News:

Endorsement:  I am not convinced you even understand my concepts of moral relativity, so perhaps it would be best for you not to approach them.

Main Menu
Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Messages - Doktor Howl

#16
So.  The board of the company I work for has entered terminal decision paralysis, the company officers are morons who think that eroding our capabilities is a good way to deal with lowered profits (ie, lay off your skilled labor so they run to the competition) instead of leaning into it and accepting some short term losses today to own the market tomorrow.  Our CPO actually said, with a straight face, "we must leverage our synergies" to improve purchasing BY MAKING THE ENTIRE GLOBAL ENTITY RUN *ALL* RAW MATERIAL PURCHASES THROUGH THE HOME OFFICE.  I found myself desperately trying to choke my computer out, because you apparently can't strangle anyone through the internet (note:  save this idea for the next round of proposals).

I work for bad people.  Not bad because we build the eschaton for a living, but because they are stupid, and decide - among other things - that randomly firing a skilled technician for a minor "infraction" that saved the company $15K is a good way to make everyone work harder.  And it has.  We're all working very hard on updating our resumes.

And then things got weird.  5 weird things, all today:

Scott and Fatima are back, only now they have wedding rings.  They got married the same day they were moved out of the ICU, apparently.  That is so Tucson, I don't even know where to start.

Billy tried to hire ME.  This is clearly out of the natural order.  And he's a monster.  I know this because I *built* that monster.  And I don't work for monsters, though I will often work for terminally stupid people.

One of the board members, all of whom are ancient & evil British people, pulled an Elvis and died on the toilet.  He had told his secretary that under no circumstances was he to be disturbed while he was in his office, so nobody was there to help him.  UNLIKE Elvis, through, he was wearing some kind of outfit that caused our stupid leadership to put out a global email saying that nobody should talk about it, because it didn't happen that way, you can't prove it did, so stop saying that.

There is now a 107th use for ballistic gel.

and

On the road home, I passed 3 multiple car pileups (and when I say I passed, I mean I slowly crawled forward in Baltimore traffic that somehow wound up here), 6 people on the side of the road with flat tires, and one cop jabbering into his cell phone wedge his car under the ass-end off a semi.

Everything is falling apart.  The center cannot hold. 

THE FUCKING WORLD IS COMING TO AN END, AND I AM STUCK IN TUCSON.


#17
Principia Discussion / Re: On Pentabarf V.
December 21, 2023, 12:28:11 AM
I came to this thread expecting pinealism, and what did I find?  ACTUAL, ORIGINAL THOUGHT!

This place is going to hell in a space shuttle, I tell ya.

Keep going.
#18
Quote from: Saint K1000 on December 05, 2023, 03:02:14 PM
QuoteAn Error Has Occurred!
The attachments upload directory is not writable. Your attachment or avatar cannot be saved.

Is the upload of avatars prevented to disable the influence of (an)eristic avatars into the forum? Is it a way to reject our Goddess?

:mind ray:
#19
Principia Discussion / Re: Local 73rd Hermits Cabal
December 05, 2023, 12:14:14 AM
Quote from: Tinfoilment on December 03, 2023, 08:17:42 AM
[ curse fraudulence null ] , That name is awesome.  I don't know if the legalist aspect is relevant, beacuse of disregard for the authority of the state over church.

To be honest, I have been off and on forums decades ago, this is my first forum in years.  To encounter prejudice at the first is weird, but whatever.

Prejudice?  You were rude to Altered.  This is what you fucking get.

Try not being a fucking dickbag, and see where it gets you.
#20
Quote from: Chelagoras The Boulder on November 14, 2023, 06:37:54 AM
hey yall, still alive somehow. Spent pretty much this entire year living in a bad Mexican soap opera. I'll probably go into more detail when i have more spoons.

Good to see you.

But it's worth mentioning this board is a misery fest at the moment, so you are once more in a Mexican soap opera.

Altered is having a rough go, my mother just went into hospice care, and Scribbly (previously known as Demosquid) is also not dancing any fandangos. CNO seems to be doing alright.

And aside from one or two pinealists, that's all that's left.  Everyone else drifted away (by which I mean "ran") when wossername's ring wasn't properly kissed.

#21
So Fatima and Scott will be out for a little while, because somehow they thought the vibe table would be a fun place to knock boots.

They are expected to make complete recoveries.
#22
Things I said at work today:

"Well, I don't know why you would need the keys to the wind tunnel, Fatima, but I'm sure you have a good reason.  Here you go."

