go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
No.
Can't complain other than during the work week we are both too tired to do much.
This is a strange request.
My sex life is only interesting for Villager and I.
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 21, 2014, 05:27:14 PM
This is a strange request.
Well, some people have the urge to talk about their sex life.
I know, i sometimes still feel that urge.
It is better that they get it out of their system here than that they spag up other threads.
Rong, thanks for the community service!
Quote from: Regret on June 21, 2014, 06:03:37 PM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 21, 2014, 05:27:14 PM
This is a strange request.
Well, some people have the urge to talk about their sex life.
I know, i sometimes still feel that urge.
It is better that they get it out of their system here than that they spag up other threads.
Rong, thanks for the community service!
Regret makes a very valid point.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 21, 2014, 06:06:31 PM
Quote from: Regret on June 21, 2014, 06:03:37 PM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 21, 2014, 05:27:14 PM
This is a strange request.
Well, some people have the urge to talk about their sex life.
I know, i sometimes still feel that urge.
It is better that they get it out of their system here than that they spag up other threads.
Rong, thanks for the community service!
Regret makes a very valid point.
Thanks, we can even refer people here when they accidentally shoot their load in a socially akward place.
I wouldn't go so far as recommending stickying it though, there are quite enough stickied threads. Besides, we don't have a lot of good real example/responses yet.
My sex life is limited, i had sex about 2 months ago, it was over before i came so the stereotypes were reversed since i am male and my then-partner is female.
An interesting experience now that i think about it.
Anyway, that was not my point, this is my point: SO MUCH FAPPING. Seriously, it'd be scary if it wasn't so relaxing. I need to improve my technique though, less emphasis on getting the job done and more emphasis on enjoying the experience.
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
For that I appoint you Chief Social Engineer.
Sir, have you detected any other issues we should try to Social Engineer away?
Your crew awaits your orders. (May I join your crew?)
May I propose a motto for (y)our department?
"Eternal Vigilance against Patterns of Undesirable Behaviour!"
(http://assets.diylol.com/hfs/41f/c20/ed2/resized/fry-can-t-tell-meme-generator-can-t-tell-if-sarcasm-or-serious-1a9500.jpg)
Basically like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8E_zMLCRNg&feature=youtube_gdata_player
I have come to the point where the following has become clear:
Getting the sex I actually want is unlikely, and I am unwilling to just bang meat.
Almost everyone I have banged in the past has come out worse for it, for one reason or another.
People I have never banged seem to enjoy my company over a longer duration of time.
Basically, I am just trying to slow down my sex drive, which has gone sky high recently.
All the inter-racial porns I can eat.
Wait, I meant to say:
I AM A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.
Oh, i dont know, ive lived under a rock for so long focusing on school and work that i havent seriously dated no one or gotten laid in like 5 years =/
Quote from: Faust on June 21, 2014, 04:25:39 PM
......... during the work week we are both too tired to do much.
Quote from: The Johnny on June 21, 2014, 11:10:54 PM
.... i dont know, .... lived under a rock for so long focusing on [studying] and work .....
Quote from: Alty on June 21, 2014, 09:09:19 PM
...................
I am just trying to slow down my sex drive, .......................
Everything that could be said
has been said, and could only add: "I enjoy the company of those I'm not in cahoots with for a longer duration of time."
haha
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 07:40:58 PM
(http://assets.diylol.com/hfs/41f/c20/ed2/resized/fry-can-t-tell-meme-generator-can-t-tell-if-sarcasm-or-serious-1a9500.jpg)
Jokingly serious, as opposed to seriously joking.
I actually think using our collective knowledge about human behavioural patterns to increase our enjoyment of this forum is a good thing.
AKA Social Engineering, for some reason people think that is a bad idea, especially those who have studied social engineering.
1I volunteered you for the position because I think you would be good at it.
1 This may be because the focus of such studies lies on the history of Social Engineering and that history is quite bloody. If you want to learn actual social engineering skills, go study marketing.
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:45:22 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
I hate to do this to you, but you have to set the right example.
This thread needs more examples of being used in the right way.
I'm afraid you will have to make a sacrifice before the altar of Social Engineering.
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:50:40 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:45:22 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
I hate to do this to you, but you have to set the right example.
This thread needs more examples of being used in the right way.
I'm afraid you will have to make a sacrifice before the altar of Social Engineering.
But you know it always ends the same way, and then I run the dildos through the dishwasher.
They are dishwasher safe? Oo
TRRN seems to be a Phenomenal Anomaly.
I see it is more of a pressure valve... if we didnt have the Great RWHN Drug Wars of 2009-2013 there might had been a great number of derailed threads that would still happen to this very day.
I'm still not clear who RWHN was here... One of my favorite novels' main character had a similar name, and so I was thrown off by it initially.
I'm not even going to ask about the drug wars had here.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:53:12 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:50:40 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:45:22 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
I hate to do this to you, but you have to set the right example.
This thread needs more examples of being used in the right way.
I'm afraid you will have to make a sacrifice before the altar of Social Engineering.
But you know it always ends the same way, and then I run the dildos through the dishwasher.
Look, this is a free for all thread. Just go for it.
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 01:33:58 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:53:12 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:50:40 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:45:22 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
I hate to do this to you, but you have to set the right example.
This thread needs more examples of being used in the right way.
I'm afraid you will have to make a sacrifice before the altar of Social Engineering.
But you know it always ends the same way, and then I run the dildos through the dishwasher.
Look, this is a free for all thread. Just go for it.
My boyfriend is on his way over here right now with surgical gloves and beets. Looks like I need to put the red sheets on the bed tonight.
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have
needs.
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 07:40:58 PM
(http://assets.diylol.com/hfs/41f/c20/ed2/resized/fry-can-t-tell-meme-generator-can-t-tell-if-sarcasm-or-serious-1a9500.jpg)
Eh. Fu kit. :lulz:
If the damned AC wasn't always blasting frigid frost into an already chilly climate, sex could get hot and sweaty instead of "Hurry the hell up, it hurts!" Blaahhh.... boring? Haha That's not the word I would use.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 03:15:48 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 01:33:58 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:53:12 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:50:40 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:45:22 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
I hate to do this to you, but you have to set the right example.
