One thing we must all remember is that neither Nigel nor LMNO are the answer. Nor are they in fact the question. No, for LMNO is the awkward pause between the question and the answer, and Nigel is the kick in the junk and/or the slap in the face that goes with the answer.
I like to call it the "Wait, what?" moment.
We must not mock or berate Waffle Iron for being a beardo, for he does not wear the beard. The beard wears him. And to mock his beard in any sense would be disrespectful and unpatriotic (and we are nothing if not patriotic), because that beard fought in Vietnam. It was wounded twice at Khesanh, and recieved the Silver Star for valor for chasing the Viet Cong out of tunnels in South Korea. So an exception to our normal doctrine concerning filthy fucking beardos must be made in this case.
It's name is Shlomo.
Quote from: Waffles, The Iron on June 06, 2012, 08:00:31 PM
It's name is Shlomo.
As far as you know. You have only the beard's word for this.
It is a beard of many talents, so it is possible that the ID it gave me was forged.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 06, 2012, 07:08:55 PM
One thing we must all remember is that neither Nigel nor LMNO are the answer. Nor are they in fact the question. No, for LMNO is the awkward pause between the question and the answer, and Nigel is the kick in the junk and/or the slap in the face that goes with the answer.
:lulz:
When the Irish first came across the Atlantic pond to America, they forgot their leprechauns.
Instead they got Twid. Make of that what you will.
It IS possible to survive as a breatharian, provided that you remain within 100 feet of me and that I have a supply of Indian food. My eruptions are so dense, you can actually filter nutrition out of them.
Hey, nobody said spiritualism was gonna be pleasant, right?
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 07, 2012, 04:39:18 PM
It IS possible to survive as a breatharian, provided that you remain within 100 feet of me and that I have a supply of Indian food. My eruptions are so dense, you can actually filter nutrition out of them.
Hey, nobody said spiritualism was gonna be pleasant, right?
:horrormirth:
3:45 And Nigel instructed the multitudes, saying, "The only animal you may not fuck is the chicken; for it alone among beasts cannot return your love. Likewise, the only facility that is banned unto thee is the port-a-potty, for man was not meant to shit in a smelly closet. So go hence, and shatter them with your hammers and adzes and mattocks, that thou might make a big blue lake for the betterment of all."
This thread really just makes me incredibly happy.
Once Payne stood in front of the Great Gates of Reason, on the Southern end of The City. Payne did remonstrate with the crowd, pointing out their foibles and their errors and telling them to SHUT UP. The unclean, being ignorant of WRATH or even IPA, did begin to mock Payne, and then even to throw stones at him. As the stoning intensified, Payne did look out over the crowd and say, "Ouch! Shit! That hurts!"
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
They have a new thing they've started doing. Something about standing your ground that means chasing people down and shooting them.
Advice for young people:
Just wave a banana, point at your crotch and hoot. If it works at the zoo, it'll work at a rave.
A traffic sign that I personally love is the uneven pavement sign, with the stick figure in the car on an angle. That just KILLS me. It used to be better though, they used to have his whole family in the car with him. I figure they either fell out on a sharp turn or he pushed them out to avoid the high costs of divorce/alimony/child support.
There used to be this building back in Chicago, with a Marine recruiting office above one of those "payday loans" places.
From the side, they have their signs right over each other, so it was:
"The MARINES"
"New! Extended hours!"
Which I think is a nice idea if you are needing to invade a third world country after regular business hours.
10 signs of a possible haunting:
1) Turds left in the toilet mysteriously disappear.
2) The only top-40 stations you can pick up on the radio are owned by Clear Channel. They suck.
3) City water tastes funnier than usual.
4) Cereal boxes are strangely found to be only half-full WHILE STILL SEALED!
5) Leftovers in the fridge spoil after only a few months.
6) Light bulbs burn out days faster than normal.
7) The sink seems to always have dirty dishes in it.
8) The postman stares at you funny. A lot of postmen have ESP and shit and can tell you're haunted.
9) The kitchen floor gets sticky stuff on it that lasts all day, no matter how many times you step in it.
10) Your hemorrhoids start acting up in the morning.
:lulz:
You forgot the one where some dude who collects haunted things comes to your house and points out a very old and valuable family heirloom and says "That's haunted. I can take it off your hands for you. No charge."
That was awesome. He's getting PAID for that. He combined the junk-comber shows with the haunt shows. He gets paid AND he gets to rip off peoples' antiques legally.
You know what they say, though..."The early bird may get the worm, but the SECOND mouse gets the free cheese."
