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I hereby receive your ideas for discordian propaganda. Let them come, guys and gals!!
I usually will post them within a day or less.

Because LOVE is EVOL spelled backwards...

As you see I am trying to improve my photoshop skills and I am receiving requests for Discordian themed propaganda.

Hope you enjoy it! I think I got the fontswrong as I based it on a demotivator instead of a motivator (I chose delusion)

00006: ...see the picture in my sig for details

Mr Chick... Big fan of yours.

You forgot to say that the true religion is MORMONISM!!!!!!

[Aristotle]

gods of pwn get sent to a purgatory that consist of a lawn chair, a cooler with endless beers, sodas and sandwhich makins, and endless desert.

untilt hey are called back to teh material plane minus flesh by meddlesome kids.

but that's another story for anotehr day.

Hey, don't forget the strippers!

"Because a religion without zombies is like a woman without tentacles" Aristotle.

Ok, every bonafide religion speaks about what awaits the soul (a.k.a creamy filling) after we are wormfood or cremated or excreted by a burmese tiger, here are my viable options:
00001) Nothing, there is no such thing as a soul, it's just a trick to sell more t-shirts. We don't get any refund
00002) Heaven is just an illusion. A group of supernatural beings just created it in order to harvest souls to offer to the Great Cthulhu when he awakes. If you go to hell you are just being marinated for Cthulhu's dessert. It's all the same.
00003) The buddhist are right and we reincarnate, but human is the bottom of the karmic wheel, we all reincarnate as cockroaches. Oops, I stumped uncle Morrie!!!
00004) We return to the primordial chaos and Discordianism is really the true religion. Naaaaah! That's impossible!
00005) We return as zombies to feast upon the brains of the living.

What do you think?

If you post this at Synaptix's place and ask them to include it in their articles you'll probably be featured there too.

www.poee.co.uk

That's where this piece is! any idea if it will make it into a sacred text?

I'm so glad to be featured somewhere! Of course I agree under the discordian liberated rights license.
My argentine gf just dumped me and I want to celebrate!!!

The Parable of the Unwanted (Or "Billy, don´t be a hero")
As revealed to Pope C?§s?§n??v?§ Fr?§nk?´nst?´?Øn The Younger with five Umlauts plus three

All Hail Discordia!!!!!

And then Eris Discordia was walking down the street, minding her own business, on her way to her new position as frycook at the local Burger King, daydreaming about the shopping she would make with her first paycheck. Yes, it would be easier to seduce one of her legions of cultists and take his wallet, but for once she wanted to try earning money while spitting inside the buns of the undesirables, the chaos she would bring to the hapless mortals!

And then she found a young discordian weeping, sitting on the sidewalk. The goddess, who still had some minutes to spare, decided to comfort her saddened child;
"What´s wrong, child?"
"I am so depressed, I have tried to do the Goddess´bidding and convert my whole family and my workmates to the sacred ways of Discordia, and they have rejected me, they hate me so much they forgot my birthday"
"And why would you do such a thing" Eris could not hide her disgust.
"I have found the way to the truth thanks to the only Goddess and I want to share my joy, winning souls to Eris. I have spread her gospel, I have given charity in her name, I have defended my neighbor against the iniquities of the system and they keep calling me names and spitting at me"
"Ok, "by now Eris realized this poor chap had not recognized her, "Did your gorgeous and smart goddess tell you all this? Is this her will" She asked, knowing the answer was negative.
"Of course, I consulted my pineal gland as the goddess told me"
"Welll, I think you should clean between your ears"
"How would you know?" he shouted; "Discordianism is the only true religion and we are the only ones who are going to heaven, not as those heathens the Subgenii"
"Listen, you asshole, you wouldn´t know your goddess even if she bit you in the ass. Besides, No one ever said you are going to heaven, you don´t know shit"
And as the young deluded one turn his back on the goddess she proceeded to bite him in the ass. Never turn your back on a crazy woman, chum!
Then he was iluminated, and recognized Eris.
"Sorry, my lady. I am a sinner, how can I atone for my blasphemies against you?"
Eris smiled and simply said: "Become a christian and forget everything about me, I don´t want deluded retards as followers
If I wanted sheep I would eat lambchops
If I wanted evangelists I would put a classified ad in the newspaper
If I wanted servitude I would hire a guatemalan maid
If I offered salvation I would sell it for big bucks
If I wanted to spread my word I would possess the Catholic Pope and dance the watusi
If I condemned the other religions I would teach my followers to create atom bombs
If I wanted souls I would get them from garage sales, they are a buck a piece"
"Could you tell me the moral of this story, My lady"
"*sigh* Well, gimme all your worldly possessions and I will get you a ticket in heaven"
The guy immediately gave Eris his car, his house and 100,000 bucks in cash. After blessing him Eris went to the shopping mall and bought until her "shopping bone" was sore.
She never made it to her new job and the guy was devoured by Lord Cthulhu at the end of times as everybody else.