This thread needs more examples of being used in the right way.
I'm afraid you will have to make a sacrifice before the altar of Social Engineering.
But you know it always ends the same way, and then I run the dildos through the dishwasher.
Look, this is a free for all thread. Just go for it.
My boyfriend is on his way over here right now with surgical gloves and beets. Looks like I need to put the red sheets on the bed tonight.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz: Ofuk. You glorious bastards are going to start a one-up battle aren't you... Though I don't know how Nigel can top a vestigial twin swapping body modification kink.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 05:14:01 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 03:15:48 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 01:33:58 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:53:12 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:50:40 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:45:22 AM
Quote from: Regret on June 22, 2014, 12:35:17 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 22, 2014, 12:34:31 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 06:35:04 PM
I kinda chuckled at the idea of this being a 'sticky' thread. But, yeah, I saw a comment about someone's inability to refrain from spagging up other threads with comments about their sex life and thought maybe if there was a thread devoted to just that, it may help.
:lulz: @ sticky.
The idea is growing on me, we kinda have to now :lulz:
If people actually start using it to talk about their grotty details, I will too. And nobody wants that, trust me.
I hate to do this to you, but you have to set the right example.
This thread needs more examples of being used in the right way.
I'm afraid you will have to make a sacrifice before the altar of Social Engineering.
But you know it always ends the same way, and then I run the dildos through the dishwasher.
Look, this is a free for all thread. Just go for it.
My boyfriend is on his way over here right now with surgical gloves and beets. Looks like I need to put the red sheets on the bed tonight.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz: Ofuk. You glorious bastards are going to start a one-up battle aren't you... Though I don't know how Nigel can top a vestigial twin swapping body modification kink.
Same way I'd top anyone else. Jenn and Chaz might have something to say about that, though.
Ain't dated anybody or gotten laid since December 2013 and nothing about my current situation is conducive to meeting people. I don't exactly have a sweet bachelor pad to bring ladies back to either. :lol:
"Hey good lookin', wanna get comfortable in a cramped, cluttered space that feels pretty much exactly like a student's cheap-ass living arrangements?"
Yeah, it's not looking great for me right now on that front.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 22, 2014, 10:40:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Something I really didn't get until I was in my mid-late 30's; most people's sex lives are only interesting to themselves. And sometimes to medical anthropologists, as in the case of Roger.
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
:lulz: Like some kind of weird meta-eroticism.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:01:03 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 22, 2014, 10:40:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Something I really didn't get until I was in my mid-late 30's; most people's sex lives are only interesting to themselves. And sometimes to medical anthropologists, as in the case of Roger.
If I'm to be quite honest, my sex is vanilla, and that's fine with me. It's usually (but not always) missionary, it usually involves one partner, but not both, getting oral (because either way we're both getting equally warmed up), and once the main event happens, we both finish withing 5 to 10 minutes. Mutually satisfying, but not very interesting to the objective observer. It's certainly not porn worthy.
Actually last night was awesome. I was half asleep, started transitioning from a dream into real life, of course that gradually woke her up and got her in the mood... it was all fondling, so we kinda both half-asleeped the foreplay and were totally awake by the time we got to the main event. Then we both fell back asleep. Interesting to anyone else? Probably not.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
It's like SGitR. KGitR.
SIGNORA SAYS TO ME, SHE SAYS "EY, FUCKPIG. HOW YOU WANT TO GET NAILED?"
ME, OF COURSE, I COME RUNNING IN, WIDE WIDE GRIN.
BAM. NAIL STRAIGHT THROUGH FOOT. CAR KEYS STOLEN FROM POCKET.
NO MIGUELS COME TO MY AID EVEN AS I SHOUT "MIGUEL".
OUT OF MIGUELS AGAIN. PERHAPS SHE HAS GONE TO GET MORE?
Quote from: Pæs on June 23, 2014, 12:48:45 AM
SIGNORA SAYS TO ME, SHE SAYS "EY, FUCKPIG. HOW YOU WANT TO GET NAILED?"
ME, OF COURSE, I COME RUNNING IN, WIDE WIDE GRIN.
BAM. NAIL STRAIGHT THROUGH FOOT. CAR KEYS STOLEN FROM POCKET.
NO MIGUELS COME TO MY AID EVEN AS I SHOUT "MIGUEL".
OUT OF MIGUELS AGAIN. PERHAPS SHE HAS GONE TO GET MORE?
And they say romance is dead. :lulz:
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:01:03 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 22, 2014, 10:40:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Something I really didn't get until I was in my mid-late 30's; most people's sex lives are only interesting to themselves. And sometimes to medical anthropologists, as in the case of Roger.
They're always JUDGING me. "That's not how you use a tack hammer", they say, "You can't actually make your leg DO that".
Well, it's MY monkey, and I'll GET IT ON however I please.
Quote from: Pæs on June 23, 2014, 12:48:45 AM
SIGNORA SAYS TO ME, SHE SAYS "EY, FUCKPIG. HOW YOU WANT TO GET NAILED?"
ME, OF COURSE, I COME RUNNING IN, WIDE WIDE GRIN.
BAM. NAIL STRAIGHT THROUGH FOOT. CAR KEYS STOLEN FROM POCKET.
NO MIGUELS COME TO MY AID EVEN AS I SHOUT "MIGUEL".
OUT OF MIGUELS AGAIN. PERHAPS SHE HAS GONE TO GET MORE?
:lulz:
Quote from: Cainad (dec.) on June 23, 2014, 12:41:49 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
:lulz: Like some kind of weird meta-eroticism.
Yeah, exactly... I wonder if it's not that their kink itself turns them on as much as thinking about how kinky they're being makes them feel sexy. Same effect in the long run, but so much more annoying for those of us who are unwitting (and unwilling) participants in their kink, via being constantly informed/reminded of it.
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 23, 2014, 12:47:54 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
It's like SGitR. KGitR.