It's just one more metaphor for living in 21st century AmericaTM.
Evil is a dunghill. Everybody climbs up on theirs to speak out against somebody else's.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:42:14 PM
Evil is a dunghill. Everybody climbs up on theirs to speak out against somebody else's.
Yes.
As unpleasant as you may find it, remember that nuclear winter is eminently preferable to the brief yet intense nuclear summer that precedes it.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:39:16 PM
That was awesome. He's getting PAID for that. He combined the junk-comber shows with the haunt shows. He gets paid AND he gets to rip off peoples' antiques legally.
You know what they say, though..."The early bird may get the worm, but the SECOND mouse gets the free cheese."
What? This is on TV? :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on June 15, 2012, 08:15:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:39:16 PM
That was awesome. He's getting PAID for that. He combined the junk-comber shows with the haunt shows. He gets paid AND he gets to rip off peoples' antiques legally.
You know what they say, though..."The early bird may get the worm, but the SECOND mouse gets the free cheese."
What? This is on TV? :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
"The Haunted Collector" or some such shit. It's the best scam since religion was invented.
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
Your Horror Fu is
strong today, TGRR. :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:17:11 PM
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on June 15, 2012, 08:15:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:39:16 PM
That was awesome. He's getting PAID for that. He combined the junk-comber shows with the haunt shows. He gets paid AND he gets to rip off peoples' antiques legally.
You know what they say, though..."The early bird may get the worm, but the SECOND mouse gets the free cheese."
What? This is on TV? :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
"The Haunted Collector" or some such shit. It's the best scam since religion was invented.
It's on SyFy. When it first came on, I thought it was going to be something akin to "Hoarders" instead of "Antique Road Show."
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 16, 2012, 04:57:25 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:17:11 PM
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on June 15, 2012, 08:15:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:39:16 PM
That was awesome. He's getting PAID for that. He combined the junk-comber shows with the haunt shows. He gets paid AND he gets to rip off peoples' antiques legally.
You know what they say, though..."The early bird may get the worm, but the SECOND mouse gets the free cheese."
What? This is on TV? :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
"The Haunted Collector" or some such shit. It's the best scam since religion was invented.
It's on SyFy. When it first came on, I thought it was going to be something akin to "Hoarders" instead of "Antique Road Show."
It seems to work both ways. :horrormirth:
(http://i524.photobucket.com/albums/cc322/fennario99/strat.jpg)
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
:lulz: this is EPIC AWESOME.
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on June 16, 2012, 11:46:22 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
:lulz: this is EPIC AWESOME.
The hard part was stopping. :lulz:
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on June 16, 2012, 04:57:25 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:17:11 PM
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on June 15, 2012, 08:15:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 07:39:16 PM
That was awesome. He's getting PAID for that. He combined the junk-comber shows with the haunt shows. He gets paid AND he gets to rip off peoples' antiques legally.
You know what they say, though..."The early bird may get the worm, but the SECOND mouse gets the free cheese."
What? This is on TV? :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
"The Haunted Collector" or some such shit. It's the best scam since religion was invented.
It's on SyFy. When it first came on, I thought it was going to be something akin to "Hoarders" instead of "Antique Road Show."
I lost any chance at closing the plot arc of
Stargate: Universe for this shit!?!?
:cramstipated:
Those SyFy executives (esp. the woman who canceled Dresden Files, among other things like SG:U) can fuck right off.
"To get the attention of a large animal, be it an elephant or a bureaucracy, it helps to know what part of it feels pain. Be very sure, though, that you want its full attention."
- Kelvin Throop
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 20, 2012, 04:53:33 PM
"To get the attention of a large animal, be it an elephant or a bureaucracy, it helps to know what part of it feels pain. Be very sure, though, that you want its full attention."
- Kelvin Throop
Damn. Timely.
Had some asshole babbling about the "wisdom of the ancients" in my email in-box.
If you really want to know how smart the "ancient ones" were, look at their fucking descendants. Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson are intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and evolutionarily miles ahead of those animals, and they're still po'buckers.
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 05:38:04 PM
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
You can be my King, if you want, Roger.
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:10:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 05:38:04 PM
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
You can be my King, if you want, Roger.
You really don't want that.
Henry VIII,
Old Skool
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 06:11:46 PM
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:10:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 05:38:04 PM
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
You can be my King, if you want, Roger.
You really don't want that.
Henry VIII,
Old Skool
Pagan King, sweetie. Old Skool as in your body will be found one bloody chunk at a time, scattered through a forest.
