How many fucking regulatory bodies need to respond to a loss of containment? ALL OF THEM. Because they DON'T TALK TO EACH OTHER. I have been inspected on the same thing 6 TIMES NOW. Creepy part: All 6 inspectors looked like carbon copies of each other, with minor variations in hair color. Other than that, they all had the same pop-bottle glasses, the same scraggly mustache, the same EXACT clothes, etc.
It's like I'm in some dystopian novel, being attacked by clones bearing Blackberries.
Where the fuck do these people come from? They're not zombies, yet they seem lifeless. They all talk like they're stoned. I knew civil service was bad, but I wasn't prepared for THIS. Even the people in the IRS can smile, for fuck's sake, even if it's only when they see bad car accidents.
We can only hope that they don't breed true without the assistance of some sort of evil science. In some ways, they're worse than the 500 pound WalMart People™, even though not one of them has a spare ounce on them.
Note: I have 4 more inspections this week.
Words cannot express how much I hate humanity right now. You should all SHUT UP and GET OFF OF MY PLANET.
Or kill me.
Fuck.
You should start snapping pictures of them and do that what would your baby look like website thing and show it to the third guy who comes in. Or ask them if they ever watched the x files and if theyre part of that hybrid project.
I will gladly relocate off this planet, sir, when you have finished responding to the Q2 regulatory audit. In quadruplicate.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 04, 2012, 06:28:14 PM
I will gladly relocate off this planet, sir, when you have finished responding to the Q2 regulatory audit. In quadruplicate.
:walken:
Quote from: Twiddlegeddon on June 04, 2012, 06:26:59 PM
You should start snapping pictures of them and do that what would your baby look like website thing and show it to the third guy who comes in. Or ask them if they ever watched the x files and if theyre part of that hybrid project.
LESSON #1: WE DO NOT SASS EPA INSPECTORS.
Not because you'd get fired, but because they can put you in prison very easily.
And you know the first item on their check sheet is: "Does respondee look like someone who gave me a wedgie/swirley combo in high school?"
TGRR's description sounds kind of like hipsters. Somebody granted power to hipsterz. :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 04, 2012, 06:33:18 PM
And you know the first item on their check sheet is: "Does respondee look like someone who gave me a wedgie/swirley combo in high school?"
Actually, I don't think they even have that much emotion.
When they talk to each other, it's almost like "1011000111001100001110". They are machine people.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on June 04, 2012, 06:34:49 PM
TGRR's description sounds kind of like hipsters. Somebody granted power to hipsterz. :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
Nooo, they look like Napoleon Dynamite's brother, Kip.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on June 04, 2012, 06:34:49 PM
TGRR's description sounds kind of like hipsters. Somebody granted power to hipsterz. :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
No, more like bloodless nerds. Like nerds with antifreeze in their veins. Cool and calculating, and unsympathetic to mankind. As some guy once said.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 04, 2012, 06:35:58 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on June 04, 2012, 06:34:49 PM
TGRR's description sounds kind of like hipsters. Somebody granted power to hipsterz. :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
Nooo, they look like Napoleon Dynamite's brother, Kip.
Just google imaged.
SPOT FUCKING ON.
OH MY FUCKING GOD.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 04, 2012, 06:37:23 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 04, 2012, 06:35:58 PM
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on June 04, 2012, 06:34:49 PM
TGRR's description sounds kind of like hipsters. Somebody granted power to hipsterz. :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
Nooo, they look like Napoleon Dynamite's brother, Kip.
Just google imaged.
SPOT FUCKING ON.
OH MY FUCKING GOD.
(http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile-ak-snc4/41592_67489294368_2874167_n.jpg)
:horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
This just in: Head of the sovereign state of Canada says, "We don't need no environmental scientists on payroll, eh? We'll just hire the EPA from the good ole' USA. (http://www.canada.com/technology/Feds+suggest+could+replace+Canadian+pollution+team/6722912/story.html)"
You have got to be kidding me.
:horrormirth:
Also, I have a theory about environmental scientists who go to work for the EPA. Environmental scientists, like people in public health and sociology, start out all idealistic and optimistic about changing the world for the better, and fixing things. In school, they learn that everything is fucked and the government is heinously corrupt, so the good ones, in possession of this knowledge, choose to work for local and State agencies or slightly less-evil corporations. This leaves the environmental science equivalent of George Zimmerman, who brainwash themselves into believing that the EPA is not one of the three most corrupt government agencies in the USA and that they are Saving The World by riding herd on overworked maintenance managers.
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on June 05, 2012, 10:14:30 PM
Also, I have a theory about environmental scientists who go to work for the EPA. Environmental scientists, like people in public health and sociology, start out all idealistic and optimistic about changing the world for the better, and fixing things. In school, they learn that everything is fucked and the government is heinously corrupt, so the good ones, in possession of this knowledge, choose to work for local and State agencies or slightly less-evil corporations. This leaves the environmental science equivalent of George Zimmerman, who brainwash themselves into believing that the EPA is not one of the three most corrupt government agencies in the USA and that they are Saving The World by riding herd on overworked maintenance managers.
this.
Granted i'm just an under grad, but I've seen the opinions of several acquaintances change over the semesters in a very similar pattern. Especially the pot smokers and weekend protestors
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 04, 2012, 06:35:25 PM
When they talk to each other, it's almost like "1011000111001100001110". They are machine people.
Should I read this and get a mental image of their mouths opening abnormally wide while they screech to each other like 56k modems?
Quote from: Signor Paesior on June 06, 2012, 01:06:15 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 04, 2012, 06:35:25 PM
When they talk to each other, it's almost like "1011000111001100001110". They are machine people.
Should I read this and get a mental image of their mouths opening abnormally wide while they screech to each other like 56k modems?
Just like shrieky girls.
:lulz: :lulz:
obviously this is what you need (click for PDF):
(http://www.spagbook.com/images/sign-in.png) (http://www.spagbook.com/images/sign-in.pdf)
:lulz: That was awesome.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 04, 2012, 05:52:04 PM
How many fucking regulatory bodies need to respond to a loss of containment? ALL OF THEM. Because they DON'T TALK TO EACH OTHER. I have been inspected on the same thing 6 TIMES NOW. Creepy part: All 6 inspectors looked like carbon copies of each other, with minor variations in hair color. Other than that, they all had the same pop-bottle glasses, the same scraggly mustache, the same EXACT clothes, etc.
It's like I'm in some dystopian novel, being attacked by clones bearing Blackberries.
Where the fuck do these people come from? They're not zombies, yet they seem lifeless. They all talk like they're stoned. I knew civil service was bad, but I wasn't prepared for THIS. Even the people in the IRS can smile, for fuck's sake, even if it's only when they see bad car accidents.
We can only hope that they don't breed true without the assistance of some sort of evil science. In some ways, they're worse than the 500 pound WalMart People™, even though not one of them has a spare ounce on them.
Note: I have 4 more inspections this week.
Words cannot express how much I hate humanity right now. You should all SHUT UP and GET OFF OF MY PLANET.
Or kill me.
Could it be that each of the regulatory bodies are actually a front for the same handful of civil servants and it WAS the same guy every time, collecting six different paychecks under six assumed names, and that he takes you for a fool by only changing his hair colour when he meets you?