Best I can do is ANTIFA
I THINK ABOUT ANTIFA 19 HOURS A DAY
I SIT IN MY BASEMENT AND ROCK BACK AND FORTH, AND FOAM GUYS OUT OF MY MOUTH
ANTIFA CAN SECRETLY FLY
ANTIFA SECRETLY RUN EVERYTHING AND OWN EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE
MY DOG IS SECRETLY ANTIFA. I SHAKE HIM FOR ANSWERS BUT HE WAS TAUGHT TO KEEP HIS MOUTH SHUT.
ANTIFA CAN TELEPORT
JERRY SEINFELD IS A SPACE ALIEN WHO CAME FROM THE ANTIFA MOTHERSHIP
ANTIFA OWN AND RUN EVERYTHING BUT THEY ARE NOT SMART, NO SIR, THEY ARE REALLYDUMB
I LIKE TO ACCUSE ANTIFA OF MANY THINGS AND THEN ACCUSE THEM OF WHINING WHEN THEY RESPOND TO MY ATTACKS
YOU ARE SECRETLY ANTIFA
EVERYONE IS ANTIFA
THERE ARE NO ANTIFA
HELP ME, THE VOICES IN MY HEAD FRIGHTEN ME
OHHH MY HEAD HOW IT HURTS
ANTIFA ARE SECRETLY AFRAID OF FRUIT
WHERE IS MY MEDICATION?

*Steals*
Unrelated:
3 hours after a meeting, wherein my team watched one of our customer's Execs shit all over Hewlett-Packard Sales/Account Execs for consistently lying about the OS that their Point of Sale Hardware supported (Causing our customer to waste around $100K+ purchasing said hardware and paying for its integration into our Solution), my Project Manager and I discovered that HP did the EXACT SAME THING to another one of our customers, who were just about to purchase hundreds of similar devices and begin Solution Integration with them.
After checking their documentation, it's actually starting to look like they just decided to put the most common Retail Linux Distribution (Without relevant specificity regarding Minor Version, which absolutely matters in Retail Hardware.) on every new Hardware Datasheet as a supported OS to guarantee purchases from unwise retailers, and then play Dumb/Mister Helpful when someone had to add a new OS/Infrastructure Upgrade Project onto their Hardware Upgrade, and subsequently hire them for further consulting. If the new customer had actually purchased all those units, I'm sure this would have been a huge, potentially class-action lawsuit.
But for now, I just get to tell the first customer "You're not gonna believe this

"