Testamonial:  And i have actually gone to a bar and had a bouncer try to start a fight with me on the way in. I broke his teeth out of his fucking mouth and put his face through a passenger side window of a car.

Guess thats what the Internet was build for, pussy motherfuckers taking shit in safety...

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QuoteEtta James who has died aged 73 after suffering from leukaemia, was among the most critically acclaimed and influential female singers of the past 50 years, even if she never achieved huge popular success. From her first R&B hit, in 1955, the risqué Roll With Me Henry – cut when she was only 15 – through a series of classic 1960s soul sides (the lush ballad At Last, the raucous house rocker Tell Mama and the emotional agony of I'd Rather Go Blind), then a series of critically acclaimed 1970s and 1980s albums that won her a broad rock audience, to more recent albums of jazz vocals, James proved capable of developing and changing as an artist.

Such a loss to the world.
Aneristic Illusions / Gaddafi Video - NSFW
December 08, 2011, 04:03:20 PM
jesus I don't know how real this is I question everything I'm shown these days. 


NSFW in any way shape or fashion. 

I was told this will be yanked any time.

I couldn't watch all of it. 

QuoteA Cleveland third grader who weighed more than 200 pounds was taken from his mother after officials reportedly said she did not do enough to help the boy, who suffered from a weight-related health issue, to lose weight.

"They are trying to make it seem like I am unfit, like I don't love my child," the boy's mother, who was not identified, told the Cleveland Plain Dealer. "It's a lifestyle change and they are trying to make it seem like I am not embracing that. It is very hard, but I am trying."

Officials first became aware of the boy's weight after his mother took him to the hospital last year while he was having breathing problems, the newspaper reported. The child was diagnosed with sleep apnea and began to be monitored by social workers while he was enrolled in a program called "Healthy Kids, Healthy Weight" at the Rainbow Babies & Children's Hospital.

The boy lost a few pounds, but recently began to gain some back, the Cleveland Plain Dealer reported. At that point, the Department of Children and Family Services asked a juvenile court for custody of the boy, citing his soaring weight as a form of medical neglect, according to the newspaper.

I have a hard time with this because I think there are children out there whose parents are abusing them in so many ways, however, I also see this as a type of abuse as well.  Having had the opposite problem with my boys (they were always underweight for their height/age according to the charts).  Yet I never once had a fear that anyone would take them from me as otherwise they were perfectly healthy.  Now, they are both almost 6' and still thin but it's not a health concern, they are both extremely active.

The Dr told me Joy was overweight on her last check up.  The Dr suggested a "food diary" which we kept religiously for a month.  Then Joy and I sat down and took a good look at it.  I stopped buying as much junk food snacks for their lunches and after school snacks and we started making an extra effort for all of us to eat healthier with our snacks and the lunches I pack for them, which was the only thing we could find unhealthy in the diary.  Joy has lost 10 pounds, feels a hundred times better and she and I are walking and excercising together.  In the end though, I blame the loss of physical education classes in middle school as much as I do my bad snack choices.

When the schools serve pizza, french fries and peaches in heavy syrup as a well balanced lunch, there is a problem.  However, as a parent, I feel it is ultimately my responsibility that I make sure my child's health, not limited to but including their weight, is healthy and where they should be for their height and age.
I personally would rather see them decriminalize drug and traffic stuff before this.

QuoteThe dispute started last month, when Shawnee County District Attorney Chad Taylor announced that a 10 percent budget cut to his office in 2012 meant he would no longer be prosecuting any of the city's misdemeanors, effective immediately. Topeka city council members say they can't afford the estimated $800,000 yearly cost of prosecuting those misdemeanors and jailing offenders--and that they want the county to continue carrying out misdemeanor prosecutions as it has for the past 25 years. The county continues to insist that the jurisdiction for these prosecutions should shift to city prosecutors, but the Topeka City Council says that none of the city's five attorneys has any recent experience prosecuting domestic violence cases.

Next week, the council will vote on a measure that will strip domestic battery from a list of crimes that are illegal in the city. The vote is a tactical bid to force the county to take those cases on again.

Or Kill Me / The Good Fight
September 27, 2011, 10:06:43 PM
QuoteIn November 1843, the Gettysburg newspaper The Republican Compiler printed what it claimed to be a verbatim report of a speech made to Republican forces by the Reverend Joab Prout, on the eve of the Battle of Brandywine:

"Soldiers - tomorrow morning we will go forth to battle ... your unworthy minister will march with you, invoking God's aid in the fight ... need I exhort you to fight the good fight for your homesteads, and for your wives and children!"

This has been on my mind for a while now.  "The Good Fight" What is this. Is there one left?  People talk a good line about "change" hell, a man won an election on the slogan "Change you can believe in".  Have there been changes?  Of course there have.  Have they been ones we can believe in?  NO. 

So you ask why, why is it so difficult for people to not see what needs to be done, especially when the answers are right in front of their faces?  I think the reason is because no one feels they are fighting for their very existence.  The scary part is they are and they don't even realize it.  Since they have never had to fight for their homes or their families, they can't comprehend what "The Good Fight" actually is.

Miyamoto Musashi said "Everything can collapse. Houses, bodies, and enemies collapse when their rhythm becomes deranged. In large-scale strategy, when the enemy starts to collapse you must pursue him without letting the chance go. If you fail to take advantage of your enemies' collapse, they may recover."

We are at a point of failure.  We have not taken advantage of our enemies collapse, simply because we are our own worst enemy.  Very little that is happening in the world today is something that could not have been stopped before it even started.  For every inch we have gained across the globe, we have lost 6.  The compromise has killed us.  Well not physically killed us, but it has killed something inside of us that recognizes right from wrong, a part of us that knew when our fight was "the Good Fight" and stopped our realization of it becoming the "Ok Whatever Works".

The author Arthur Gordon said "Some people confuse acceptance with apathy, but there's all the difference in the world. Apathy fails to distinguish between what can and what cannot be helped; acceptance makes that distinction. Apathy paralyzes the will-to-action; acceptance frees it by relieving it of impossible burdens."

