Author Topic: What If?  (Read 1442 times)

Doktor Howl

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What If?
« on: September 27, 2021, 07:01:32 pm »
What if all the things They told you are true?  What if there IS a God, and he's just as described?  We're just his ant farm.  The kind of thing a kid gets and is absolutely FASCINATED by for a few days...and then forgets about it.  The ants get hungrier and meaner, and before long, ant-pocalypse.  The whole while, they're praying to the kid to come back and set things right, but he DOESN'T, so they decided that Those Bastards Over There have been SINNING, and that's why God doesn't come back.  Poof.  Instant pogroms, wars, and the kind of ants than bang on your door when you're hung over, just in case you haven't heard the GOOD NEWS.  The Good News being how you get to go to ant heaven if you are suitably shitty to those Other Bastards.  In God's name.

Meanwhile, the kid is on his X-box, playing WWF.  No living ant has any proof that he actually exists, but boy howdy, will they tell you all about it. 

What if the devil is, as described in the book of Job, a civil servant of God?  Take a minute, look it up.  The first chapter ought to do you just fine.  So God is allowing this guy to screw people up, sometimes on a BET, and God just goes along with it.  Maybe there are space constraints in heaven and God didn't really think we'd be quite this fruitful.  7.9 billion of us, all wanting our heavenly condo...When he had probably planned on maybe 150 million tops.  So he has the devil running around trying to make sure as many people find themselves somewhere else when they die.  What if hell is just a storage locker?

And then there's those OTHER guys that tell us WHAT.  Take for example the Wheeler interpretation.  What if you actually exist in an infinite number of universes, with every decision point made by an intelligent being splitting off another one?  The good news is that in at least a couple of those universes, you did just fine...Financially fine, a great love life, and you're all-around happy.  The BAD news is that those universes aren't real to this one, so you're stuck in the life you got.  And the OTHER bad news is, in most of those universes, you're even more fucked up than you are here.

Example:  In universe 2, Trump got reelected and went hog wild.  In universe 3, he didn't get reelected, but the 1/6 insurrection succeeded, and now you are getting on a train to go hang out with all the other liberals and leftists and paleoconservatives.  Somewhere in Northern Alaska, maybe.  Concertina wire and dogs may be involved, and you will now learn the joys of hard labor on 1100 calories a day.

Or wait.  What if those ivory tower dumbasses are right, and this is all a hologram?  You can't even use the barstool test to dismiss this one, because the barstool would be part of the hologram.  What kind of person would run a hologram like that, and how would that be different than a negligently hostile God?  You couldn't distinguish between them.

Lastly, what if I got some sleep?  Would things be better or not?  Is this universe hopelessly fucked, or is it just my BAD ATTITUDE?

Or Kill Me.

« Last Edit: September 27, 2021, 07:15:53 pm by Doktor Howl »
Molon Lube

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Re: What If?
« Reply #1 on: September 28, 2021, 07:58:50 am »
What if God actually does want us all to get along, and to gain wisdom, and mature into a functioning global society...and keeps inspiring teachers to help us on that path....but we look at these folks each time and say either "FUCK YOU!" OR "You make some nice points but when you die, we're going to murder all the folks that don't believe just like we do"?

Who's the asshole now?

.......

......


.....

It's me. I'm the asshole.

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Doktor Howl

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Re: What If?
« Reply #2 on: September 28, 2021, 04:51:34 pm »
What if God actually does want us all to get along, and to gain wisdom, and mature into a functioning global society...and keeps inspiring teachers to help us on that path....but we look at these folks each time and say either "FUCK YOU!" OR "You make some nice points but when you die, we're going to murder all the folks that don't believe just like we do"?

Who's the asshole now?


The engineer that decided primates would be good as intelligent beings.
Molon Lube

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Re: What If?
« Reply #3 on: September 29, 2021, 09:53:29 pm »
To be fair, I'm not sure any other species would have been a better choice. I mean...maybe cuttlefish...maybe.

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