:lulz:
Quote from: Pæs on June 23, 2014, 12:48:45 AM
SIGNORA SAYS TO ME, SHE SAYS "EY, FUCKPIG. HOW YOU WANT TO GET NAILED?"
ME, OF COURSE, I COME RUNNING IN, WIDE WIDE GRIN.
BAM. NAIL STRAIGHT THROUGH FOOT. CAR KEYS STOLEN FROM POCKET.
NO MIGUELS COME TO MY AID EVEN AS I SHOUT "MIGUEL".
OUT OF MIGUELS AGAIN. PERHAPS SHE HAS GONE TO GET MORE?
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:18:52 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:01:03 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 22, 2014, 10:40:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Something I really didn't get until I was in my mid-late 30's; most people's sex lives are only interesting to themselves. And sometimes to medical anthropologists, as in the case of Roger.
They're always JUDGING me. "That's not how you use a tack hammer", they say, "You can't actually make your leg DO that".
Well, it's MY monkey, and I'll GET IT ON however I please.
This is why they study you, Roger. Science needs to know. Before it's TOO LATE.
Again.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 01:28:53 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:18:52 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:01:03 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 22, 2014, 10:40:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Something I really didn't get until I was in my mid-late 30's; most people's sex lives are only interesting to themselves. And sometimes to medical anthropologists, as in the case of Roger.
They're always JUDGING me. "That's not how you use a tack hammer", they say, "You can't actually make your leg DO that".
Well, it's MY monkey, and I'll GET IT ON however I please.
This is why they study you, Roger. Science needs to know. Before it's TOO LATE.
Again.
Why? It always ENDS the same way..."<insert horrible shit>, and then she smacked my bitch up. Again."
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:31:25 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 01:28:53 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:18:52 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:01:03 AM
Quote from: Ållnephew Tvýðleþøn on June 22, 2014, 10:40:23 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 22, 2014, 05:57:25 AM
Quote from: rong on June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM
go ahead. if you want to.
since i got divorced my sex life has been fucking great.
Well, things have gotten better since I had that horrible vestigial twin removed from Jenn's back, and surgically attached to my nads. This brings up some weird potential incest issues on her part, but that's a risk I'm willing to take. I'm not just one of your fried chicken tramps, you know. I have needs.
:lulz:
This sort of thing is precisely why my sex life is only interesting to Villager and myself. How can we top that?
Something I really didn't get until I was in my mid-late 30's; most people's sex lives are only interesting to themselves. And sometimes to medical anthropologists, as in the case of Roger.
They're always JUDGING me. "That's not how you use a tack hammer", they say, "You can't actually make your leg DO that".
Well, it's MY monkey, and I'll GET IT ON however I please.
This is why they study you, Roger. Science needs to know. Before it's TOO LATE.
Again.
Why? It always ENDS the same way..."<insert horrible shit>, and then she smacked my bitch up. Again."
But the cheese fire, though, and the thing with the egg, and also that one machine with the mayonnaise and the dog running off with the dildo... these need to be properly recorded. For posterity.
Especially because setting the kitchen on fire as a prelude to receiving a beating is a fairly unusual form of foreplay.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 01:35:48 AM
Especially because setting the kitchen on fire as a prelude to receiving a beating is a fairly unusual form of foreplay.
I dunno. It's not THAT unusual.
And then there was this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SwlqFc8RHA
You may recall.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:37:21 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 01:35:48 AM
Especially because setting the kitchen on fire as a prelude to receiving a beating is a fairly unusual form of foreplay.
I dunno. It's not THAT unusual.
And then there was this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SwlqFc8RHA
You may recall.
Oh, that gets the ladies going every time. I confess I'm not immune. :fap:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:37:21 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 01:35:48 AM
Especially because setting the kitchen on fire as a prelude to receiving a beating is a fairly unusual form of foreplay.
I dunno. It's not THAT unusual.
And then there was this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SwlqFc8RHA
You may recall.
FUCK YEAH
that got my jimmies ALL KINDS of rustled
I recall that I couldn't turn my head for like a fucking week. :lulz:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:53:23 AM
I recall that I couldn't turn my head for like a fucking week. :lulz:
:lulz:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 01:53:23 AM
I recall that I couldn't turn my head for like a fucking week. :lulz:
:lulz:
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Yes. Very hard to find kinky people in Portland. For instance, sometimes you have to take such extreme measures as walking down the street or going to the grocery store. At least 1 in every 30 Portlander is straight vanilla. It's like trying to find hay in a haystack...which happens to have a needle somewhere in it.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 01:25:38 AM
Quote from: Cainad (dec.) on June 23, 2014, 12:41:49 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Remind her that she should get explicit consent before ear-fucking you...then send her to a munch.
:lulz: Like some kind of weird meta-eroticism.
Yeah, exactly... I wonder if it's not that their kink itself turns them on as much as thinking about how kinky they're being makes them feel sexy. Same effect in the long run, but so much more annoying for those of us who are unwitting (and unwilling) participants in their kink, via being constantly informed/reminded of it.
Maybe remind her that ear-fucking requires consent...then send her to a munch.
Quote from: NoLeDeMiel on June 23, 2014, 03:37:58 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Yes. Very hard to find kinky people in Portland. For instance, sometimes you have to take such extreme measures as walking down the street or going to the grocery store. At least 1 in every 30 Portlander is straight vanilla. It's like trying to find hay in a haystack...which happens to have a needle somewhere in it.
Seriously. The people I feel sorry for are the ones looking for a non-kinky partner, because those are like fucking unicorns.
I am vanilla as hell. I just believe in putting my back into it.
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 03:50:45 PM
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.
This is because you are tiny.
Tiny tiny tiny.
The Good Reverend Hamish,
Prefers women that can whoop his ass.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:49:17 PM
I am vanilla as hell. I just believe in putting my back into it.
Yeah, I really don't consider myself kinky at all, but it occurs to me that this is possibly for the same reason that Bondage Girl identifies as kinky, which is that I don't get a charge out of the label at all, and she does.