We have become an apathetic people.  We are paralyzed by our own actions.  We have allowed so many things to "pass along" lost so many inches that now, when we are miles from where we need to be everyone is scrambling for a route to salvation.

It is no wonder a political party that touts Christianity has gained such popularity.  People know there are problems.  People see that things are actually BAD WRONG.  They are desperate for a quick fix solution, never realizing the problem they are trying to fix is years in the making. The problem is, god is not going to fix the problem and I don't know that we have what it takes to do so ourselves.

So where do we turn?  Who do we look to for guidance, leadership, answers?  I would suggest history, as it is bound to repeat itself, however, we do not seem to be able to learn from our mistakes.  Where does that leave us?  Within in 5 years of a downtrodden country, scrambling for food, killing for fresh water, dying for freedoms we gave away long ago.

I don't believe there is a chance for change.  Not because it isn't possible, but because to change our surroundings we must first change ourselves.

Cross posted from EB&G
I see you hiding around corners, lurking behind trees and bushes.  I see you watching the children as they play their silly games in the park.  The children still young enough to think it's a beautiful world and mommy and daddy can fix everything. 

I see your handiwork in the "Hannah Montana" and other celebrities (High School Musical, Gossip Girl) who direct their careers towards elementary school girls and those other young people looking for a hero.  You lure them in young and innocent with all of the glittery room accessories, the baubles and perfumes, the complete makeover kits.  The dolls and the dress up, teaching our daughters that "slutty" is the new black!  And making sure our sons look for girls wearing the new black!

I see you as you follow newly double digit aged kids, those 10-15 year olds who are finding that not only is it not a beautiful world, but mommy and daddy can't even fix themselves, let alone everything.  I see the stain of your touch on those children, their clothes, their iPods and cell phones.  What messages are you whispering in their ears as they walk down the street to the beat of whatever music you have convinced them that they need to listen too.  I see your plan, you decide who and what is "cool" and then you get them young.  But I question who is truly working for you, the kids who everyone wants to be like, or the kids they torment into shooting the school to hell?

I see you as you struggle to maintain your control over the young twenty something kids who have started asking questions you really don't want to answer for fear they will see you as the lie you are.  You start losing control as they start developing lives, ideas and ideals of their own.  Well you lose a few.  Less that you did 20 years ago, but hopefully more than you will 5 years from now. 

That is my hope, that the generation that is coming into its own now has the wherewithal to stand up and put a stop to you, to your lies.  That they will be strong where we were weak, educated where we were ignorant, and brave where we ran off to do something else.

Because I have to have hope in something, so I'm putting it into the children we've raised with the knowledge, strength and bravery we didn't have.  That they will either rise as an example or lead others in the struggle to survive.

Or else it was all for nothing.
I'll start.....


QuoteRye Playland was shut down Tuesday after cops scuffled with Muslims upset that women wearing head scarves were barred from the rides, witnesses said.

Fifteen people, including three women, were charged with disorderly conduct and assault in the chaos, authorities said.

The article goes on to say that...

QuoteThe ban, which is not Muslim specific, was imposed about 3 years ago mostly to prevent hats from falling onto the tracks of roller coasters and other rides, park officials said.

I don't think that's going to fly with this one though.  :sad:
I have a decent beef Ragu recipe, but I saw this one online for pork and I wondered if anyone else made it and what you used.....

2 pounds pork shoulder roast, cut into cubes
1 teaspoon dried rosemary leaves, crumbled
1 teaspoon dried thyme leaves
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 onion, diced
1 carrot, peeled and diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 cup dry red wine
1 (28 ounce) can diced tomatoes
1 cup chicken stock


1.Season pork with the rosemary, thyme, pepper, and salt. Heat oil in a large large Dutch over over medium-high heat. Sear pork in the hot oil until well browned on all sides, about 10 minutes.

2.Stir onion and carrot into pot; cook until onion is soft, about 3 minutes. Add the garlic and cook until fragrant, about 1 minute.

3.Pour in the wine; stir, scraping the bottom of the pot to release any browned bits from the bottom. Stir in the tomatoes and stock. Bring to a simmer; cook until meat is very tender and the sauce has thickened, about 30 minutes.

QuoteWASHINGTON (AP) -- Discouraging economic data from around the globe have heightened fears that another recession is on the way.

Fresh evidence emerged Thursday that U.S. home sales and manufacturing are weakening. Signs also surfaced that European banks are increasingly burdened by the region's debt crisis and sputtering economy.

The rising anxiety ignited a huge sell-off in stocks that led many investors to seek the safety of U.S. Treasurys.

Am I the only person who didn't realize we were out of the last recession?
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / ATTN: iarmit
August 17, 2011, 05:40:41 PM
Every time I see your user name I see armpit......

Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / ATTN Tucson
July 08, 2011, 06:08:38 PM
Do with this as you see fit......

QuoteTucson Area Wiccan/Pagan Network (TAWN) July Cauldronluck
Our monthly Meet & Greet! Come hobnob with Tucson's Pagans, Heathens, Polytheists & others of like mind! Sunday, July 10, La Madera Park, Florence Dr. & Treat Ave., Tucson, AZ. Business meeting from 11am-noon; potluck from noon-1pm. Please bring a dish to share; this month's food theme is "Melon Madness". Free, but donations to the cause are always welcome. More information,

Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / ATTN MR LMNO
July 08, 2011, 02:35:10 PM
US Department of Education
Alphabet© Division
Agent 5-69

Dear Mr. LMNO;

We are writing you to inform you that it has been brought to our attention that you have been using multiple letters from the Alphabet© without the proper applications being submitted for approval.  These letters, capitol L, capitol M, capitol N and capitol O are not just there for you to toy with as you see fit.  These letters are sacred and should be treated as such.  Not tossed around on subversive internet sites as if they were common.

These letters sir are subject to the copywrite laws and not only have individual copywrite but group ones as well.  To use these letters without the proper approval should be illegal. 