Wouldn't you think, for the sake of consistency, that "Evil Con Carne" translated into Spanish should be "Malo with Meat"?

I have stopped trying to understand the translator¬¥s logic, for example; DragonBall Z is translated as Dr?°gonb??l Zeta. "Billy and Mandy" is Las Sombr??as aventuras de Billy y Mandy (The Somber...) The Powerpuff Girls were originally "Las Chicas Coquetas"(the flirtsy girls) before going to the conventional; "Las Chicas Superpoderosas" (superpowerful...) And Ed, Edd and Edie is translated as "Unwatchable nonsense"

[Este texto ha sido esterribilizado para su comodidad]

Este texto ha sido esterribilizado para su comodidad
This text has been sterribilized for your comfort

Tan cerca de conseguir un diamante

Vinton contempl?? su chaqueta, perfectamente doblada sobre el taburete de la izquierda, vacante por el hombre del fes turquesa, y fracturado por un lado. La esponja amarilla vomita migas de pan sobre el piso de azulejo. Era el ??nico asiento vacante en todo aquel establecimiento, a las dos y media de la madrugada en ?©pocas de ajuste, ?©l estaba tan cerca como usted de conseguir  un diamante.

NOTAS

Los ojos se cerraron, Vinton se embebi?? en las sanas texturas del Howard Johnson. Percusi??n de varias capas, debajo del bajo extremo de los coches del subterr?°neo y botes enormes de metal en la parte trasera , lanzados con una honda alrededor, al alto ritmo del staccato de cuchillos, de bifurcaciones, de placas y de cristales chocando.

Completar los agujeros del jarabe rico, grave era el c?°lido ronquido de la gente que charlaba reservadamente, del embarrilamiento de los carros en el bajo Broadway , y de las sartenes de oro calientes en la parte posterior que chisporroteaban tan suavemente. Sobre todo esto Dionne Warwick cantaba suavemente en los pasos cercanos, movidos hacia atr?°s por los instrumentos de vientos de cobre amarillo y las secuencias.

La m??sica de Vinton estaba por todas partes, pero ?©l raramente se encontraba  en una posici??n donde ?©l podr??a callar su mente lo suficiente para escucharla y la dej?? volar.

Una sonrisa silenciosa se dibuj?? suavemente en sus labios mientras miraba el rojo y las formas negras que se mueven a trav?©s de los interiores de sus p?°rpados, ol??a el helado derriti?©ndose, la grasa al fre??r, y la transform??  en notas musicales con su mente.

Enjoy!!!!!!!

Hey! You´re so lucky today!!! I am mexican and I can gladly correct your style. I will bill you later, don´t worry...

What channel and time is this cartoon on..I have never seen it but you guys talk about it all the time!

CARTOON NETWORK, check your local cable listings for availability. I don¬¥t really know if it¬¥s on in USA because I watch it in Cartoon Network Latin America.  CARTOON CARTOONS will often have one short per show.

THX, It feels so fine to be amongst discordians, specially ´cause I got my rabies and tethane shots this morning.

yeah
we're glad you got your shots
we wouldn't want to get rabies

LOL.

Down here in Genhinnom, Mexico, where I live, we are having the latest season of "Billy and Mandy" as well as reruns of Evil con Carne (Malo con Carne in spanish) I am watching them at 5:00 am before I go to work.
I wonder if children watching those shows will grow up and be like us... It is a happy thought... Well, that is, if they don´t try to do like Billy and summon Yog-Sothoth.
By the way, that black demonic uncle of Billy is Nergal.

But I wanted to feed that cute purple bear with a brain-in-a-jar in its head!!!!
THX, It feels so fine to be amongst discordians, specially ´cause I got my rabies and tethane shots this morning.

The question comes as one of is characters in the Grim adventures of Billy and Mandy is no other than the Goddess herself! She speaks like a valley girl, has a killer body and sports a golden apple with a K (and is voiced by Rachel McFarlane)
Any info?