Oh, and in addition I HATE all the lingo that people use around polyamory and kink. It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
The word play adds a sort of immature quality to it. It's an odd bit of jargon.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Jesus, she sounds insufferable. Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Jesus, she sounds insufferable. Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.
Yep, you're both on the money. It's the taboo aspect that makes certain kinds of people turn into attention whores.
But when you actually run towards these people with the ball gag and crack pipe, well, it's never turned into a fun time.
It may be my approach.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:54:14 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 03:50:45 PM
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.
This is because you are tiny.
Tiny tiny tiny.
The Good Reverend Hamish,
Prefers women that can whoop his ass.
I only look tiny because half of me is in hammer space.
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 06:00:26 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:54:14 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 03:50:45 PM
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.
This is because you are tiny.
Tiny tiny tiny.
The Good Reverend Hamish,
Prefers women that can whoop his ass.
I only look tiny because half of me is in hammer space.
Point. Extra-dimensional Jimmy Walnuts. The mind gibbers in terror.
Quote from: Raz Tech on June 23, 2014, 06:25:18 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.
:lulz:
Quote from: Raz Tech on June 23, 2014, 06:25:18 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.
wtf :lol:
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Jesus, she sounds insufferable. Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.
YES YES THIS
It's the pretentious babblings of a sheltered trust-fund kid who is finally, FINALLY doing something her parents would probably disapprove of.
Quote from: Raz Tech on June 23, 2014, 06:25:18 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.
:lulz: :eek:
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 24, 2014, 12:05:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Jesus, she sounds insufferable. Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.
YES YES THIS
It's the pretentious babblings of a sheltered trust-fund kid who is finally, FINALLY doing something her parents would probably disapprove of.
Assuming they don't actually do it themselves.
You should mention that possibility to her. It could be her interest is genetically inherited (http://www.scribd.com/doc/26957524/BDSM-Psychobiology).
Quote from: Cain on June 24, 2014, 12:11:33 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 24, 2014, 12:05:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Jesus, she sounds insufferable. Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.
YES YES THIS
It's the pretentious babblings of a sheltered trust-fund kid who is finally, FINALLY doing something her parents would probably disapprove of.
Assuming they don't actually do it themselves.
You should mention that possibility to her. It could be her interest is genetically inherited (http://www.scribd.com/doc/26957524/BDSM-Psychobiology).
:lulz: She would be horrified. And it's not unlikely, as her parents are liberal academics... hardly the type to be uptight.
Quote from: Cain on June 24, 2014, 12:11:33 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 24, 2014, 12:05:20 AM
Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?
She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.
I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.
Jesus, she sounds insufferable. Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.
YES YES THIS
It's the pretentious babblings of a sheltered trust-fund kid who is finally, FINALLY doing something her parents would probably disapprove of.
Assuming they don't actually do it themselves.
You should mention that possibility to her. It could be her interest is genetically inherited (http://www.scribd.com/doc/26957524/BDSM-Psychobiology).
Any idea where the rest of that pdf is?
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:49:17 PM
I am vanilla as hell. I just believe in putting my back into it.
Yeah, I really don't consider myself kinky at all, but it occurs to me that this is possibly for the same reason that Bondage Girl identifies as kinky, which is that I don't get a charge out of the label at all, and she does.
Oh, and in addition I HATE all the lingo that people use around polyamory and kink. It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
Sex is the furious smashing of genitals together in new and hilarious ways. Why fancy that up? It's already perfect.
It was all, tremendously interesting :lulz:
My sex life?
I'm a virgin.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on June 24, 2014, 03:36:41 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:49:17 PM
I am vanilla as hell. I just believe in putting my back into it.
Yeah, I really don't consider myself kinky at all, but it occurs to me that this is possibly for the same reason that Bondage Girl identifies as kinky, which is that I don't get a charge out of the label at all, and she does.
Oh, and in addition I HATE all the lingo that people use around polyamory and kink. It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
Sex is the furious smashing of genitals together in new and hilarious ways. Why fancy that up? It's already perfect.
:lulz:
After thinking about it a bit, I think there is a good argument for labeling some sexy things as "play." Pretending to be furniture is a game. Duct taping someone to a pole and ignoring them for three hours is a game. Putting on a leather pony costume and pulling a cart is a game. None of that is sex, or fucking, and sometimes it's not even a prelude to sex, but they're things people do to get their jollies. Yes, calling it "play" could be seen as immature, but who gives a fuck if people want to be immature about their genital bashing as long as consenting adults consent?
I don't sex. It's filthy.
Absolutely unsanitary.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 25, 2014, 04:18:26 PM
After thinking about it a bit, I think there is a good argument for labeling some sexy things as "play." Pretending to be furniture is a game. Duct taping someone to a pole and ignoring them for three hours is a game. Putting on a leather pony costume and pulling a cart is a game. None of that is sex, or fucking, and sometimes it's not even a prelude to sex, but they're things people do to get their jollies. Yes, calling it "play" could be seen as immature, but who gives a fuck if people want to be immature about their genital bashing as long as consenting adults consent?
I don't give a fuck what they call it among themselves. I get the fucking heebie-jeebies when they refer to sex as "play" or "playdates" when they're talking to me. I'm not five.
And kink might not be fucking, but it's sure as hell sex.
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 25, 2014, 04:28:09 PM
I don't sex. It's filthy.
GOOD. SEND ME YOUR NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 26, 2014, 02:01:53 AM
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 25, 2014, 04:28:09 PM
I don't sex. It's filthy.
GOOD. SEND ME YOUR NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
THERE'S STILL OTHER THINGS TO DO WITH THE NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 26, 2014, 11:59:53 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 26, 2014, 02:01:53 AM
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 25, 2014, 04:28:09 PM
I don't sex. It's filthy.
GOOD. SEND ME YOUR NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
AND MENS, WHILE YOU'RE AT IT.
AND MENS.
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 26, 2014, 03:57:41 PM
THERE'S STILL OTHER THINGS TO DO WITH THE NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
Yes, but you can do THOSE things with French people. Send ze women over! SCHNELL!