As well, we have been made aware of your degenerative behavior and the fact that you play that rock and roll music in public.  Not only that, but you have shown a continued play on innuendo in circumstances that are a bit sketchy.  The worse however is this Mr. LMNO.  We have been told, and sent pictures as evidence, that you Mr. LMNO, are a hipster.

How can you face the children at the local bus stop every morning knowing that you are misrepresenting the sanctity and virtue of our Alphabet ©.  Think of the children sir.  Think of them learning their letters and the trauma that they will face each time they reach the letter K.  Their little faces scrunched in fear and confusion.  What if they follow your wayward example and they themselves play that rock and roll or worse, become hipsters?  How can you live with yourself is beyond our comprehension.

You will need to complete the following forms in order to use the capitol L, capitol M, capitol N and capitol O.  Form 328B-4, Form B-52, Form FU-69, Form JK-9 parts A, B and E.  In addition we will need no less than 5 character references stating that you have turned your back on your wicked ways and will represent our capitol L, capitol M, capitol N and capitol O in a manner becoming them.

We are demanding that you cease and desist immediately, if not sooner, the use of our precious capitol L, capitol M, capitol N and capitol O until such time your applications are approved.  For the duration we will allow you the use of the little l, little m, little n and little o.

This is a serious matter sir, and we will be keeping tabs on the situation.  It is not just everyone who is allowed the use of our capitol L, capitol M, capitol N and capitol O.  Remember that. 


Geraldine Q. Washerburgensen
Department Head

Or Kill Me / Never borrow the Emperor's clothes....
June 15, 2011, 04:49:30 PM
Hey look at me....  Yes you there doing your own thing, minding your own business...


Because that is what it is, that attention whoring, drama llama bullshit.  The whining and the bitching and the everything is wrong with my life or even worse, the bragging as if the people around them are just too mundane to have anything good to talk about themselves.  And you know, it's ok, everyone needs to vent and everyone wants to share good news.

The problem arises when that is all that happens.  You vent and vent and vent some more, completely ignoring any advice that you might be given by people who have been in your situation and may G*A*S*P know a little something about fixing your fucking problem, or at least relieving a bit of your pain.  Or you brag and brag and just don't notice that people have pretty much started ignoring you because they are sick of it. 

So what is the need people have to continuously be the center of attention.  I used to think it was just crappy parenting.  I don't know anymore.  I think some people are just hardwired to believe that their personal lives are far more important to the people around them, more imprtant than say the people's actual lives.

My biggest issue with people like this is the typical..... "Oh lookie, this is what is happening to me....." and when they are given serious advice on how to correct the situation, congratulations or just a LOL, they completely ignore it.  Or they pick out one line of a paragraph of information and THAT is the only thing they have anything to comment on. 

The thing is, this happens everywhere.  We all have that person we work with who you just avoid.  The neighbor you drive past your own driveway to avoid.  The clerk at the grocery, the waitress at the local bar, online, offline, they are everywhere.  Then you have the person being the drama llama, they look around one day and realize they have driven off evry person they thought were their friend and then have the nerve to blame the friends instead of wondering maybe, just maybe if they had done something.

People just don't want the added drama. 

I find that very rarely does anyone have the heart, balls or maybe stupidity to tell this person.....  "You are a fucking drama whore and you need to shut the fuck up and listen instead of continuously bitching and/or moaning and/or bragging." 

Or maybe just a simple, "You know, that outfit looked nice on the Emperor when he wore it."

Dear TCC Refugees:

Weclome to  I have volunteered to act as your benevolent liason for your first few days/weeks here, or until you make 50 posts, at which time all deals are off. For your first 50 posts I can, with some certainty, promise you will not be verbally assaulted, WOMPed, made extreme fun of, or put in time out.  Well we actually don't have time out, we just give you shit till you run away screaming. 

Anyway, you will find available for your amusement, horror or quite possibly abject terror a variety of threads here on the board.  If you find a running story line, please, feel free to join in.  If we hate it, it will not be deleted but we will make terrible fun of you to our own amusement.

On this board we have very few rules. Please refer to this thread for those rules We don't care if you curse, we aren't going to get butthurt if you insult anyone, in truth, for the most part we are all big live and let live advocates.

However, there are a few things you might want to avoid doing because even I, your benevolent liason cannot save you if you.... act like a complete douche, tell us how to be really real discordians, are unable to defend your position, or, and this is a big one, you forget to send a bottle of 30 year old scotch to the managment, our God Payne, Goddess Pixie and most important, our God and Spiritual advisor, The Good Reverend Roger.   You might want to send a pint to everyone else on the board, but that's not required.

I wish you all the best and look forward to seeing what you can do in a truly free environment.

Love and Arsenic,

Or Kill Me / The Apathy of Maybe....
April 05, 2011, 04:34:16 PM
I'm tired.  I'm tired of being told what to think, how to feel or what pill to take when I don't conform. 

I'm tired of watching the world around me fall into the great shithole of stupidity and knowing that while there have been great people in the past, who have set out to achieve change and to try to make things better and actually accomplished those goals, I'm not one of those people.  I used to be angry that I let things like that bother me, these days I just want to watch it all burn.

Maybe I should strive to be a world changer and it's quite possible my irritation with myself is over my own apathy rather than my impotence.  Maybe I do have the ability to make real changes in the world around me.  Maybe I can be the difference I want to see.

Then again, maybe the world isn't as terrible as I think it is and it's my own chaotic life I see going down the shithole.  Or maybe I'm sick after a long, cold, snowy winter and I just need a good dose of sunshine. 

Or maybe it's just time I stopped letting the monkeys get to me and work harder on enjoying the ride.

I can 'maybe' myself into or out of any situation and in truth don't we all?  Don't we all try to justify our activism or lack thereof, do we not all rage for or against The Machine ™ at some time or another. 

Do we not 'maybe' ourselves thru the hour, day, week, month..... 

Yes there are terrible horrible things happening out there in the world.  Yes, if we banned enough together we might actually achieve change.  The real question is these days, "Do we want to?"