But don't focus on that. Focus instead on how wonderful your life will be for the next few weeks.
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:17:21 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 06:11:46 PM
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:10:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 05:38:04 PM
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
You can be my King, if you want, Roger.
You really don't want that.
Henry VIII,
Old Skool
Pagan King, sweetie. Old Skool as in your body will be found one bloody chunk at a time, scattered through a forest.
But don't focus on that. Focus instead on how wonderful your life will be for the next few weeks.
Promises, promises. I've been telling these bastards to kill me since 2002, and everyone SAYS they will, but nobody ever actually DOES. It's worse than those religious pricks that run around screaming about the "end times". 43 years of listening to that shit, and I STILL haven't seen any 7-headed beasties
1. I am beginning to become discouraged.
1 I am operating under the assumption that things seen on peyote don't count.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 06:29:10 PM
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:17:21 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 06:11:46 PM
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:10:40 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 05:38:04 PM
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
You can be my King, if you want, Roger.
You really don't want that.
Henry VIII,
Old Skool
Pagan King, sweetie. Old Skool as in your body will be found one bloody chunk at a time, scattered through a forest.
But don't focus on that. Focus instead on how wonderful your life will be for the next few weeks.
Promises, promises. I've been telling these bastards to kill me since 2002, and everyone SAYS they will, but nobody ever actually DOES. It's worse than those religious pricks that run around screaming about the "end times". 43 years of listening to that shit, and I STILL haven't seen any 7-headed beasties1. I am beginning to become discouraged.
1 I am operating under the assumption that things seen on peyote don't count.
You SAY you want it, but you don't. Because otherwise you'd have done it yourself, and framed a Mormon for it.
It counts if the original prediction was made while on peyote.
Quote from: CarvedWood on June 29, 2012, 06:49:34 PM
You SAY you want it, but you don't. Because otherwise you'd have done it yourself,
That would be cheap. Dishonest.
Low.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
Permission to repost with attribution?
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on June 30, 2012, 04:24:44 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
Permission to repost with attribution?
Sure.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 30, 2012, 04:26:11 AM
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on June 30, 2012, 04:24:44 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
Permission to repost with attribution?
Sure.
Thanks. I'll get back to you with the responses.
Where are you posting it?
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 29, 2012, 05:38:04 PM
Had some asshole babbling about the "wisdom of the ancients" in my email in-box.
If you really want to know how smart the "ancient ones" were, look at their fucking descendants. Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson are intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and evolutionarily miles ahead of those animals, and they're still po'buckers.
This is why I will never respect Pagans until they proclaim me their king.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 30, 2012, 06:06:53 AM
Where are you posting it?
On a Facebook app full of whiny self-hating teenagers. Pinks of the worst kind. It's a bit like FizzyGrizzly without all the awesome.
I was thinking of proposing a safari a few months back and your opening paragraph reminded me of the place.
http://apps.facebook.com/itsdarksecrets/post-99730
No bites so far.
A thought about "freaking the mundanes": "Normal" people DON'T LIKE being agitated, disturbed, fucked with and jerked around. It does NOT improve their lives or make them happier. It does NOT make the world a better place to screw things up for the normals just because we're assholes. They are the ones who keep everything running so we can loaf around and think of fucked up concepts and show them to each other. THEY are not the target audience for that sort of thing, THEY are not capable of appreciating it, and if you insist on thrusting fucked up concepts in the faces of "normals" they will suddenly and shockingly change things so you can't do it any more.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on July 05, 2012, 07:55:33 PM
A thought about "freaking the mundanes": "Normal" people DON'T LIKE being agitated, disturbed, fucked with and jerked around. It does NOT improve their lives or make them happier. It does NOT make the world a better place to screw things up for the normals just because we're assholes. They are the ones who keep everything running so we can loaf around and think of fucked up concepts and show them to each other. THEY are not the target audience for that sort of thing, THEY are not capable of appreciating it, and if you insist on thrusting fucked up concepts in the faces of "normals" they will suddenly and shockingly change things so you can't do it any more.
They are also funny as all hell, when you just leave them to get on with it. Now that I think of it, "normal" people are like our slaves, only we don't even need to feed and water the fuckers.
Anger turned inwards is depression.
Anger turned sideways is Nigel.
Anger turned backwards is MY ASS.
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 11, 2012, 02:18:21 PM
Anger turned inwards is depression.
Anger turned sideways is Nigel.
Anger turned backwards is MY ASS.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: How did I miss this?
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on June 30, 2012, 04:24:44 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
Permission to repost with attribution?
Should go in BIP 2013?
