Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Or Kill Me => Topic started by: A.N. Other on March 04, 2011, 03:36:30 AM

Title: I'm No Discordian
Post by: A.N. Other on March 04, 2011, 03:36:30 AM
So, it's been awhile since I've written some total shit and had it torn apart from the community, so here it goes.

I'm No Discordian
So, you want to be a Discordian, huh?

Don't even bother. It isn't something you want to be.

Why? Well, it's simple: it's not as easy as it looks.

Look, when I first joined Discordia, I did it for all the wrong reasons. I was pissed at the Establishment. Christian jerks were damning me to Hell. People were blind sheep.

Most importantly, I wanted to be different.

Oh, that. Different. That's what drove me and, odds are, drove many to Discordia's arms. We wanted to change the world. And to do that, all we had to do was sit on our asses and wait.

Except, we forgot a detail. We became what we raged against.

Sitting on are asses, we became part of the Establishment. We damned people to the land of Thud. We were following influential Discordians, a herd of black sheep following a whacked-out shepherd.

In sum, we were just like we were before. No less different.

Face it. You're a Discordian because you wanted to seem weird. No shame in that. That was another reason I joined.

However, let's think for a second.

Did the Establishment do anything to us? Never harmed me. All the Christians I knew never once said I was going to Hell. And everyone I knew was quite out of their minds.

Were we really pissed at anything? I think we made it all up.

Sure, there's more to Discordianism than meets the eye. But that's the problem with most of us. We see the damn posters, but do we hang any of them up? We vow to make the day weirder, but by lunchtime, we've all but forgotten about this.

And then, some of us have the balls to take Discordia too seriously.

What a laugh.

There's always someone fighting about what makes a "real" Discordian, usually by people who thought it meant being totally offensive and a complete dick.

Well, I'm not going to lie. I'm no Discordian. But I'll still carry the flag.

Who knows. Maybe I'll be leading my own little herd one day.

Until then, I'll just think of other people's original thoughts.

P.S. Of course, I could also be the only idiot here without a fucking clue. That's been know to happen.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Captain Utopia on March 04, 2011, 04:49:36 AM
Discordianism reminds me to question myself.  Most other avenues of thought are self-validating.  Wanna become a super-Christian?  You can have as much Faith as the little Baby Jesus - just say you Believe.  Say it!  Lifetime guarantee.  Pay nothing now.  Low payments.  Low maintenance.  Look cool.  Feel gooood.

But being a Discordian is work.  The entry requirements are high and it takes a lot of effort to keep up.. questioning yourself regularly is painful, but necessary.  Introspection don't come cheap.  There's no comforting Faith either, just cold iron bars.

Put like that, it's hardly a choice really is it?

So why do we keep carrying the flag?  Some people can learn to un-see.  Or at least they pretend to while it drives them just a little further bit crazy as the years fly by.  I don't want to un-see though.  The truth ain't pretty, but it's the only thing worth having.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Don Coyote on March 04, 2011, 04:51:09 AM
I think I like this.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: East Coast Hustle on March 04, 2011, 04:51:39 AM
Quote from: Captain Utopia on March 04, 2011, 04:49:36 AM
So why do we keep carrying the flag?  Some people can learn to un-see.  Or at least they pretend to while it drives them just a little further bit crazy as the years fly by.  I don't want to un-see though.  The truth ain't pretty, but it's the only thing worth having.


FUCKING :potd:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Captain Utopia on March 04, 2011, 05:47:01 AM
Cheers!  In fairness, it was cobbled together from other peoples stuff I've read here, mostly Roger.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Kai on March 04, 2011, 12:56:46 PM
I take issue with the OP.

I don't hang out with discordians to seem weird, because I already AM weird. I hang out with discordians because I've found my people, equally weird as me, who won't get a hang up on my weirdness. People who actually  LIKE weird. People who I can tell all the awesome Weird about the universe and they agree that it is indeed awesome.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Phox on March 04, 2011, 01:36:59 PM
Quote from: ϗ, M.S. on March 04, 2011, 12:56:46 PM
I take issue with the OP.

I don't hang out with discordians to seem weird, because I already AM weird. I hang out with discordians because I've found my people, equally weird as me, who won't get a hang up on my weirdness. People who actually  LIKE weird. People who I can tell all the awesome Weird about the universe and they agree that it is indeed awesome.
Me too. And I do put up posters.  :fnord:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 02:23:59 PM
Quote from: Displayed Name on March 04, 2011, 03:36:30 AM

Were we really pissed at anything? I think we made it all up.

Maybe you did.  I still know why I'M mad as hell.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on March 04, 2011, 02:56:29 PM
I've got so much fucking rage in me if I could bottle it I could make nuclear molotovs.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Adios on March 04, 2011, 02:56:56 PM
I'm just here for the chicks. Discordian women are hawt.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on March 04, 2011, 03:10:08 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on March 04, 2011, 02:56:56 PM
I'm just here for the chicks. Discordian women are hawt.

Sweet talker... :wink:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Luna on March 04, 2011, 03:13:37 PM
Quote from: Charley Brown on March 04, 2011, 02:56:56 PM
I'm just here for the chicks. Discordian women are hawt.