So here is what I've decided for myself.  I'm getting back on that highway and I'm going to drive like there is no tomorrow until there is no tomorrow.  I can't fix the world and at this point, I no longer want to try.

But I am damn well going to enjoy its collapse. 

So what the fuck are you going to do?

When I wake up in the morning at the end of fucking March, this is not what I expect to see, nor am I happy about the fucking sleet and freezing rain to follow this shit!  

I mean seriously, have I not been loyal?  Have I not harassed the harassable, tormented the tormentable, spread chaos and discord every where I go?  I mean seriously do you fucking want my oldest male child because lemme tell ya he ain't all that....

Please to be fixing the St. Louis weather as soon as possible!

Thank you!!!
#18 explain the attraction, the humor of "JackAss". 
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / How Long?
February 28, 2011, 06:38:01 PM
This can be moved, I really debated which thread this belonged in and just couldn't decide....

How long before we see the kind of protesting that is/was going on in Egypt and Libya here in the US?

Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / Email Advice
February 18, 2011, 05:34:06 PM
I need a new email account to use for my contact with the kid's dad. 

Yahoo does not offer a read receipt.  Neither does GMail.

Do y'all know of any free emails out there that do have that option?

I want to be able to prove I've complied with the court order and so forth, so if anyone has a better suggestion or something..... 

CCing my lawyer is a GREAT idea, problem is he will charge me so not so great.
Or Kill Me / An Open Apology
February 15, 2011, 08:51:17 PM
To the world at large.....

PD I owe you an apology.

I've determined that while I was fully aware I wasn't the sharpest tool here at PD, the concept that I could still hold my own in a discussion was a sad mistake on my part.

I can't and it has become glaringly obvious to me.  I must come across as either a complete idiot with the biggest pile of crap for brains ever or an autistic three year old.  Either is possible considering the pats on the head and the "oh you just don't get it" comments I keep getting.

So PD, I apologize and will, from this point forward, limit any and all of my comments to things I know about.  Food, children and well ummmm, yep that's about it. 

So sorry to have wasted your and my time in all my years of comments, rants and other posts before today.  It took me a while to realize how stupid I come across but yanno what it's ok.  I get it now!

Better late than never right!!  :wink:
...wanted to know about me right here... IN THIS THREAD....

Seems I have been slipping up with my alt account.  I forgot who I was.  So as it is easier to be me than someone else and since my lawyer has said ok...  here you go on the trials and insanity of why I haven't been around, that you knew......   :wink:

Well, it sucks to be you guys today.  I'm fixing to give you more information than you have ever wanted to know about me.  Might explain a whole lot of why I am the bitch I am today.....

First off, just a touch of background.

Yeah, it wasn't a pretty time in my life.  This is, thank god, one of only two articles still floating around out there that has my name in it.  The articles with the kid's names are finally lost in cyberspace. 

So life was crazy. I was paying off the husband's debts trying to keep the crack dealing mother fuckers from hurting my kids.  I had finally gotten my shit into something resembling a life and then.....


They let the fucker go.  Yeah, the decision came over one day and he walked out of prison a free man the next. 

Victim's Assistance put us (me and the kids) in the local shelter.  When my sister-in-law tried to get my kids out of school a couple of days after their dad's release, we had to pull them out. 

That was when we were moved up north.  We went into the system.  Lived in this shelter and that shelter.  I basically homeschooled the kids for the rest of that year while we bounced around finally landing here in St. Louis and a "transitional" program. 

For the first two years up here, we were terrified to say anything to anyone.  I had been told the next step if their dad found us was identity change and I would lose all contact with my family.  So I made no friends, the kids tried but it was difficult since the wrong slip and someone would Google one of the kids or me and I'd end up putting them in yet another school.

The program we were put into was a very badly run program.  The damage to the kids and I both mentally and emotionally is something we are still working on.

Then their dad started trying to contact us.  He was sending letters to my dad who would in turn send everything to us here in St. Louis.  This worked really well until Dad died.  A letter sent, not forwarded, then returned and we were found.  Our only option with Victim's Assistance was to be moved to another state and put into another program.  Or I could stand my ground. 

So I stood. (Thanks Roger!!!)  I filed for divorce.  It has gotten really really ugly.  A stupid reference on my fucking facebook page gave him this place.  Then he started harassing me about everything I said or did here at PD, facebook.  Tried the she's a witch I deserve custody trick, oh she admits to smoking weed online and so on.

Then came the day.  I had a court appearance for a restraining order.  While I was in court, he was in St. Louis trying to get my kids from their school.  That same day the PI we had out in California said he hadn't left the house since the Friday before.  But he wasn't in his house in California, he was in fucking St. Louis trying to get my fucking kids out of their school.  The judge denied the restraining order because he was no danger to me in California (fucking PI).  He didn't get the kids but he managed to piss me off royally.  It was a couple of days after that when the shit completely hit the fan and I had to start an account here at PD their dad wouldn't know was me.

Now in the course of all of this shit 2006 to current, both of my parents have died, and I had the summer from hell.  I'm not going to drag anyone into the whole insanity.  My blog is open to the public now.

So why, you ask, am I just now posting all of this?  Could it be my divorce is final after all this time?  No it isn't.  But the lawyers met yesterday over the separation, custody, child support and legal fee agreement and as long as I don't tell any lies about the kid's dad, there is nothing I post here he can use against me.  I go to court Monday to finalize this so the divorce can progress.  There are too many people along with the court system who know where I am now that he can't kill me.  So I've gotten another piece of my life back.

The funny part is, I've been here all along.  Posting, trying to play, being the same person I've always been, just new.  I've had my ass handed to me more than once and I've realized a lot about people I thought I knew better. 

Be that as it may, I'm fucking back.  Like me, hate me, or just don't give a flying fuck, it's all good.  I'm back and I'm me again.

Yeah, that's me.  You see I have a life or what can loosely be comapred to one.  And while I don't talk about it in detail, let's just say that for a while now it has sucked ass beyond comprehension.

Basically I'm just fucking toxic these days and I'm sure my posts and responses to people have reflected that.  I'm really sorry by the way, I hope it can be looked over or forgotten!! 

