From the Desk of TGRR; Corporate Life in the 21st Century (blog)

[LMNO]

I used to do that as well, until I realized it was the equivalent of getting bad grades in school because you're bored.  If I'm not challenged at work, I start considering getting buzzed.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I used to work with people who would get beers during their lunch. I tried it once and then I was all, oh my god this SUCKS! Working with even the smallest amount of alcohol in my system is kind of nightmarish.

I quit a job because all the other electricians would have 6 beer lunches.

That's terrifying.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I used to do that as well, until I realized it was the equivalent of getting bad grades in school because you're bored.  If I'm not challenged at work, I start considering getting buzzed.

Basically, for me, once I have a drink I'm useless for anything. I can't accomplish a single thing after that.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I used to work with people who would get beers during their lunch. I tried it once and then I was all, oh my god this SUCKS! Working with even the smallest amount of alcohol in my system is kind of nightmarish.

I quit a job because all the other electricians would have 6 beer lunches.

That's terrifying.

Yep.  That's why I quit.

[Reginald Ret]

I used to work with people who would get beers during their lunch. I tried it once and then I was all, oh my god this SUCKS! Working with even the smallest amount of alcohol in my system is kind of nightmarish.

I quit a job because all the other electricians would have 6 beer lunches.

That's terrifying.

Yep.  That's why I quit.

Wah?
The only reason i would want beer at lunch is because then i could tell my boss that i am not fit to work at the moment and send myself home for safety reasons. And that is coming from an alcoholic. I don't get people who drink at/before work. Don't they know they have to function for hourse more? Alcohol is fine if you don't have to do anything more complicated than typing without thinking, but i could not possibly keep up the quality of my work on alcohol.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

I used to work with people who would get beers during their lunch. I tried it once and then I was all, oh my god this SUCKS! Working with even the smallest amount of alcohol in my system is kind of nightmarish.

I quit a job because all the other electricians would have 6 beer lunches.

That's terrifying.

Yep.  That's why I quit.

Wah?
The only reason i would want beer at lunch is because then i could tell my boss that i am not fit to work at the moment and send myself home for safety reasons. And that is coming from an alcoholic. I don't get people who drink at/before work. Don't they know they have to function for hourse more? Alcohol is fine if you don't have to do anything more complicated than typing without thinking, but i could not possibly keep up the quality of my work on alcohol.

Two reasons:

1. They're alkies

or 2.:

I used to do that as well, until I realized it was the equivalent of getting bad grades in school because you're bored.  If I'm not challenged at work, I start considering getting buzzed.

Which leads to:

But I'm not going to, because once you take a booze break from this place, well, I may as well just stick a bottle in the drawer where AJ kept his, because once you START, how could you STOP?

And can circle back to 1. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

[Doktor Howl]

THE CONTINUATION OF THE BALL MILL SAGA:

Big meeting, Mike's suspension cancelled because vendors from all over the place are here.

We have now proven, with SCIENCE, that the problem HAS to be the ring gear.  This was after we replaced the $14,000 mill bearings (actually cost way more than $28K, but there's a lot involved).

So we have this big meeting 2 hours ago.  The ring gear IS the problem.  We have imported 2 crazy Germans who have shown WHY the ring gear is the PROBLEM, and the gearbox is a SYMPTOM.

Tracking so far?  Ring gear = root cause, gearbox = "victim" of ring gear.

Everyone in the room has had this bashed into their head with a combination of basic math, physics, and metallurgy.

Meeting is drawing to a close, nobody has shat the bed yet.

WAIT FOR IT...

As we are all standing up to leave, Mike says "I have one more thing I want to talk about..."

Oh, Mike, and you were doing SO well.

Mike:  "We haven't talked about the problem with the gearbox."

My boss turns purple.  I laugh so hard I fall off my chair.  The German guys start screaming abuse at him.  The gear consultant guys from Phoenix sit there staring like a dog came up to them and started singing fucking Clauda Rogers tunes.  The gearbox manufacturing rep looks like he's having a stroke.

Total chaos.  I leave.

10 minutes later, Mike's suspension is reinstated, Jim put Lilly in charge, she refused, they both drive off in different directions, vendors bailing out left and right.

I am the only manager left on the property.


WHAT HAPPENED?
\

This was the best workday I ever had in my whole life.

[Doktor Howl]

My fucking desk is acting up again.  My CD ROM drive on my computer keeps popping out, and I swear I can hear sloshing noises from the file drawer on the left side of my desk, where my predecessors kept their whiskey bottles.  Mike has 3 major capital projects going on, and he's outraged that I won't take care of them for him and leave him all the credit, while making sure to suck up all the blame.

Well, fuck that.  This ain't my first rodeo.  Not touching that shit with a ten foot pole.  Mike can take a swing at project management for once.

Another set of endless meetings to attend, ought to gobble up most of my day.

What would make this day PERFECT would be for Cramulus to peddle through on his unicycle, announcing the start of the American Autocracy with a bullhorn.  And maybe getting prank-called by LMNO when he's been into the absinthe.

Fuck this place.  No, seriously.

It is worth mentioning that this was the exact moment that plant went upside down forever.

[Doktor Howl]

Damn. That place is like Tales from the Crypt meets the Twilight Zone meets Office Space.

It's awesome, really.  I wouldn't work anywhere else.

You say that because there's no where else TO work. Everywhere you'd go would be the same place with a different logo and different names for the morons.

Five and half years later, still true.   

[Doktor Howl]

Bump so I can find this for the new book.

[Faust]

New book? Awesome man, let me know where I can pick it up when it's out

[Doktor Howl]

Will do.  This is a book on management fallacies.  It's going to be a good time.

By the way, do you have any way to reach Junkenstein?