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TESTEMONAIL:  Right and Discordianism allows room for personal interpretation. You have your theories and I have mine. Unlike Christianity, Discordia allows room for ideas and opinions, and mine is well-informed and based on ancient philosophy and theology, so, my neo-Discordian friends, open your minds to my interpretation and I will open my mind to yours. That's fair enough, right? Just claiming to be discordian should mean that your mind is open and willing to learn and share ideas. You guys are fucking bashing me and your laughing at my theologies and my friends know what's up and are laughing at you and honestly this is my last shot at putting a label on my belief structure and your making me lose all hope of ever finding a ideological group I can relate to because you don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about and everything I have said is based on the founding principals of real Discordianism. Expand your mind.

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Give us your best philosophy joke

Started by Malaclypse the Tertiary, September 06, 2005, 10:43:10 AM

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Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#30
October 07, 2013, 11:49:13 PM
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Salty

#31
October 08, 2013, 12:10:08 AM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 07, 2013, 11:49:13 PM
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 07, 2013, 08:40:53 PM
Best philosophy joke?


Ayn Rand.

:spittake:
:lulz:

Thread over.

Also, winner of Least Hateable Noob 2013, congrats, Pere Ubu.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

The Good Reverend Roger

#32
October 08, 2013, 12:16:34 AM
Quote from: Alty on October 08, 2013, 12:10:08 AM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 07, 2013, 11:49:13 PM
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 07, 2013, 08:40:53 PM
Best philosophy joke?


Ayn Rand.

:spittake:
:lulz:

Thread over.

Also, winner of Least Hateable Noob 2013, congrats, Pere Ubu.

I still hate him.  :madbanana:

I'll think of a reason later.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Pere Ubu

#33
October 08, 2013, 01:14:32 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 08, 2013, 12:16:34 AM

I still hate him.  :madbanana:

I'll think of a reason later.

I'm ugly and my mother dresses me funny.

If you meet Eris on the road, YOU WERE PROBABLY HOLDING THE MAP UPSIDE DOWN, DUMBASS.

Grand Episkopos and Lord High Executioner of The Temple Of The Screaming Finger

Dildo Argentino

#34
October 08, 2013, 08:59:06 AM
I heard this in Ireland:

God, Jesus and St. Peter are playing golf in heaven.

St Peter starts. He puts the ball down, hits it, it goes straight in the hole.

Jesus is next. He swings, hits the ball, the ball flies off along a tremendous arch, hits a branch of a tree, bounces back, lands straight in the hole.

God steps up. He hits the ball with a tremendous swing, it flies way outside the course, lands in the mouth of a rabbit. A hawk appears, dives down, picks up the rabbit and flies over the course with it in its talons. Suddenly, an eagle attacks the hawk, the hawk drops the rabbit, as the rabbit is falling through the air it drops the golf ball and it falls right in the hole.

Jesus says: For fuck's sake, dad, it's only a game!
Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis

hooplala

#35
October 08, 2013, 03:55:11 PM
That is neither about philosophy, nor funny.
"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)" — Walt Whitman

Dildo Argentino

#36
October 09, 2013, 08:01:26 AM
Quote from: Hoopla on October 08, 2013, 03:55:11 PM
That is neither about philosophy, nor funny.

Actually, it is. It's about religion, which is sort of folk ontology, epistemology and ethics all in one.

Funny: it's subjective, you know.  :)
Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis

Don Coyote

#37
October 09, 2013, 08:39:33 AM
Quote from: holist on October 09, 2013, 08:01:26 AM
Quote from: Hoopla on October 08, 2013, 03:55:11 PM
That is neither about philosophy, nor funny.

Actually, it is. It's about religion, which is sort of folk ontology, epistemology and ethics all in one.

Funny: it's subjective, you know.  :)


you still suck at jokes.

Dildo Argentino

#38
October 09, 2013, 10:27:14 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on October 09, 2013, 08:39:33 AM
Quote from: holist on October 09, 2013, 08:01:26 AM
Quote from: Hoopla on October 08, 2013, 03:55:11 PM
That is neither about philosophy, nor funny.

Actually, it is. It's about religion, which is sort of folk ontology, epistemology and ethics all in one.

Funny: it's subjective, you know.  :)

you still suck at jokes.

I put it down to very different cultural background. I suck at your jokes.

If you mean the literal reading of the above comment that's an... affectation :)
Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis

LMNO

#39
October 09, 2013, 01:20:13 PM
Ok that one ^^^ wasn't bad.

Mangrove

#40
October 10, 2013, 09:08:25 PM
 :genius:

CARTESIAN DUALISM!!
What makes it so? Making it so is what makes it so.

Faust

#41
October 10, 2013, 09:22:43 PM
Quote from: holist on October 08, 2013, 08:59:06 AM
I heard this in Ireland:

God, Jesus and St. Peter are playing golf in heaven.

St Peter starts. He puts the ball down, hits it, it goes straight in the hole.

Jesus is next. He swings, hits the ball, the ball flies off along a tremendous arch, hits a branch of a tree, bounces back, lands straight in the hole.

God steps up. He hits the ball with a tremendous swing, it flies way outside the course, lands in the mouth of a rabbit. A hawk appears, dives down, picks up the rabbit and flies over the course with it in its talons. Suddenly, an eagle attacks the hawk, the hawk drops the rabbit, as the rabbit is falling through the air it drops the golf ball and it falls right in the hole.

Jesus says: For fuck's sake, dad, it's only a game!

The Aristocrats!
Sleepless nights at the chateau

minuspace

#42
November 25, 2013, 07:41:04 AM
Quote from: holist on October 09, 2013, 10:27:14 AM
Quote from: Don Coyote on October 09, 2013, 08:39:33 AM
Quote from: holist on October 09, 2013, 08:01:26 AM
Quote from: Hoopla on October 08, 2013, 03:55:11 PM
That is neither about philosophy, nor funny.

Actually, it is. It's about religion, which is sort of folk ontology, epistemology and ethics all in one.

Funny: it's subjective, you know.  :)

you still suck at jokes.

I put it down to very different cultural background. I suck at your jokes.

If you mean the literal reading of the above comment that's an... affectation :)
And an exhausting one at that :lulz:

Penumbral

#43
February 06, 2014, 09:31:21 PM
I'm a Nihilist. If you don't know what that means, don't worry. It's meaningless.

Nephew Twiddleton

#44
February 07, 2014, 04:26:30 AM
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS
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