So I'm going to take a break.  Keep my shit together and plow through the next few months.  If I come back, you will know I survived and if I don't survive it, you'll read about it on the news.

I'm sure many of you really don't like me much, I'm sorry if it's because of my venom here lately.  It truly wasn't because of anyone here that I'm such a fucking cunt.  Life is kicking my ass 6 ways to Sunday and you know what, god doesn't give a flying fuck.  Or at least he doesn't return phone calls.

And to my friends here, some of you know the score, and if you don't thank your lucky stars because my garbage is not something you ever want to have to watch me sort through.  It's rank and ugly and like me, not fit for human association.

Try and play nice with each other, and if you can't, try and let it roll.  Y'all have held me up during a shithole year and most of you didn't even know it!  So much love and GASM a bit for me! 
I have in my posession, well on my cell phone, 3 horribly terrific pictures from Fantasy Fest this weekend.  They've been kicked off photobucket 3 times now and I have an "official" warning!

I will gladly text them to anyone who can post them here! 

Giant penis aside, they are truly typical Key West behavior and nothing like your usual, It almost looks like the porn convention just partnered with Fantasy Fest!!!

PM me and I'll message them or email them to you!!! :lulz:
I am going out to buy a new laptop.  I really want one that I can use something like boingo or some such for the open wireless as I am surrounded by coffee shops, libraries and so on and don't necessarily need an actual service if I understand correctly.

So, tell me what it is I'm asking for so I don't look any more stupid than I have too!  :lulz:

Thanks in advance!!!

QuoteDeepak Chopra, woo guru extraordinaire, accepted blame for the 7.2-magnitude earthquake in Baja California via Twitter. Seriously.

Tweeted this twit to his 179,000 followers:

Had a powerful meditation just now – caused an earthquake in Southern California.
3:56 PM Apr 4th via TweetDeck

Was meditating on Shiva mantra & earth began to shake. Sorry about that
3:59 PM Apr 4th via TweetDeck

QuoteSeveral days after the fact, there is no reference whatsoever to be found on the Huffington Post to HuffPo woo-guru Deepak Chopra's bizarre claim to have caused an earthquake through meditation.

Earlier this week, Deepak Chopra announced via Twitter that he'd caused an earthquake by meditating. He also promised not to do it again. At no point did he declare his comments a joke; considering the deaths, injuries, and property damage resulting from the Baja California temblor, a joke would certainly have been in poor taste.

I'm at the point of  :lulz: or  :argh!: and....  :horrormirth:

So can the victims sue this fucker?  Because he is loaded!!!
Or Kill Me / Even when you expect it....
May 23, 2010, 04:17:59 PM
I've said since my mom died I was just waiting for the phone call.  I've talked about it for almost 4 years now.  I've imagined almost every scenario.  I was prepared yanno?

Well I realized yesterday nothing prepares you for that call. You still have the shock, the confusion and for me, having to go home, this overwhelming fear.

I think a long as he was there I felt safe becuse there was one person left out there who had to love me.

So now I'm flying home tomorrow to do what I've been expecting to have to do for how long now. 

Only I wasn't prepared yanno?
You know, I really thought I had it under control.  Maybe not organized, or in any way efficient, but by god it seemed manageable.  You know how it goes Dok, you wake up one morning and there is nothing to give you a clue that everything is fixing to go right down the shitter. 

There aren't warning signs or unexplainable astrological events.  Unwashed prophets of doom really don't come up and warn you.  Shit just fucking happens.  You ride it through and hope you're not broken at the end.  That's life right?  Just one ride after another?  Some days you're on the monorail and some days you're hanging upside down 100 miles per hours wishing you could just get the fuck off because otherwise you're gonna puke all over those people down there.  Unfortunately, it's been too many years since I was able to enjoy the luxury of the monorail.  The last couple of weeks though, have been above and beyond the usual insanity of my normal chaos.

So I've gotten to the point of worrying that maybe I'm doing it all wrong

I have to wonder if it's really this hard for the monkeys?  I mean, maybe there is a safety net in the stupidity?  Maybe if you are just too damn dumb to realize the train is coming, it won't hit you when you don't get off the track because the powers that be save the stupid.

Then I wonder if all the effort to remain upright is really worth it?  If you think about it, those damn monkeys sure seem awfully happy.  Of course sometimes it's hard to tell the difference between their laughing and my screaming.  But that's just me right?

Look around at them.  They all seem to be doing fine.  Believing what they are told to believe.  Going where they are told to go and once there doing what they are told to do.  They will spend their entire lives following directions.  Of course that glazed look in their eyes, it's not because behind their eyes their brain is running around in their skull screaming for a bullet right?

Because after the last couple of years stuck on Mr. Toad's wild ride....   I'm really beginning to wonder if a working brain is all it's cracked up to be!

Maybe I just need to shoot someone.....  it's been a while!

First, let me start with I don't mind the banner advertising and this isn't me bitching about that.  Hell I get a kick out of some of them.  This one is new to me and I just had to share.....


I just want to know which one of you spags did this because it's funny as hell!
OK so a little background.  Single mom, idiot kid's father no child support, I need help so, I used to get food stamps and medical for the kids from the state.

I lost my foodstamps because this idiot stupid bitch cunt I worked for part time FOR CASH ONLY reported income for me that I never received.  I had to fight it.  It's taken 6 months and I just won my appeal pending a final interview which was scheduled for today.  Now please note this is completely seperate from the medical which I didn't lose but had to renew last month.

I dropped off all of my paper work for both medical AND food stamps last month.  I did it the same day I had the lumbar puncture for the MS so I know what day I dropped it off not to mention the receipt I have for it.

The stupid ignorant cunt scheduled my interview today.  I figured she worked for the people, who knew what was going on.  I also thought the interview was just for the foodstamps, that the medical renewal was ok since I received a letter saying there was no change in the kid's medical.

