Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only

[EK WAFFLR]

Hey spags. What's going on?

[Doktor Howl]

Hey spags. What's going on?

Well, aside from a plague, an insurrection, 4 years of Trump, and creeping Cramulus economic theory, not too much.  You?

[Cramulus]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

[The Wizard Joseph]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

AWWWWWW SHIT!! There's gonna be Cramspawn up in the house!

[Faust]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

Congrats man!

[minuspace]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

[Doktor Howl]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

HUZZAH!

Allow me to bestow upon you the wisdom that grandpa Howl gave my dad, and my dad gave me:

"You never get to stop worrying again.  You're gonna worry about your girl while she's pregnant, then worry about the kid when the kid is growing up and then YOUR KID will have kids and you'll start all over again."

Welcome to the club, Cram!

[Suu]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

HOT DAMN!

Congratulations, Professor!

[Cramulus]

Thanks, Pals.

I'm real excited. And now every time I wake up in the middle of the night to poop, or because my cat is yodeling, I go "ah, cool, sneak preview"

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Discordian parenting guide?

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

[Roly Poly Oly-Garch]

Hey guys, I'm gonna be a dad.   

INCREDIBLE NEWS! Congratulations my dude!

[Suu]

And the day after my car blew up in the middle of Norfolk, Virginia, I was accepted to a PhD program.

The end.

[Doktor Howl]

And the day after my car blew up in the middle of Norfolk, Virginia, I was accepted to a PhD program.

The end.

God won't let you have nice things until he poops on them.  Trust me on this one.

[Suu]

And the day after my car blew up in the middle of Norfolk, Virginia, I was accepted to a PhD program.

The end.

God won't let you have nice things until he poops on them.  Trust me on this one.

At first I thought the car blew up because Mr. Suu decided he doesn't want to listen to his wife when she goes, "Hey, the Mazda sounds kinda funny, can you take it to work and see if it's acting up or if it's just me?" Then I figured it was because all of the Tampa Bay teams have gotten to their respective finals this year and this is my price.

Head gasket. The magic smoke came out. I freaked out, pulled over, got a tow truck which involved much drama of having a gas station owner yell at me and a cop yelling at the gas station owner for not being helpful to me when I was visibly in distress.

Then I went on base, got Mr. Suu's truck, which also has the check engine light on and needs brakes. I'm scrapping the Mazda this week and using the cash to pay for those fixes.

The PhD is at least fully funded. The hilarious part is getting the new car and getting back down to Florida in the summer.