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:49:17 PM
I am vanilla as hell. I just believe in putting my back into it.
Yeah, I really don't consider myself kinky at all, but it occurs to me that this is possibly for the same reason that Bondage Girl identifies as kinky, which is that I don't get a charge out of the label at all, and she does.
Oh, and in addition I HATE all the lingo that people use around polyamory and kink. It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
<3 I LOVE YOU
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 26, 2014, 04:06:19 PM
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 26, 2014, 03:57:41 PM
THERE'S STILL OTHER THINGS TO DO WITH THE NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
Yes, but you can do THOSE things with French people. Send ze women over! SCHNELL!
NUH UH! THE FRENCH SMELL OF OLD WINE AND FOIE GRAS.
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 29, 2014, 12:27:04 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 26, 2014, 04:06:19 PM
Quote from: Allfader Waffles on June 26, 2014, 03:57:41 PM
THERE'S STILL OTHER THINGS TO DO WITH THE NORWEGIAN WOMENS.
Yes, but you can do THOSE things with French people. Send ze women over! SCHNELL!
NUH UH! THE FRENCH SMELL OF OLD WINE AND FOIE GRAS.
It has to be a step up from the normal Rakfisk stink.
With respect to the OP, I've been a lot more grabby around the wife for the last 2 weeks than I have been since we were first married. Possibly more.
Digging this shit.
Not my sex life, but
Met a reallllly cute bartender last night
flirted.
Awyeah!
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 02, 2014, 05:31:50 PM
Not my sex life, but
Met a reallllly cute bartender last night
flirted.
Awyeah!
:banana:
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on July 02, 2014, 05:43:24 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 02, 2014, 05:31:50 PM
Not my sex life, but
Met a reallllly cute bartender last night
flirted.
Awyeah!
:banana:
Yeah, old people thrills, man. He's like six years younger than me and taken, but WHEEEEEE!!!
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
No, but that's hilarious and adorable. :lulz:
Totally natural and more healthy than posturing otherwise.
In the early stages of my sex life I was too busy being ridden with anxiety about my performance to realize how hilarious sex is. I didn't start giggling over the absurdity of it until much, much later.
The past fling I remember most fondly is the guy who taught me that laughing during sex can be a lot of fun.
However, I also learned with him that a case of the giggles on a steep roof is not always a good thing. Also, shingles suck.
Quote from: Luna on July 02, 2014, 11:32:26 PM
The past fling I remember most fondly is the guy who taught me that laughing during sex can be a lot of fun.
However, I also learned with him that a case of the giggles on a steep roof is not always a good thing. Also, shingles suck.
Whoa. :lulz:
The funniest thing, in retrospect, was the focus on performance over feeling. You know, because that's how the professionals do it :lulz:
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on July 02, 2014, 11:27:02 PM
In the early stages of my sex life I was too busy being ridden with anxiety about my performance to realize how hilarious sex is. I didn't start giggling over the absurdity of it until much, much later.
Absurd? I have no idea what you mean.
(https://scontent-a-pao.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/t1.0-9/10431494_10203049246484745_8451884719052560407_n.jpg)
Husband: You use too many towels
QGP: Because I have hair and it needs drying!
Husband: I have more surface area than you because I am taller. I only need one towel so you only need one.
QGP: That's not how anything works.
Husband: Don't you get your science in this.
QGP: I have lots of hair and you don't, and even without the hair you don't have much more surface area than me.
Husband: Are you calling my wife fat?
QGP: No, but that would make sense because I heard she sucks great dick.
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
:lol:
Not with me. It was more like, "Whoa... cool! I'm touching someone else's stuff/getting laid!" I didn't really think too much about the various acts involved, except to make sure that they were doing the intended thing for the other person.
Actually, that's an interesting question. Do you think such thoughts when you're the receiver? Like, if you're getting a BJ, are you thinking, "people put dicks in their mouths! That's so odd!"?
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
I did. It's hilarious to me now.
The first time I got laid I gave her 1st orgasm. It was a major ego boost to me at a young age, and it also involved me asking every few minutes is the stimulation good? I learned also to not feel like shit since some women don't get off with penetration from that experience, and I later I become a aggressive/ dominate dick during that relationship.
The hilarious part was I rarely got off from having sex with her.
Day 37
Jeff died last night. Rot got into his busted leg and with no water he just didn't have a chance. We moved him down toward the far end of the collapsed wall, opposite of the "latrine". It's the first time any of us have been grateful for the dark. Who wants to ignore a corpse while they're trying to take a shit. Not that there's much of that going on since the food ran out 2 days ago. Maybe Jeff was the lucky one. Barnaby has been babbling about using our helmets to collect mositure, none of us have the energy to tell him to shut his damned mouth. But oddly enough, the more he talks the more I get the feeling I could rise up, grab my pick ax and bury it in his skull. Then we would have some peace and...well, maybe something to eat. Am I losing it? Did I just write that? We can't eat Jeff, the rot. Please god, I hope they get us out of here.
:lulz:
Quote from: Alty on July 08, 2014, 06:43:03 PM
Day 37
Jeff died last night. Rot got into his busted leg and with no water he just didn't have a chance. We moved him down toward the far end of the collapsed wall, opposite of the "latrine". It's the first time any of us have been grateful for the dark. Who wants to ignore a corpse while you're trying to take a shit. Not that there's much of that going on since the food ran out 2 days ago. Maybe Jeff was the lucky one. Barnaby has been babbling about using our helmets to collect mositure, none of us have the energy to tell him to shut his damned mouth. But oddly enough, the more he talks the more I get the feeling I could rise up, grab my pick ax and bury it in his skull. Then we would have some peace and...well, maybe something to eat. Am I losing it? Did I just writr that? We can't eat Jeff, the rot. Please god, I hope they get us out of here.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: George Edger Dingleburry on July 08, 2014, 05:09:43 AM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
I did. It's hilarious to me now.
The first time I got laid I gave her 1st orgasm. It was a major ego boost to me at a young age, and it also involved me asking every few minutes is the stimulation good? I learned also to not feel like shit since some women don't get off with penetration from that experience, and I later I become a aggressive/ dominate dick during that relationship.