During the interview, she informs me I lost my medical for the kids because I gave her the renewal stuff too late, it was due before April 30th.  WTF WTF WTF????  I (very very nicely) informed her I had turned it all in to her on the 21st.  She then says yeah I know but I didn't enter any of it because I had scheduled this interview today.  Then she says and I quote "Oh well, it's just a 3 month lapse and you can re-apply for medical"  WTF WTF??  So I again (very nicely) tell her I do not feel I should be held responsible for turning everything in late just because she didn't enter it into the system in a timely manner and why did I receive this letter if things weren't ok?  She mumbles a bit and then says "Well I will try to fix it."  I told her that it would be best for me if she did more than try.  My kids have to have medical (hello what 4 broken bones this year?)

Then she says.... "The good news is it looks like you will get your food stamps back"

Oh yay!

Discordian Recipes / FRIED GREEN TOMATOES
April 12, 2010, 02:59:04 PM
Yeah I'm going there....  :lulz:

You will need....

Panko bread crumbs
Corn flour (NOT corn meal) if you can't find, mix 3/4 cup cake flour with a 1/4 cup fine cornmeal. This makes a difference, plain flour, even cake, can get gummy.
French fried onions (about 1/2 a cup)
egg or eggbeaters
oil of choice - I used canola
sea salt - I tried smoked this weekend (thanks ECH) and it was terrific.
chili pepper
2-3 large green tomatoes

There is some debate on a couple of things to do before you fry your tomato slices.  Skin on or off?  Do you seed them first?

I leave the skin on if I am doing slices 1/4 inch or less because without the skin they tend to fall apart.  I always seed my tomaotoes before frying.

So, cut your tomato slices approx 1/4 in thick and lay on a wire rack over a pan.  Salt the slices and let sit for about 1/2 an hour until the jelly and seeds have leaked out.

While the slices are sitting, take your french fried onions and lay them out on a baking sheet, pop them under the broiler for maybe 2-3 minutes until crunchy but not burnt.  Let cool then grind them in the food processor.

Mix the onions with your panko about 2 pank to one onion. (this combination is also great on fish and chicken).  Beat your egg in a bowl.  Pour some corn flour in yet another bowl.

Get your skillet out and turn on the heat.  Pour the oil in and let it get all shimmery!  Just enough to cover the bottom.

Rinse off the tomato slices and pat dry, sprinkle lightly with salt, pepper and chili pepper if you choose to use it. I wouldn't put chili pepper on both sides.  Dip into the corn flour, shake, in the egg, then into the panko and onion mixture.  Put them in the oil and fry until a nice golden brown. Watch them, you don't want the tomato to get crunchy, just the coating.

Now you have your leftover tomato jelly and seeds. Run that through a strainer to catch the seeds.  Mix the jelly with a bit of white wine vinegar, olive oil, garlic, whatever makes you happy herb wise and use on a micro green salad as dressing.  The jelly gives it a really nice boost.

Edited because I cannot spell.....
Or Kill Me / Hey Dok, frankly I don’t give a……
March 25, 2010, 01:27:35 PM
Let's talk about the south and the "southern belle".  Many people see movies like "Fried Green Tomatoes" or "The Secret's of the YaYa Sisterhood" and think that is what a modern southern belle is.  They couldn't be farther from the truth.

The south doesn't want their daughters raised like Scarlett, they want Melanie.  Sweet, gentile, compromising, forgiving, enabling, the very picture of southern grace and charm.

Grace and charm...... grace and charm.... sounds like cake ingredients doesn't it?  A pinch of grace and a dash of charm and stir.  What are little girls made of?  Sugar and spice and everything nice?

And this, these ideas, these archaic beliefs that women are fragile and unable to stand up for themselves, that women are stupid.  Where do they come from?  Well we all know where they originated, problem is few people realize just how much they are continued in the south.  Yes even today. 

They teach you that you know.  In charm school.  And yes it is called charm school.  You start when you are in the first grade.  The first things they teach you is how to sit, stand, walk, talk, what to do with your hands during any situation, how to shake hands, how never to cross your legs at the knee, but to tuck them to the side crossed at the ankles.  Then they move into meals and tables, how to set a table for 1-12 courses, 5 to 500 people.  What piece of cutlery goes with what food.  When to have finger bowls and when not to. Menus and music for any size event.  What to wear and when to wear it because no self respecting southern girl wears white shoes after labor day by god and won't put on a pair again until Easter Sunday. 

Then, starting around 4th grade, they start with the how to be stupid classes.  Well not how to be stupid, just how to make everyone around you think you are.  Well not everyone, just men.  And they tell you it's to keep the men happy.  That way they can feel all big and macho taking care of the "little woman".  You learn how to avert your eyes and laugh a little when asked about something you know damn well how to do, but it's a man's job to do it.  They teach you how to appear interested in what "the man" is interested in.  They give you just enough information on a variety of topics to make you either dangerous or stupid.  Then they show you how to turn it to stupid.  You learn how to be touchy feely.  How to lightly place your hand on the man's arm or shoulder to keep his attention because men are physical beings you know.   As for taking care of your man, well now why do you think we all still cook the way we do?  Keep 'em fat and happy!! (wink wink)

And so many women don't know how to be strong, or that they are even allowed to be.  They are scared and many are miserable and in miserable situations because they don't have any idea what to do on their own.  Mothers and friends will tell a woman with a cheating husband to be "more generous" in the bedroom.  They will tell a woman who has been beaten by her spouse to avoid the things that set him off and to make the home a safe, quiet place for him to come home to.  If they even hear about the abuse at all because in the south, what happens behind closed doors stays there.  God help the person who breaks that sanctity. 

I'm not in a position to talk.  I didn't leave the bullshit behind closed doors.  My dirty laundry was all over for the world to see.  They didn't actually come and take away my "southern belle tiara" but they may as well have.  Nobody and I mean absolutely nobody can do the "shunning" better than the south.  Once that door is closed, Robert E. Lee back from the dead couldn't open it.  I'm like that divorced cousin everyone wants at their parties to liven up the party but doesn't want to stay the night.