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on July 17, 2012, 04:02:56 AM
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on June 30, 2012, 04:24:44 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
Permission to repost with attribution?
Should go in BIP 2013?
Say yes say yes say yes....
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on June 06, 2012, 07:08:55 PM
One thing we must all remember is that neither Nigel nor LMNO are the answer. Nor are they in fact the question. No, for LMNO is the awkward pause between the question and the answer, and Nigel is the kick in the junk and/or the slap in the face that goes with the answer.
And Roger is the horrified silence that follows the question "No... He couldn't have, could he?"
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on July 17, 2012, 04:02:56 AM
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on June 30, 2012, 04:24:44 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
Permission to repost with attribution?
Should go in BIP 2013?
Okay. But I'm re-writing it. I like it, but I fucked up wording it.
Quote from: Remington on July 19, 2012, 03:24:18 AM
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on June 06, 2012, 07:08:55 PM
One thing we must all remember is that neither Nigel nor LMNO are the answer. Nor are they in fact the question. No, for LMNO is the awkward pause between the question and the answer, and Nigel is the kick in the junk and/or the slap in the face that goes with the answer.
And Roger is the horrified silence that follows the question "No... He couldn't have, could he?"
Wrong. Roger is the faint retching noise coming from the trunk of the car, muffled both by the trunk itself, and the leather gimp mask.
"Knowing is half the battle."
The other half usually involves people getting shot and shit catching on fire.
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 24, 2012, 03:51:20 AM
"Knowing is half the battle."
The other half usually involves people getting shot and shit catching on fire.
Oh shit! I thought that was just part of the party.
Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
How do they stand it? All worried about what other people think about them and all pissed because they're all worried about what they think other people think about them and thinking this whole mess is somehow YOUR fault.
But I know...There is no answer because they CAN'T stand it. And that's why they ARE the way they are. They long since got to the point where they stood on their rooftops and shouted "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!" and NOTHING HAPPENED. Then they said it AGAIN but EVEN LOUDER and STILL nothing happened. Even LESS NOTHING happened than last time.
So they took whatever internal regulator there is in people off and the flywheels are spinning and screaming and red hot and emitting a foul-smelling smoke. And they don't have the BALLS to become SERIAL KILLERS so they just get MORE NASTY.
Why do you REALLY think we are supporting a pointless and obviously morally fucked-up war? Do you fools think it really has anything to do with POLITICS? Do you think it has anything to do with THE MEDIA? Do you think it is because of GREED?
If so, WAKE UP PUPPET BOYS! You've become CYNICAL, but not CYNICAL ENOUGH. You've become CYNICAL, but not to the point that you LAUGH UNTIL YOUR GUTS BLEED. You've become CYNICAL, but not cynical enough to believe that a whole nation of overfed, overindulged fatass fabulously wealthy white people can support the organized destruction of a nation of brown people NOT because they believe in it, NOT because they're STUPID, NOT because they've been duped by some well-organized CABAL, but simply and for no other reason than that they are NASTY and ILL-TEMPERED.
We WANT to kill thousands, or tens of thousands of NASTY SMUDGY PEOPLE not because we have ANY reason whatsoever for it but because we are MAD at our husbands, wives, children, brothers and sisters because they changed the TV CHANNEL while we were WATCHING SOMETHING, and we haven't got the BALLS to stand up for ourselves so we TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEBODY ELSE.
There IS no other reason, and that's why you can talk politics until you're blue in the TITS but you will NEVER find a political reason which explains it SANELY.
We go to war because we are NASTY CHICKENSHITS who DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PETTY-ASS FRUSTRATIONS which constitute our LIVES.
No this is not the CLEAN FLAME THROWER WHITE HATE of a MUTANT DISCORDIAN I'm talking about here. Just LOOK at them. LOOK at the nasty bitter pinched evil faces around you, Brothers & Sisters. They aren't even capable of getting PISSED OFF correctly. They DISLIKE their own ODOR.
You know who you are. You know if you are one of them. You know if you have been there chewing on your own teeth hating everybody while HOPING DESPERATELY that they LIKE you. And you know, if a little part inside of you responds to that description, that it is CUNTS LIKE YOU that allow all the -real- evil in the world to go on.
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
HOLY FUCKING FUCK! SHIT FUCK! I want everyone to read this, Roger!
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
Bump.
:horrormirth:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on June 10, 2013, 05:24:03 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
Bump.
:lulz:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:50:22 PM
Fuck you all and the armadillos you rode in on.
