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The Best Christmas Gifts for the MAGAts on Your List

Started by Brother Mythos, November 12, 2023, 08:03:58 AM

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Brother Mythos

First off, here's a special Christmas gift for some of the toddlers on your list. You can give this very appropriate gift to the little ones who you already know are going to grow up following in their MAGAt parents' footsteps.


Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

For the MAGAts on you list who are into wearing those stylish, not to mention life-affirming, AR-15 pins, there are these lovely Trump Commemorative Cuffs: 





They're also available in "Original (silver tone)," but everyone knows TFG would choose to wear the "Gold-plated" version shown above, if actually given the choice. And, the "Actual Size" shown in the image above "... are sized for our former president's notoriously tiny hands." As an added bonus, "50% of profits from the sales of this pin are donated to local bail funds.

You can buy them here for $ 16.95:   Trump Commemorative Cuffs (Actual Size)
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

For those looking to give the full of it MAGAts on their list a more practical gift, there's this essential item:





It's advertised to be "The Holy Grail of Donald Trump Toilet Paper. There is None Better Out There." And, this claim may even be true, as it's the only TFG toilet paper I've seen that's 3-ply, and comes in its own gift box.

It is pricey, but it can be purchased here:   TFG TP
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

For the older spawn of the MAGAt parents on you list, you may wish to consider giving this classic LEGO set:





This historically accurate representation of the events of January 6th will keep the older children busy. And, it will be a reminder to everyone in their household to stay in contact with, and continue to support their MAGAt friends and family who are still doing hard time in The Big House for their participation in this patriotic adventure for the continuation of democracy.
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

Due to the popularity of the Barbie movie, a number of new Barbie dolls have been commissioned. And, of course, every MAGAt parent would be proud to have one of their favorite MAGAt congresswomen be their daughter's, or daughters', role model. So, this one, from the "Politician Barbie Series," is sure to be a bigly hit among both the girls who receive them, and their MAGAt parents:





Please note: This package does not included any firearms in its already ample accessories package. However, a stylish assortment of firearms is available, and can be purchased separately.
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

#5
Here's another new Barbie doll from the "Politician Barbie Series." Once again, the likeness of a favorite MAGAt congresswoman is honored:





Please Note:   Although this package does, of course, include the weapon appropriate for Pipe Bomber BarbieTM, it does not included any of the firearms a true role-model, MAGAt politician would also be packing for this, or any other occasion. However, a stylish assortment of firearms, as well as additional pipe bombs, are available separately to fully accessorize any and all of the dolls in this soon to be classic new series.
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

Here's another practical gift for the adult MAGAts on your list:





It's the new iSuck Vacuum Cleaner! And, of course, like its developer, it really does suck! And, after receiving it, the grateful MAGAts on you list will swear that such a boast was not mere advertising puffery. After all, if a MAGAt won't trust a claim by TFG, who will they trust?

Here's the link:   iSuck Vacuum Cleaner
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

Here's a special gift MAGAts of any age will appreciate:





Let the MAGAts on your list flaunt their dislike for Democrats with this unique gift. Let them proudly show their support for TFG by displaying this fun "Trumpinator" bobblehead with the tagline "I'll Be Back in 2024".

Here's the link:   Trumpinator Bobblehead
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

Here's a gift that's sure to become a collector's item!





Barbie dolls from the "Politician Barbie Series" have become so popular they've spawned competition from Kock Toy, with their "Fun With Fascism SeriesTM". And yes, the toy company is wholly owned by the same lovable Kocks who astroturfed the Tea Party movement!

And, "Joyful Warrior" is fully accessorized! It come complete with a book to ban, a microphone for preaching, pearls to clutch, fully endorsed reading material, and the essential Book Burning Starter Kit!

Now that Moms for Liberty is up to their eyeballs in a predictable sex scandal, and will soon be in its death throes, this Special Edition doll will only increase in value over time. So, remember to protect your investment by keeping this historical doll in its original package.
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.

Brother Mythos

You really can't make this stuff up. Here's a package deal from "TFG's Tacky Treasonous Trumpery Collection:"





Trump's Desperation to Sell NFTs Has Him Ripping Up His Clothes

As per the article:

"The new "mugshot edition" of the trading cards features a very special deal to entice Trump supporters to fork over even more cash. If one purchases 47 digital cards (in one transaction), they will receive a limited edition physical trading card featuring a scrap of fabric from the suit Trump wore when he had his mugshot taken during his August arrest in Fulton County, Georgia. With each card priced at $99, for a 47-card total of  $4,653, it's an absolute steal.

In promotional materials for the series, Trump referred to his arrest-day suit as "The Most Historically Significant Artifact in United States History." Take a hike, Abe Lincoln's tophat! Get lost, Star-Spangled Banner! Neil Armstrong's spacesuit? Throw it in the trash! That junk can't hold a candle to a suit so priceless, so historically significant, it was torn into 2,024 little pieces so the former president could make some quick cash off trading cards."

In addition:

"Alongside a sliver of fabric, fans who purchase 47 cards will also be invited to dine with Trump at his Mar-a-Lago Palm Beach resort, where you will be gifted another limited edition NFT, as well as a commemorative hoodie.

But wait, there's more.
 
If you're one of the first 200 people to buy 100 digital trading cards with cryptocurrency in a single transaction (that's almost $10,000 worth of Trump NFTs) you will receive an even-more exclusive trading card featuring a piece of Trump's suit AND a sliver of his mugshot tie."

Here's the link:   TFG's Christmas Package Deal
Discordianism is fundamentally mischievous irreverence.

I've upped my game. So, up yours.