And then we come to today.  I haven't lived in the south for a couple of decades but I know they still offer these classes because if nothing else, southerners are serious about their roots and their traditions.  There are still cotillions and sweet 16 balls.  And because I get a letter every year letting me know that they are still holding a place for my daughter and it's never too late to start.

But what have these idiotic ideas of how a woman should act, talk, walk, dress, speak affected the women of the south?  Well actually it is not as bad as one might think.  Why you ask?  Because we learned the pretend to be stupid thing really well.  Very few realize just how smart we are!  And as for my generation, they won't learn it from us!  Because as long as you keep on thinking I'm stupid, I can keep on surprising you!

As for my daughter?  Well I keep trying to convince a certain hero of mine to start her own version of "Charm School" that will teach my daughter to kick ass and take names and wear whatever fucking color of shoes she wants year round! 
Or Kill Me / Nothing will make them happy....
March 15, 2010, 06:11:40 PM
Nothing will make them happy.

You know who they are.  There is one or sometimes a few in every type of group you can possibly conceive.  And because of them, there will never be a simple solution to anything.  Why?  Because there is always someone or some group which has to bitch just for the sake of bitching.  Those who will find one point out of thousands to nitpick until the whole project gets the shitcan because the arguing has cost more than the actual results would have.  And these people are everywhere.  You all know one or two personally.  You've all wanted to smack the shit out of them on more than on occasion

They say they want to be treated like everyone else.  They don't.  It's a lie.  They only say that so they look like they are trying to be cooperative.  They say that equality is essential.  They just don't mention that it isn't essential for everyone.  They say they are group players, team players and so on.  LIE, LIE, LIE!!

So now we come to the issue of, how the hell do you deal with people like this?  I have found a way that has been working for quite a while now.  You repeat back to them what they say and make sure you add "Just to clarify" or something along those lines.  For example, you present to the PTA a fundraising idea that could bring in a lot of money.  Requires no effort on the school's part.  Just the selling of a few raffle tickets...  Of course Mrs. Fuckerupper in the front row raises the first objection. 

"I don't think this will work, we've never done anything like this before. "

Your response would be....  "Let me clarify Mrs. Fuckerupper, because we've never done this before you don't think this will work, and as a result of that thinking we should just shit can the whole raffle and not try and see how much we can raise.  Knowing that other schools in the district have raised $$$ amount?"

See what I mean?

My grandpa used to say "Some people would bitch if they were hung with a new rope"  It took me years to realize they still should be hung, no matter what kind of rope was used.
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / I see you...
January 27, 2010, 09:01:36 PM
I see you hiding around corners, lurking behind trees and bushes.  I see you watching the children as they play their silly games in the park.  The children still young enough to think it's a beautiful world and mommy and daddy can fix everything. 

I see your handiwork in the "Hannah Montana" and other celebrities (High School Musical, Gossip Girl) who direct their careers towards elementary school girls and those other young people looking for a hero.  You lure them in young and innocent with all of the glittery room accessories, the baubles and perfumes, the complete makeover kits.  The dolls and the dress up, teaching our daughters that "slutty" is the new black!  And making sure our sons look for girls wearing the new black!

I see you as you follow newly double digit aged kids, those 10-15 year olds who are finding that not only is it not a beautiful world, but mommy and daddy can't even fix themselves, let alone everything.  I see the stain of your touch on those children, their clothes, their iPods and cell phones.  What messages are you whispering in their ears as they walk down the street to the beat of whatever music you have convinced them that they need to listen too.  I see your plan, you decide who and what is "cool" and then you get them young.  But I question who is truly working for you, the kids who everyone wants to be like, or the kids they torment into shooting the school to hell?

I see you as you struggle to maintain your control over the young twenty something kids who have started asking questions you really don't want to answer for fear they will see you as the lie you are.  You start losing control as they start developing lives, ideas and ideals of their own.  Well you lose a few.  Less that you did 20 years ago, but hopefully more than you will 5 years from now. 

That is my hope, that the generation that is coming into its own now has the wherewithal to stand up and put a stop to you, to your lies.  That they will be strong where we were weak, educated where we were ignorant, and brave where we ran off to do something else.

Because I have to have hope in something, so I'm putting it into the children I've raised with the knowledge, strength and bravery I didn't have.  That they will either rise as an example or lead others in the struggle to survive.

I'll start because I'm gone for the rest of the week!

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday no matter how you choose to celebrate it or who your celebrating with!!  :lulz:

Eat too much, drink too much and party like it's 2012....   :|

Seriously, y'all have a good one!!! 

Discordian Recipes / Brunswick Stew
December 21, 2009, 03:13:37 PM
I think this is the catch all of soups/stews.  It was always the one my grandma made when she had a little of this and a little of that left over and wanted to cleanout the freezer/fridge.  Anyway, I had a hankering and this is what I ended up with....

1 whole chicken
about 1 1/2 pounds of leftover pork roast
same of pot roast
couple/three of bags of frozen mix veggies  - or whatever leftover or fresh veg you want to add
10 small potatoes peeled and diced
2 cans cream style corn - must have
4 cans whole tomatoes
4 stalks celery small dice
1 large or 2 small onions diced chunky

3 cloves garlic minced, a pinch of sage, 3 pinches of pepperocino, about 3 tsp fresh ground black pepper, I had leftover parsley and chopped about 1 cup up, added another bay leaf and about 5 scrapes from a nutmeg nut.  Add this with the chicken to the soup.

Cover the chicken with well salted water, add celery, couple of crushed garlic cloves, onion, bay leaf and a touch of sage.  Make sure you skim well, not only for foam but fat as the stock is the base of your soup. 

When the chicken is about halfway done, start a pot of well salted water, add the usual herb and add your veg... no tomatoes, potatoes or celery.

While this is happening, you can chop your fresh veg and shred your pork and beef.