"No, I don't know why the camera for the wind tunnel went down.  Might be related to the altitude chamber camera problem."

"I'll wait til I get home to take a shit."  *Gets on I10*  *parks*  *nothing moves*  UNNNNNNNNNG
#23
Board member:  "Can you explain the video clip we just watched?"

Hamish:  "Yes.  That's two of my engineers fucking in the altitude chamber.  I would think that was obvious."

Board member:  "I can see that.  What are you going to do about it?"

Hamish:  "Get the janitor have him clean up, and give him a nice bonus."

Board member:  "No, what are you going to do with those engineers?"

Hamish:  "Nothing.  I'm a married man."

Board member:  "Don't play stupid with me."

Hamish:  "I never play."

Other board member: "WHY. ARE. THEY. STILL. WORKING. HERE?"

Hamish:  "Because normal people won't work here.  We make war crimes.  These kids are instrumental in said war crimes, and all they ask is for the use of the chamber once in a while."

Both board members:  "..."

Hamish:  "I also believe that we're looking at unrealized assets, here.  People would line up to pay to fuck in an altitude chamber."

Board member:  *turns red.  Hamish's job security is looking dicey*

Hamish:  "I mean, we only use that thing for like 3 hours a month, and that depreciation isn't getting any cheaper."

Other board member:  "Just get out.  Go back to work.  Or whatever you do when we're not here."

Board member:  "What DO you do here?"

Hamish:  "I find weasels who rat their buddies out to the front office, and then I come up with the hundred and *fifth* use for ballistic gel.  Look, this is really simple.  You allow minor perversions, and these kids will make really, really big perversions for you.  I mean, next to what we produce, what is a little hanky panky at 2500 meters?"

Other board member:  "Which part is giving you trouble?  The get part or the out part?"

Well, back to work.

#24
My mother's cancer, which has been controlled for years now, is galloping off with her.

#25
Hamish:  *does desk haka*

Scott:  "WTF?"

Fatima:  "He just got made a director and it seems to have driven him mad."

Hamish:  "MAD WITH POWER!"

Hamish:  *sticks tongue out, grimaces, roars*

Fatima:  "It's so sad when their aging minds give out."

Hamish:  "Be nice.  I know what you two have been up to in the altitude chamber."

Fatima:  "I will end you and they will never find the body."

Hamish:  "I gotta say, that is the laziest mile high club I've ever heard of."

Fatima:  *starts rage face*

Scott:  "You should run, boss."

Hamish:  *grimaces some more, makes chopping motions with his hands.*
#26
Quote from: Scribbly on October 04, 2023, 03:16:01 PM
Quote from: Cain on September 27, 2023, 09:57:40 PM
Turns out making all the doctors and nurses flee to Canada and Australia and then making our immigration system so impossibly frustrating and difficult that no-one wants to come here was not a winning strategy. Who knew?

Try and keep well the best you can, though. I'm sure you've heard it before and know what to do, but fluids and rest, rest and fluids. 4 weeks is quite the ass-kicking, so hopefully it passes soon.

Yeah its been pretty brutal.

Think I'm finally past it now at least. Lingering cough but I'll just have to live with that.

Genuinely horrified at the state of the NHS right now. Hard to see what they're actually going to be selling off when they do finally put it on the auction block.

WELCOME TO AMERICA!  Pool's onna roof.
#27
Quote from: Tinfoilment on September 23, 2023, 09:50:25 AM
opinions on "Don't Let THEM Immanetize the Eschaton"

It's my job. 
#28
Principia Discussion / Re: Local 73rd Hermits Cabal
September 24, 2023, 04:45:59 AM
Quote from: Tinfoilment on September 23, 2023, 09:37:15 AM
Individual called Altered,

why are you even here?

Iffin you want to smash and destroy everything weird, why not convert to Thelema and serve Ra Hoor Khuit?

I disregard your aggro control trip.  Discordianism is chill hippie shit designed to be open-ended. 

Also, I'm even doing it in a formal way that rhymes with the old way.  And this forum is so quiet that there can expected to be nothing new for the next several decades.  Why ban anyone?

How about you fuck off?
#29
Quote from: chaotic neutral observer on September 15, 2023, 11:19:04 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on September 15, 2023, 07:31:26 PM
Sorry, there is no future left.  My generation and the one before mine used it all up.  Sorry about that.

It's the middle of September, and Saskatchewan is still getting air quality warnings because of smoke from wildfires.

After this summer, I'm surprised there's anything left to burn.

There's always more Canada.
#30
How did this ever work out?

I haven't seen the little shitneck since.