Messages

I'm already naked.  What do I do now?

That British dude, Robbie Williams?  Remember that video?

please enlighten me? :O

Also, Engineers do not rule the world.  Engineers function at the whim of the people who carve up the budget.

The money people.  LMNO.  You know when they're around because your money panics in a moment of existential dread.  Your stocks go sideways and they will teach you to NEVER again stick your junk in the bond market, if you know what I mean.  And I think you do.  When money people are around, all the radio stations start playing Abba, except the religious AM stations, and those just start howling about "improper physics" or maybe about how "WE GOT YOUR FRIENDS WE GOT YOUR FAMILY IA IA IA!". 

Engineers design things, given enough motivation (pain, humiliation, astonishingly small bonuses, and maybe a convention or two that they falsely assume is a chance at mating).  Engineers in their resting state do whatever they can to prevent anything from actually being built or repaired, because YOU'RE DOIN' IT WRONG YOU HORRIBLE LITTLE MAINTENANCE OBJECT.  Their radios only play David Mustaine, because they're edgy like that.

MY people, on the other hand, are terminally-lazy, half-educated people that are good with their hands if you poke them with the stun wand a time or ten.  They have a deep-seated phobia of work and react to new knowledge and techniques with spastic horror.

Everybody sucks. 

you may need to invest in some essential equipment (nipple electrical shocker thing, a few dozen whips, black nylon rope, fuzzy handcuffs, a three foot long dildo that attaches to the table or wall, and duck tape.)

after you obtain these items, you can start using them effectively, before you know it you will be promoted to CEO. I garantee it.

Still not going to do it, even if I can strip to Tiny Tim's duet with himself on I Got You Babe.

well... shit.
i guess...

there is no other option...
we have to summon Yig.

I'm already naked.  What do I do now?

run outside. yelling, "the end of the world is not cumming!"

[Canyouhea-]

Canyouhea- These buggers live inside mobile phones and will wait until you have to explain something in great detail and, right in the middle of your diatribe, will disconnect you causing you to keep going on and on unaware that you're talking to nobody. Then you must call the person back and ask THEM to find out where you left off. :argh:

:O i misread that as my name... :O

Also, OP forgot Taylor Swift.

Doktor Howl,
Is Delicate.

:O o my, i did forget the 2000s era...

Also Turn Down for What.  It's the only way you're getting LMNO's pants off, now that he's turned all serious.

RIP LMNO...

FINE LISTEN TO WHAT EVER WILL MAKE YOU STRIP! just don't listen to Cats then.

Also, OP forgot Taylor Swift.

Doktor Howl,
Is Delicate.

:O o my, i did forget the 2000s era...

the subject says it all. (i was originally going to suggest a few others (Shania Twain's Man, I feel like a Woman, Celine Dion's My Heart will Go On, ABBA's Dancing Queen (which Dancing Queen was to pay homage for the cruelness of ABBA being all mean to The Justified Ancients of MuMu) or Whoever sings, What a Girl Wants... but they wouldn't fit.))



hold on i shall look up who did that song...

O, Christina Aguilera...

*nods,

or you can pick something by Immortal.

(EDIT:  Sticky removed - dok)

[Capeditiea]

Capeditiea
Picture:  Capeditiea cannot be filmed, for technical reasons.
AKA: The Rabbi

We call Capeditiea "The Rabbi", because she keeps us right with The Law.  No, you will not exceed 299,792,458 m/s in a vacuum.  Yes, you will move forward in time.  You will leave those impossible futures and pasts that never happened alone.  That's just garbage left over from being this close to something as big as the sun.  You warp the mass, you warp the time, and there is nothing that's good for you in all that mess.  It's bad physics.  Sin.  Capeditiea's job is to strip that sin off of you, and given the sheer amount of that sin, she can hardly be blamed if she occasionally strips the real past off of someone.  Someone like you.

But she isn't going to just throw you back out into the world without a past, so she finds a past that's not too egregiously wrong/impossible, and staples it right onto you.  So that's why you're living in a reality where Donald Trump is president and Nazis are running around.  Don't get mad at her, it was the only thing left in the bin.

:O you know me so well. :O

I am the last Holy Man™ in this country.  It's my job to know these things.

you do a damn well great job at it.

i kinda want to familiarize my self with the said dildo.

 

That dildo is for HOLY™ WORK, not your depraved urges.

Really, now.  You'll just have to buy your own.

but, wouldn't you want to send it as an offering to the goddess? i am Holy™ 

i might be going back in time as well... :O

Time travel log:

<REDACTED>

<REDACTED>

<REDACTED>

<REDACTED>

<REDACTED>

<REDACTED>

I hate you guys. 

I been there like, two hours max. Vestigial fx still pending.

:O i have jumped ahead of time a month? :O

Are you in me yet?

:O i have jumped ahead of time a month? :O

i kinda want to familiarize my self with the said dildo.

 

is the tree okay?

The leaves are starting to turn yellow and fall off.

Get back on the bus and clothe thyself.

:O you killed the tree? poor tree. T.T

well, LuciferX did suggest some good advice.

just besure to wear red... and brown depending on the last time you deficated. this tree's friends may be after you. You should probably wear a bunch of weight incase they decide to throw you into a wall.

it's like I still have little bits of placental matter behind my ears from the last hit. That must be how they find me. Bbecause otherwise I duct-tape everything to my body.

:O you may need more duck tape and ducks. because they obviously love using duck tape.