they're not hacking the ships defenses hey!"

*hit with the sign*

"Lets contact the Q continuum and..."

*yeeted out the airlock without hesitation*

[The Wizard Joseph]

I was thinking more like a holo-closet or booth that only fits one average sized humanoid and gets wiped down once a month whether it needs it or not. 2/3 of the latinum gets kicked upstairs for protec.. Er I mean research.

How many times do I have to say I'm sorry about Holodecks 1-8 and 10-14???

in my defense, everybody clicked YES to the terms of service; they CONSENTED to what happened to them.




Deserved what they got, IMO.

WHAT PART OF "SAFETY PROTOCOLS DISENGAGED" WAS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND!?

[Cain]

Also all dating/romance holosuite programs are to be replaced with ultafast extranet and fleshlights or dildos. No exceptions.

[Doktor Howl]

Security procedures in general need to be overhauled. My proposal is a giant sign, which says "No", which the Chief Security Officer can hit people with when they suggest stupid ideas.

"That's a derelict ship of unknown origin, lets send over a small team with no biohazard protections so we can investigate."

*hit with the sign*

"This unknown but quite hostile alien species wants to open a communication channel but there seems to be a lot of data involved. Well, let's hope they're not hacking the ships defenses hey!"

*hit with the sign*

"Lets contact the Q continuum and..."

*yeeted out the airlock without hesitation*

"Have we tried negotiating with the ship that's covered in coffins?"

[Doktor Howl]

We need one semi working holideck, it only needs to be stable for five minutes, it is not for recreation of the crew, but we will tell our investors it is

I am all about "emergency" holo programs.

"Hello, I'm TGRR.  What is your rage emergency?"

[Cramulus]

Everybody laughed when I said I was gonna train the romance AI on Chuck Tingle novels

Nobody was laughing when they got pounded in the ass by a sentient version of the Terms of Service agreement

LOVE IS REAL

[Doktor Howl]

Everybody laughed when I said I was gonna train the romance AI on Chuck Tingle novels

Nobody was laughing when they got pounded in the ass by a sentient version of the Terms of Service agreement

LOVE IS REAL

Okay, I changed my mind.  The holo deck is in, but at the sole discretion of the morale officer.

[Doktor Howl]

It just occurred to me that Peter Pan was basically a vampire story told from a child victim's point of view.

[Cramulus]

true -- & that's basically the plot of Lost Boys

[Doktor Howl]

true -- & that's basically the plot of Lost Boys

LOL, never made that connection.

[chaotic neutral observer]

It just occurred to me that Peter Pan was basically a vampire story told from a child victim's point of view.

Second star to the right, and straight on 'til morning.

Pay particular attention to this point.  It's very important that you stop and seek shelter when the sun rises, or you will burst into flames and die.

[Faust]

true -- & that's basically the plot of Lost Boys

Ive never thought about it beyond "the lost boys live forever",  but pan and the count share an awful lot:
Detachable shadows wrecking menace, hovering outside young girls bed windows needing to be invited in.
LOL, never made that connection.

[Cramulus]

btw if you've seen Lost Boys but haven't seen the Sexy Sax Man Awakens Michael's Sexuality edit, you owe it to yourself to watch the full 3 minutes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpuwcINDHnQ

[Cramulus]

on the note of peter pan