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Messages - Cramulus

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1
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: October 06, 2021, 05:50:01 pm »
Both playtest groups... so basically a 100% rate of Cramulus being used as bait and then dying miserably.

2
Apple Talk / Re: Facebook is down look busy elsewhere
« on: October 05, 2021, 08:28:43 pm »
YO I HEARD FACEBOOK TANKED THIER OWN STOCKS ON PURPOSE IN ORDER TO DISTRACT THE MEDIA FROM THE WHISTLEBLOWERS FILM AT 11 TWEET ME BACK
            /
 :sotw:

3
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: October 05, 2021, 08:27:31 pm »
So I wrote this tabletop adventure for the Mork Borg RPG... it's getting published next month! I have two groups playtesting it, and they sent me really helpful feedback, including a detailed synopsis of their gameplay.

I had TOTALLY FORGOTTEN that I wrote an NPC into the game named Cramulus. There's a small chance of encountering him in these caves, wandering around in the dark (his torch burned out and he's helpless). Completely forgot that was in the adventure. So it surprised the hell out of me when he showed up in these player's reports:

Quote
    Cramulus made it to the trap door and begged for help. The party initially refused but he tossed one of his silver and promised the other four pieces if pulled out. The party obliged and then Pluck-Hermit stated that the debt for his release was set at 150sp, forcing Cramulus into indentures servitude. After feeding him, the tied a rope to Cramulus as used him as a scout back down in the tunnels. Pluck-Hermit used his searching ability to determine his desire was due east and below, so the party headed east....


...They avoided the piles of guano and decided to continue east.

                This would be the partys final encounter before a hard stop. The players rolled 62 and 46: a large copper vein stretched out across the tunnel along with two bodies of the miners from before. A pile of silver coins was stacked 30 feet away. Cramulus was encouraged to take the coins and all of it would be put towards his debt. Cramulus eagerly began cramming coins in his sack, counting them one by one when suddenly, a huge spider pounced on him and sinking its fangs into his neck. He initially resisted the poison IM OKAY BOSS, but then died from the blood loss from the wound, IM NOT OKAY BOSS. A party member cast a confusion on the spider and it skittered away in search of invisible meals, leaving the crawlspace to the east open. Here the session ended.


The other group also encountered Cramulus. He was eaten by a demon worm and is now spinning and screaming in Eel Hell Forever

4
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: October 05, 2021, 08:21:51 pm »
Turns out, late night larp adventures have prepared me for the No Sleep lifestyle.

5
Apple Talk / Re: The "Dead Internet" theory
« on: October 01, 2021, 11:22:11 pm »
How are these Bots substantively different from the patrons of the country and western bar across the street from my home?

the bots have better taste in music

7
Just had news about Verthaine, though.  He's doing well.


wait --- for real???

I've tried to look him up a few times, but since nobody'd heard from him since Katrina, most of us assumed the worst... he's still kickin' though?? that's incredibly good to hear.

He is The Wizard Joseph's landlord.

Small world.


OK, fine. Now I believe in miracles.


Seriously, that's incredible, really warms my heart.

8
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: September 25, 2021, 06:34:02 pm »
Wait, you aren't real and this is a solipsistic hellhole? But that would mean...

Oh goddamn it. I'm the demiurge of the universe AGAIN??? This shit is getting OLD. Let me out of my own head, you pieces of shit!

So this is all your fault? OK that kinda checks out. Hey maybe turn up the heat on Tuscon, for a laugh. And please reimagine me as a cyborg.

9
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: September 24, 2021, 03:53:21 pm »
I can't believe the commander is a real guy and not some kinda wacky online character

10
Apple Talk / Re: parenting advice
« on: September 21, 2021, 06:26:28 pm »
I've been a father for about a month now, and this is what I've learnedzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

11
Apple Talk / Re: Who are all you weirdos?
« on: September 21, 2021, 06:25:46 pm »

It blows my mind that people don't just continue to haunt their old online forums, indefinitely.

we joke about the chronic trolls who have been obssessed with this place for 15 years--get a life, right? and yet, here we are

 :taco:

12
Just had news about Verthaine, though.  He's doing well.


wait --- for real???

I've tried to look him up a few times, but since nobody'd heard from him since Katrina, most of us assumed the worst... he's still kickin' though?? that's incredibly good to hear.

13
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: September 21, 2021, 06:18:17 pm »
what do u like better cake or pie???????????????????????

THE ULTIMATE FORUM THREAD




ps I win

14
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: September 06, 2021, 09:31:48 pm »
tiktok makes me feel like despite being active online since the early 2000's nothing prepared me for what the internet would turn into

:potd:

15
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: September 06, 2021, 05:08:19 pm »
I can't handle tiktok...

like, I could easily watch a full hour of 6-second vines and feel like no time has passed. TikTok does that, but is better at it. Consuming 20 minutes of TikTok feels like eating a whole bag of doritos in one sitting. Tastes good but makes me feel bad.

Oh, and that fad where people lipsync to some audio clip while making OVER THE TOP FACIAL EXPRESSIONS, it's like nails on chalkboard to me.

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