The hilarious part was I rarely got off from having sex with her.
That's trying too hard. Way I see it, you are there, (presumably) naked, about to engage in what is arguably one of the few things you can do in life that's pure pleasure. To spend the whole experience focusing on anything other than losing yourself in the passion of a moment more beautiful than anything else on this fleeting moment you have on the planet strikes me as "doing it wrong".
My sex life? i'll let you know when one happens. :sad:
Seriously, it seems like i've had everything up to but not including, full penetrative sex. I've even been told i'm pretty decent at the lead up: kissing, fondling all that good stuff, but someway or another, the actual sex part has never happened. It's like i'm stuck in a highly contrived romantic comedy. The part that really drives me up a wall is the fact that the parts i just mentioned are some of the most present i've been in my life. I have anxiety in almost every part of my life, but hanky panky seems to be the only state in which all those switches get shut off and i'm entirely focused on the activity at hand. For that brief moment, i'm not a quivering pile of insecurities, I am MAN, a primal by product of millions of monkeys successfully fucking in exactly this fashion. And then the director yells cut, the set shuts down, and i'm left with balls the exact shade of the ocean.
(http://i.imgur.com/1rFzmFx.jpg) sweet dreams.
Quote from: Alty on June 21, 2014, 11:02:33 PM
Wait, I meant to say:
I AM A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.
Could you ever see yourself as a transsexual tyrannosaurus?
Quote from: Pope Lecherous on July 12, 2014, 09:20:58 AM
Quote from: Alty on June 21, 2014, 11:02:33 PM
Wait, I meant to say:
I AM A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.
Could you ever see yourself as a transsexual tyrannosaurus?
I don't know if you write, and I don't care, that there is legitimate :lulz:
Quote from: LuciferX on July 12, 2014, 09:33:13 AM
Quote from: Pope Lecherous on July 12, 2014, 09:20:58 AM
Quote from: Alty on June 21, 2014, 11:02:33 PM
Wait, I meant to say:
I AM A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.
Could you ever see yourself as a transsexual tyrannosaurus?
I don't know if you write, and I don't care, that there is legitimate :lulz:
Legitimate what?
Quote from: Raz Tech on July 12, 2014, 04:07:14 AM
Quote from: George Edger Dingleburry on July 08, 2014, 05:09:43 AM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
I did. It's hilarious to me now.
The first time I got laid I gave her 1st orgasm. It was a major ego boost to me at a young age, and it also involved me asking every few minutes is the stimulation good? I learned also to not feel like shit since some women don't get off with penetration from that experience, and I later I become a aggressive/ dominate dick during that relationship.
The hilarious part was I rarely got off from having sex with her.
That's trying too hard. Way I see it, you are there, (presumably) naked, about to engage in what is arguably one of the few things you can do in life that's pure pleasure. To spend the whole experience focusing on anything other than losing yourself in the passion of a moment more beautiful than anything else on this fleeting moment you have on the planet strikes me as "doing it wrong".
I was 16 god damn it. Be happy I didn't fart.
Quote from: Pope Lecherous on July 12, 2014, 09:38:02 AM
Quote from: LuciferX on July 12, 2014, 09:33:13 AM
Quote from: Pope Lecherous on July 12, 2014, 09:20:58 AM
Quote from: Alty on June 21, 2014, 11:02:33 PM
Wait, I meant to say:
I AM A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.
Could you ever see yourself as a transsexual tyrannosaurus?
I don't know if you write, and I don't care, that there is legitimate :lulz:
Legitimate what?
:lulz: = lulz = haha
Quote from: LuciferX on July 12, 2014, 11:47:27 PM
Quote from: Pope Lecherous on July 12, 2014, 09:38:02 AM
Quote from: LuciferX on July 12, 2014, 09:33:13 AM
Quote from: Pope Lecherous on July 12, 2014, 09:20:58 AM
Quote from: Alty on June 21, 2014, 11:02:33 PM
Wait, I meant to say:
I AM A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.
Could you ever see yourself as a transsexual tyrannosaurus?
I don't know if you write, and I don't care, that there is legitimate :lulz:
Legitimate what?
:lulz: = lulz = haha
Thanks for your Illumination
Quote from: Chelagoras The Lust-Driven Dickwolf on July 12, 2014, 07:04:52 AM
My sex life? i'll let you know when one happens. :sad:
Seriously, it seems like i've had everything up to but not including, full penetrative sex. I've even been told i'm pretty decent at the lead up: kissing, fondling all that good stuff, but someway or another, the actual sex part has never happened. It's like i'm stuck in a highly contrived romantic comedy. The part that really drives me up a wall is the fact that the parts i just mentioned are some of the most present i've been in my life. I have anxiety in almost every part of my life, but hanky panky seems to be the only state in which all those switches get shut off and i'm entirely focused on the activity at hand. For that brief moment, i'm not a quivering pile of insecurities, I am MAN, a primal by product of millions of monkeys successfully fucking in exactly this fashion. And then the director yells cut, the set shuts down, and i'm left with balls the exact shade of the ocean.
:lulz: :mittens:
That is hilarious!
Also, on a more serious note, enjoy what you get and don't worry too much.
"You wanna do something stupid?"
15 minutes later
"That was stupid. Why did we do that?"
(also BUMP)
LOL OK
So my building has a guest policy that also applies to staff, that means anyone I have staying, I have to sign in with my co-workers watching. They can only stay until a specified time in the evening and, because they're not DBS checked, I have to be with them at all times.
So...yeah. That's not happening.
Quote from: Raz Tech on July 12, 2014, 04:07:14 AM
Quote from: George Edger Dingleburry on July 08, 2014, 05:09:43 AM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
I did. It's hilarious to me now.
The first time I got laid I gave her 1st orgasm. It was a major ego boost to me at a young age, and it also involved me asking every few minutes is the stimulation good? I learned also to not feel like shit since some women don't get off with penetration from that experience, and I later I become a aggressive/ dominate dick during that relationship.