You know it.  :wink:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:29:32 PM
I'm here because no one else will let me in  :cry:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:30:07 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:29:32 PM
I'm here because no one else will let me in  :cry:

Try wearing pance.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:34:22 PM
KILT OR GTFO  :argh!:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:41:49 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:34:22 PM
KILT OR GTFO  :argh!:

In civilized countries, we call that "cross-dressing".
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Jasper on March 04, 2011, 05:42:36 PM
Discordians don't have a canonical identity.  Most religions give their people statues, idols, trinkets, and cathedrals.  

We got play-doh.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:43:26 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on March 04, 2011, 05:42:36 PM
Discordians don't have a canonical identity.  

Tom Jones.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on March 04, 2011, 05:45:12 PM
I'm Discordian because it makes far more sense to think that this is all the fault of a Crazy Woman than any other theories I've seen thus far.

:lulz:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Jasper on March 04, 2011, 05:49:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:43:26 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on March 04, 2011, 05:42:36 PM
Discordians don't have a canonical identity. 

Tom Jones.

AUUGH NOOO  :lulz:

LADY GAGA OR GET THA FUCK OUT
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:50:26 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on March 04, 2011, 05:49:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:43:26 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on March 04, 2011, 05:42:36 PM
Discordians don't have a canonical identity. 

Tom Jones.

AUUGH NOOO  :lulz:

LADY GAGA OR GET THA FUCK OUT

I gotta ask you, Siggie...

...Have you ever seen them together?

I think not.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Jasper on March 04, 2011, 05:51:51 PM
Oh.


I have the weirdest boner right now.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 05:53:46 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on March 04, 2011, 05:51:51 PM
Oh.


I have the weirdest boner right now.

The Good Reverend Roger:  Sick, but not as sick as you fuckos.

:lulz:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: LMNO on March 04, 2011, 06:56:05 PM
Quote from: Sigmatic on March 04, 2011, 05:51:51 PM
I have the weirdest boner right now.

Newsfeed.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Jasper on March 04, 2011, 06:59:02 PM
YES!  :D
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Luna on March 04, 2011, 07:27:41 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:34:22 PM
KILT OR GTFO  :argh!:

I'm with P3nt on this one.  Kilts are dead sexy, on the right men. (And if they're not sexy enough for a kilt...  Meh.)
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Phox on March 04, 2011, 09:03:50 PM
Quote from: Luna on March 04, 2011, 07:27:41 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:34:22 PM
KILT OR GTFO  :argh!:

I'm with P3nt on this one.  Kilts are dead sexy, on the right men. (And if they're not sexy enough for a kilt...  Meh.)
Kilts are almost as hawt as ME.  :D
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Don Coyote on March 04, 2011, 09:04:26 PM
I am buying a kilt because of this thread.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on March 04, 2011, 09:05:00 PM
Quote from: Luna on March 04, 2011, 07:27:41 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:34:22 PM
KILT OR GTFO  :argh!:

I'm with P3nt on this one.  Kilts are dead sexy, on the right men. (And if they're not sexy enough for a kilt...  Meh.)

You're SCA Biased ;-)
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Luna on March 04, 2011, 09:06:55 PM
Quote from: Ratatosk on March 04, 2011, 09:05:00 PM
Quote from: Luna on March 04, 2011, 07:27:41 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on March 04, 2011, 05:34:22 PM
KILT OR GTFO  :argh!:

I'm with P3nt on this one.  Kilts are dead sexy, on the right men. (And if they're not sexy enough for a kilt...  Meh.)

You're SCA Biased ;-)

You bet your ass I am, and I'm glad of it.


Quote from: Canis latrans eques on March 04, 2011, 09:04:26 PM
I am buying a kilt because of this thread.

Pics.  And let me know if you need a source.   :wink:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on March 04, 2011, 09:07:38 PM
I am no gamer or anything like that and I, for one, realize it isn't the kilt that is sexy, it's those legs underneath that go all the way up and make an ass out of themselves that are my main attraction....

I'm just as good with a towel, shower curtain, sheet, posterboard.....

:fap:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 09:25:33 PM
Allow me to remind you all that there is no way to keep rabid weasels/ferrets in a kilt without restraining them, ergo kilts are automatically inferior to pance.
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Dysfunctional Cunt on March 04, 2011, 09:35:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 09:25:33 PM
Allow me to remind you all that there is no way to keep rabid weasels/ferrets in a kilt without restraining them, ergo kilts are automatically inferior to pance.

Yes but honey with what I'm going to be doing to with him he's not going to want anything more rabid than me in the room  :wink:

Otherwise for regular wear, I agree 1000000%
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Don Coyote on March 04, 2011, 09:37:29 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 09:25:33 PM
Allow me to remind you all that there is no way to keep rabid weasels/ferrets in a kilt without restraining them, ergo kilts are automatically inferior to pance.
:spittake: :spit:
Title: Re: I'm No Discordian
Post by: Luna on March 04, 2011, 09:42:13 PM
Quote from: Khara on March 04, 2011, 09:35:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 04, 2011, 09:25:33 PM
Allow me to remind you all that there is no way to keep rabid weasels/ferrets in a kilt without restraining them, ergo kilts are automatically inferior to pance.

Yes but honey with what I'm going to be doing with to him he's not going to want anything more rabid than me in the room  :wink:

Otherwise for regular wear, I agree 1000000%

Fixed that for ya.