Into The Night With Enrico And So-Called Friends

[hooplala]

*struggles in with large rusty bucket of K-Y, sees AC's, and struggles back out*

[Enrico Salazar]

(peaks out curtain)

FIVE WHORES!  TIFFANY-AMBER THEISEN ISN'T DOING MUCH!

[Shecky D. Albino]

*sighs*

Fuckin prima donna...

[agent compassion]

*builds a large hallway in the middle of the forum*

*hands Shecky a pack of hot dogs*

Sorry, I couldn't find five whores on short notice, but this should approximate the effect fairly well....  

[Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy]

Here you go, I had an extra Tonka helmet anyway and we always spray paint NRA A-OK on ours, so it's all set.

[agent compassion]

::AC rearranges the letters on the helmet to spell ANORAK::

Heh heh heh

[The Good Reverend Roger]

*sighs*

Fuckin prima donna...

You aren't the real Shecky, you imposter.

[Enrico Salazar]

(opens curtains again)

Shecky??  Is this true?

Are you not the Shecky who Enrico's momo took in like one of her own piglets??  Are you not the Shecky Enrico cut the throat of in effort to make blood brother?

Are you not the Shecky Enrico had first three-way with only to find out when lights came on that woman had run for the hills hours earlier?

Are you not the Shecky who poisoned Del Mar's daughter on the night of her wedding just so Enrico could dance with the corpse at her funeral in front of her betrothed, Enrico's brother Stumpy?

Are you not the Shecky who kneeled behind President Carter so Enrico could push him back over you?  And then you puntured his trachea just for kicks?

Are you not the same Shecky who pretended to be a white-supremist on the Geraldo Rivera show and then threw the chair at him breaking his nose?

Are you not the Shecky who snitched to Woodward and Bernstein?

Are you not the Shecky who brought crystals into vogue in the 80's?

Are you not the same Shecky who started Heidi Fleiss on her road to stardom?

Are you not the Shecky who, impersonating Enrico, stabbed Sammy Davis Jr. in the eye and then told him to tell people it was a car accident?

Are you not the same Shecky who convined Roseanne Barr to gain weight for the comedy, and then once fat convinced her she would never make it fat?

Are you not the same Shecky who taunted Bob Dylan into going electric?

WELL?

ARE YOU, OR ARE YOU NOT????

[Shecky D. Albino]

I'm the Shecky who you owe three grand for the extended use of the company whores.

Now pay up you greasy little shit.

[Enrico Salazar]

(turns to the audience)

It's the real Shecky.

(turns to Roger)

Now.  Who is this false Shecky you speak off?

[Cain]

The Shecky who owns http://www.pthppt.com/

[hooplala]

And, of course, there can only be one Shecky on the innernets.

[Cain]

Damn right.  I suggest they fight to the death for the title.

[hooplala]

I'm already assembling the cage.

I'm going to challenge Baron Von Stevenstein as well.  Too damn close if you ask me.

I hope Roger is spending his time wisely, tracking down all the other Rogers on the innernets, instead of worrying about this double Shecky problem.

[Cain]

Surely if they make contact though, they'll asplode because of the paradoxes?