The hilarious part was I rarely got off from having sex with her.
That's trying too hard. Way I see it, you are there, (presumably) naked, about to engage in what is arguably one of the few things you can do in life that's pure pleasure. To spend the whole experience focusing on anything other than losing yourself in the passion of a moment more beautiful than anything else on this fleeting moment you have on the planet strikes me as "doing it wrong".
I can't get over how bad this advice is. I mean, it's pretty much the worst sexual advice to give anyone, ever. "Just focus on how good you feel, don't waste your time figuring out what feels good to your partner or what gets them off" is a recipe for a bad, bad, bad lover. Spending that extra awkward time in the beginning figuring out what makes the other person's motor tick is what makes the big payoff later, when you're both comfortable and know exactly how to get the other one off and can frolic unself-consciously together.
Just focusing on your own pleasure is a good way to ensure you never even have the chance to GET to that point with another person, because you are a shitty lay and won't be invited to a second go-round. But if your goal in life is a series of one-night stands, I guess it's a viable strategy.
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on July 18, 2015, 12:18:55 AM
Quote from: Raz Tech on July 12, 2014, 04:07:14 AM
Quote from: George Edger Dingleburry on July 08, 2014, 05:09:43 AM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on July 02, 2014, 11:14:06 PM
I have a question.
In the somewhat early stages of your sex lives, did any of you ever have a difficult time sexing because you were so overwhelmed by the absurdity of it all that you frequently broke into hysterical laughter? or found yourself thinking (possibly even out loud) things like "two of my fingers are in a vagina. people actually do this? this is ridiculous, like, what's up with the world"?
I'm going through that now.
I did. It's hilarious to me now.
The first time I got laid I gave her 1st orgasm. It was a major ego boost to me at a young age, and it also involved me asking every few minutes is the stimulation good? I learned also to not feel like shit since some women don't get off with penetration from that experience, and I later I become a aggressive/ dominate dick during that relationship.
The hilarious part was I rarely got off from having sex with her.
That's trying too hard. Way I see it, you are there, (presumably) naked, about to engage in what is arguably one of the few things you can do in life that's pure pleasure. To spend the whole experience focusing on anything other than losing yourself in the passion of a moment more beautiful than anything else on this fleeting moment you have on the planet strikes me as "doing it wrong".
I can't get over how bad this advice is. I mean, it's pretty much the worst sexual advice to give anyone, ever. "Just focus on how good you feel, don't waste your time figuring out what feels good to your partner or what gets them off" is a recipe for a bad, bad, bad lover. Spending that extra awkward time in the beginning figuring out what makes the other person's motor tick is what makes the big payoff later, when you're both comfortable and know exactly how to get the other one off and can frolic unself-consciously together.
Just focusing on your own pleasure is a good way to ensure you never even have the chance to GET to that point with another person, because you are a shitty lay and won't be invited to a second go-round. But if your goal in life is a series of one-night stands, I guess it's a viable strategy.
Raz Tech never struck me as a person who cares about other people.
Quote from: Reginald Ret on July 13, 2014, 10:51:03 AM
Quote from: Chelagoras The Lust-Driven Dickwolf on July 12, 2014, 07:04:52 AM
My sex life? i'll let you know when one happens. :sad:
Seriously, it seems like i've had everything up to but not including, full penetrative sex. I've even been told i'm pretty decent at the lead up: kissing, fondling all that good stuff, but someway or another, the actual sex part has never happened. It's like i'm stuck in a highly contrived romantic comedy. The part that really drives me up a wall is the fact that the parts i just mentioned are some of the most present i've been in my life. I have anxiety in almost every part of my life, but hanky panky seems to be the only state in which all those switches get shut off and i'm entirely focused on the activity at hand. For that brief moment, i'm not a quivering pile of insecurities, I am MAN, a primal by product of millions of monkeys successfully fucking in exactly this fashion. And then the director yells cut, the set shuts down, and i'm left with balls the exact shade of the ocean.
:lulz: :mittens:
That is hilarious!
Also, on a more serious note, enjoy what you get and don't worry too much.
Update on this: Same shit different year.
Quote from: Chelagoras The Boulder on July 18, 2015, 06:59:02 AM
Quote from: Reginald Ret on July 13, 2014, 10:51:03 AM
Quote from: Chelagoras The Lust-Driven Dickwolf on July 12, 2014, 07:04:52 AM
My sex life? i'll let you know when one happens. :sad:
Seriously, it seems like i've had everything up to but not including, full penetrative sex. I've even been told i'm pretty decent at the lead up: kissing, fondling all that good stuff, but someway or another, the actual sex part has never happened. It's like i'm stuck in a highly contrived romantic comedy. The part that really drives me up a wall is the fact that the parts i just mentioned are some of the most present i've been in my life. I have anxiety in almost every part of my life, but hanky panky seems to be the only state in which all those switches get shut off and i'm entirely focused on the activity at hand. For that brief moment, i'm not a quivering pile of insecurities, I am MAN, a primal by product of millions of monkeys successfully fucking in exactly this fashion. And then the director yells cut, the set shuts down, and i'm left with balls the exact shade of the ocean.
:lulz: :mittens:
That is hilarious!
Also, on a more serious note, enjoy what you get and don't worry too much.
Update on this: Same shit different year.
Record heat-wave and obsessively sexual tv commercials got teens on the rise, though population growth rate remains the same IN (http://in) July!
Oh do I have a story. If you've been following me you'd know recently I had a nice spell of self destructive hedonism. Bassically I met a guy on tinder who was having a party. I show up with a bottle of lube and a box of condoms. After the normal cordial greetings I loudly exclaim "which one of you faggets wants the first ride?". This was the start of a good night. Used almost all the condoms. My favorite part of the night was teaching this qt skinny Mexican how to suck dick. Id show it on him, then he'd copy it on me. Another good one was this really aggressive guy who only cared about himself. He'd pull my hair and yell at me to take it. So after he finished I grabbed his hair and pinned him down. Whispered in his ear "safe word is pinkie pie" then pounded him pretty well. He seemed to enjoy it, but not fully. Always nice to add in some exestential dread to the bed room. The rest where pretty normal starting out akward till I took the lead. There was even a girl. Asian one as well. Anyway, I was driving home with a buttplug in to keep me hard when I saw two shining lights on the side of the road. I slowed down and tried to swur e, but I still ended up cliping a deers front leg.