When chicken is done take out and strain the stick into a large bowl.  Add about 3/4 the stock back into the pot with the pork and beef.  Strain your veg (keep veg stock to the side) add veg, tomatoes and onions.  (NO not the celery or potatoes yet....  :D)

Let this simmer while your chicken cools and then shred the chicken and add back into the soup with the herbs.  Bring to a full boil.  Add both cans of creamed corn.  Bring back to a boil.  Add your potatoes and celery.  Let simmer and go watch football....  Except don't bother watching the Rams, they suck ass!!!  When the potatoes and celery are done, so is the soup. 

This is supposed to be a very thick stew, but if it is too thick you can thin it with the leftover veg stock.  Remember to shred your meat, don't chunk it, that is one of the things with this stew...

Eat with crusty bread and if you have leftovers they freeze really well!!!

I hear screaming.  I hear them in my sleep and when I am awake. They aren't screams of fear.  Not screams of pleasure either.  Not screams of anger or despair either.  They speak to me, to that point within my heart that I haven't burnt black to harden to the world around me.  To the life I spend each day walking through.

The screams that speak to me, that surround me in waves, they hurt.  I cannot fix what is causing the screams. I cannot find a cure for them.  Who can?  We all watch the news.  We all see what is happening.  They may not want us to know, but we do. 

The screams know.  You can hear it in the drawn out notes.  The knowledge of what is really going on.  The horror of what life on this stupid little planet has come to.  You hear that in the screams too.  But there is no fear of the horror, just an understanding.  Yet, while the screams understand, there is no acceptance in them.  The fight is still there in the lingering seconds between what I assume are breaths.  The screams still have some fight in them.  Somewhere in there.

I hear screaming.

Oh wait, it's me.
Two vast and trunkless legs of stone / Paid to Blog??
October 26, 2009, 09:16:41 PM

Is this true?  Is anyone here getting paid to Blog?  And if so, can you tell me how to do this for $$$???
Bring and Brag / Contradiction
October 02, 2009, 05:12:55 PM
My oldest wrote this for a thing in school, I thought it was cool so I decided to share.....

You are the water in the pool,
And the floats for the kids in the pool.
You are the trees in the park,
And the grass in the fields.
You are the sun in the sky,
And the warm heat of the summer.

However you are not the vinegar on the PB and J sandwich,
And not the water on the carpet,
Or the soda on the rug.
It couldn't be possible that you are a gun in the classroom,
And you couldn't be the cheese in the freezer.

You might be the birds in the trees,
Maybe even the bugs under a rotting log,
But you could never be
The dress on a man.

Whenever you take a quick glance you will see,
That you are neither the plants in a windowless basement,
Nor the lake in the middle of the desert.

You most likely would like to know,
Speaking of things that belong and don't,
That I am the desks in the classrooms.

I also just happen to be the lights in the room,
The dumpsters in the alley,
And the clouds in the sky.

I am also the moon in a sky on a dark night,
And the field on the farm.
But don't worry; I'm not the water in the pool.
You are still the water in the pool,
And always will be the water in the pool,
And somehow yet some way you are the floats for the kids.
Discordian Recipes / Thanksgiving Ideas?
November 14, 2008, 06:56:01 PM
The kids and I are eating at a friend's this year and I am scrambling for something different to take.

I am already taking.....

Pecan Pie
Sweet Potatos w/ the marshmellows thing

I need a vegetable idea and maybe a meat alternative...

Or Kill Me / I have a name for that...
June 12, 2008, 08:30:59 PM
I am so tired of the excuses the world is giving people today for what is really their own stupid bullshit.  Adults are obese because fast food restaurants sell fattening food.  Children are obese because of video games.  Why are they no longer just plain fat and they sit on their asses too much.  Instead of putting down that double quarter pounder and super size fries and walking around the block a time or two, they blame advertising and the world.  Parents don't make their kids go outside to play, they sit on their ass, eat cheetos and play the fucking game.

People are no longer retarded, they are challenged or special or we have come up with a myriad of names for their various diseases.  Children are no longer mouthy little shits who need a good swat on the ass; they have ODD (oppositional defiance disorder).  They tried to tell me my son had this, after being grounded for almost a year and getting a few harsh lessons in how to respect ones elders, he was miraculously cured.

Now we have everyone saying that the economy and the "bad" neighborhoods and the gangs are turning our youth into thugs or killers or whatever word they decide to use.  My question is this, WHY THE FUCK are these kids out on the fucking street at 2 in the morning with guns to begin with?  Where are these kid's parents?  Why didn't they take some parental control? 

This generation has done nothing but give excuses for things which used to be unacceptable.  Things for which every effort was made to change them.  Now we don't make people change, we just give them a name for whatever fuck up thing they have ALLOWED themselves to become.  I'm fat, it's my fault.  I know that krispy kremes make me fat, I still ate them.  So instead of blaming anyone but myself, I stopped eating all the bullshit and lost a hundred pounds.  Without Weight Watchers or Jenny Craig or any other bullshit.  It's called self control. 

I live in the crappiest neighborhood in the inner city of St. Louis.  My kid is not out on the streets at 2 am with a gun, because I took control of that as well.

It's time we started making people take responsibility for their own fuck ups and quit giving them excuses or naming their issue and making it a disease, disorder or issue!

Until we do, when we wonder why the world is in such a shit fuck state, give it a week, they'll come up with a name for that!
GASM Command / CookieGASM
June 05, 2008, 08:25:01 PM
I'm not sure where this idea came from to turn it into a GASM.  I think it evolved after the EGGGASM and it was decided in general amongst my kids people will take anything you give them for free and if there is food, they may pay a bit more attention.

Anyway, I have found a place online which will do 300 cookies with up to 17 messages for free.  They don't require a set up charge, which in my research seems to be a big expense, as well the number of messages, 17, is better than anywhere!

So, I present the fun option of CookieGASM!!
Bring and Brag / Future MindFucker in the Making
March 28, 2008, 09:25:46 PM
Had to brag, my oldest was accepted into Gateway Institute of Technology for high school this upcoming year.  He's all excited and I'm proud of him.  He's super smart, so this will keep him challenged.

The advantage is that now both his brother and sister can also attend if they have the grades!!  The start of our agenda is soon to begin.....  BWAHAHAHA...