THIS is my ultimate keeper. Because Texas.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 14, 2012, 02:17:47 PM
Advice for young people:
Just wave a banana, point at your crotch and hoot. If it works at the zoo, it'll work at a rave.
CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP LAUGHING!
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
YES!
Quote from: /b/earman on June 11, 2013, 09:06:45 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
YES!
I do hope that's been posted at the poetry site. :lulz:
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on June 15, 2012, 08:28:11 PM
An epic haiku, based on a nightmarish image I had of Nigel in her new job, if her new job was in Tucson and done by Arizona rules.
I live in terror
The Law says "Kill the Retards".
Nigel holds the gun
Her shadow engulfs
Her hair is blocking the sun
She thumbs the hammer
I smile stupidly
Nigel simply does not care
I'm too dumb to know
I piss in my pants
Not because I fear Nigel
I'm just retarded
A flash of bright light
She shot me in the kneecap
Just to be a prick
I beg for my life
"Uh muh muh muh uh uh muh"
That's how retards talk
Nigel laughs at me
I'm really bleeding a lot
Why is she so mean?
Nigel aims at my head
But then turns and walks away
Why won't she kill me?
"You'll bleed to death soon"
The girl who shot me chuckles
"Why waste a bullet?"
I deserve this fate
Because I am retarded
The Law is very clear
Things could be much worse
At least I'm not a hipster
That would REALLY suck.
Everything goes black
I wake up in Hell because
God hates retards too.
This is so fucking awesome. :lulz:
:lulz: This was worth revisiting.
I don't think I like the idea that retarded people deserve to die by being shot in the knee and bleeding out. Maybe I am missing something.
Quote from: Pergamos on February 10, 2014, 06:15:01 AM
I don't think I like the idea that retarded people deserve to die by being shot in the knee and bleeding out. Maybe I am missing something.
Yes, you are, which is why I suggest wearing Kevlar kneepads.
Quote from: Pergamos on February 10, 2014, 06:15:01 AM
I don't think I like the idea that retarded people deserve to die by being shot in the knee and bleeding out. Maybe I am missing something.
The idea that you are CLEARLY FUCKING MISSING SOMETHING is an intriguing idea.
Jesus H Christ. Yes, Permagos, you've been here how long? And 11 years of me leaving turds all over the place which clearly frown on harming the helpless certainly indicates that I really believe that retarded people should be shot and left to die, and also that Nigel would be willing to murder retarded people in cold blood, right? Right right right?
UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG
So you're safe. Nobody's gonna shoot you. Retard.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on July 05, 2012, 07:55:33 PM
A thought about "freaking the mundanes": "Normal" people DON'T LIKE being agitated, disturbed, fucked with and jerked around. It does NOT improve their lives or make them happier. It does NOT make the world a better place to screw things up for the normals just because we're assholes. They are the ones who keep everything running so we can loaf around and think of fucked up concepts and show them to each other. THEY are not the target audience for that sort of thing, THEY are not capable of appreciating it, and if you insist on thrusting fucked up concepts in the faces of "normals" they will suddenly and shockingly change things so you can't do it any more.
Did I ask you before about stealing this? I thought I did...
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on February 21, 2016, 09:10:45 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on July 05, 2012, 07:55:33 PM
A thought about "freaking the mundanes": "Normal" people DON'T LIKE being agitated, disturbed, fucked with and jerked around. It does NOT improve their lives or make them happier. It does NOT make the world a better place to screw things up for the normals just because we're assholes. They are the ones who keep everything running so we can loaf around and think of fucked up concepts and show them to each other. THEY are not the target audience for that sort of thing, THEY are not capable of appreciating it, and if you insist on thrusting fucked up concepts in the faces of "normals" they will suddenly and shockingly change things so you can't do it any more.
Did I ask you before about stealing this? I thought I did...
Go ahead.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 21, 2016, 10:17:08 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on February 21, 2016, 09:10:45 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on July 05, 2012, 07:55:33 PM
A thought about "freaking the mundanes": "Normal" people DON'T LIKE being agitated, disturbed, fucked with and jerked around. It does NOT improve their lives or make them happier. It does NOT make the world a better place to screw things up for the normals just because we're assholes. They are the ones who keep everything running so we can loaf around and think of fucked up concepts and show them to each other. THEY are not the target audience for that sort of thing, THEY are not capable of appreciating it, and if you insist on thrusting fucked up concepts in the faces of "normals" they will suddenly and shockingly change things so you can't do it any more.
Did I ask you before about stealing this? I thought I did...
Yay! http://imgur.com/HbR220v
Go ahead.