I am a man of opportunity, and well, zoo and furry is a thing so why not try it?
I pulled over, and began chasing the deer through a feild. A deer with a broken leg was easy to catch upto, but it was about to jump a ditch into a tree line, i didn't want to cause trouble in the neighborhood so I decided to tackle it. I pinned it underneath me and tried to hold it's front legs down while I unzipped my pants. My hold on the legs slipped when I was fumbling with my belt. The deer gave me a pretty good punch to the face. Needless to say, I got in one little fight and my mom got scared.. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AVbQo3IOC_A
I sincerely hate you.
Quote from: Meunster on July 18, 2015, 07:50:33 PM
Oh do I have a story. If you've been following me you'd know recently I had a nice spell of self destructive hedonism. Bassically I met a guy on tinder who was having a party. I show up with a bottle of lube and a box of condoms. After the normal cordial greetings I loudly exclaim "which one of you faggets wants the first ride?". This was the start of a good night. Used almost all the condoms. My favorite part of the night was teaching this qt skinny Mexican how to suck dick. Id show it on him, then he'd copy it on me. Another good one was this really aggressive guy who only cared about himself. He'd pull my hair and yell at me to take it. So after he finished I grabbed his hair and pinned him down. Whispered in his ear "safe word is pinkie pie" then pounded him pretty well. He seemed to enjoy it, but not fully. Always nice to add in some exestential dread to the bed room. The rest where pretty normal starting out akward till I took the lead. There was even a girl. Asian one as well. Anyway, I was driving home with a buttplug in to keep me hard when I saw two shining lights on the side of the road. I slowed down and tried to swur e, but I still ended up cliping a deers front leg.
I am a man of opportunity, and well, zoo and furry is a thing so why not try it?
I pulled over, and began chasing the deer through a feild. A deer with a broken leg was easy to catch upto, but it was about to jump a ditch into a tree line, i didn't want to cause trouble in the neighborhood so I decided to tackle it. I pinned it underneath me and tried to hold it's front legs down while I unzipped my pants. My hold on the legs slipped when I was fumbling with my belt. The deer gave me a pretty good punch to the face. Needless to say, I got in one little fight and my mom got scared.. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AVbQo3IOC_A
:lulz:
Quote from: Meunster on July 18, 2015, 07:50:33 PM
Oh do I have a story. If you've been following me you'd know recently I had a nice spell of self destructive hedonism. Bassically I met a guy on tinder who was having a party. I show up with a bottle of lube and a box of condoms. After the normal cordial greetings I loudly exclaim "which one of you faggets wants the first ride?". This was the start of a good night. Used almost all the condoms. My favorite part of the night was teaching this qt skinny Mexican how to suck dick. Id show it on him, then he'd copy it on me. Another good one was this really aggressive guy who only cared about himself. He'd pull my hair and yell at me to take it. So after he finished I grabbed his hair and pinned him down. Whispered in his ear "safe word is pinkie pie" then pounded him pretty well. He seemed to enjoy it, but not fully. Always nice to add in some exestential dread to the bed room. The rest where pretty normal starting out akward till I took the lead. There was even a girl. Asian one as well. Anyway, I was driving home with a buttplug in to keep me hard when I saw two shining lights on the side of the road. I slowed down and tried to swur e, but I still ended up cliping a deers front leg.
I am a man of opportunity, and well, zoo and furry is a thing so why not try it?
I pulled over, and began chasing the deer through a feild. A deer with a broken leg was easy to catch upto, but it was about to jump a ditch into a tree line, i didn't want to cause trouble in the neighborhood so I decided to tackle it. I pinned it underneath me and tried to hold it's front legs down while I unzipped my pants. My hold on the legs slipped when I was fumbling with my belt. The deer gave me a pretty good punch to the face. Needless to say, I got in one little fight and my mom got scared.. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AVbQo3IOC_A
They called that deer the Aristocrats.
Quote from: Meunster on July 18, 2015, 07:50:33 PM
Needless to say, I got in one little fight and my mom got scared.
:lol:
Quote from: Meunster on July 18, 2015, 07:50:33 PM
Oh do I have a story. If you've been following me you'd know recently I had a nice spell of self destructive hedonism. Bassically I met a guy on tinder who was having a party. I show up with a bottle of lube and a box of condoms. After the normal cordial greetings I loudly exclaim "which one of you faggets wants the first ride?". This was the start of a good night. Used almost all the condoms. My favorite part of the night was teaching this qt skinny Mexican how to suck dick. Id show it on him, then he'd copy it on me. Another good one was this really aggressive guy who only cared about himself. He'd pull my hair and yell at me to take it. So after he finished I grabbed his hair and pinned him down. Whispered in his ear "safe word is pinkie pie" then pounded him pretty well. He seemed to enjoy it, but not fully. Always nice to add in some exestential dread to the bed room. The rest where pretty normal starting out akward till I took the lead. There was even a girl. Asian one as well. Anyway, I was driving home with a buttplug in to keep me hard when I saw two shining lights on the side of the road. I slowed down and tried to swur e, but I still ended up cliping a deers front leg.
I am a man of opportunity, and well, zoo and furry is a thing so why not try it?
I pulled over, and began chasing the deer through a feild. A deer with a broken leg was easy to catch upto, but it was about to jump a ditch into a tree line, i didn't want to cause trouble in the neighborhood so I decided to tackle it. I pinned it underneath me and tried to hold it's front legs down while I unzipped my pants. My hold on the legs slipped when I was fumbling with my belt. The deer gave me a pretty good punch to the face. Needless to say, I got in one little fight and my mom got scared.. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AVbQo3IOC_A
So glad I stuck with this post. :lulz: