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1
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: December 30, 2021, 05:21:16 pm »
Iím doing the need-work-need-housing dance again
[...]
ďIím homeless on Jan 1st again, but I got a date coming upĒ

Update: I have housing for at least 6 months, and I'm working with professionals on getting employment.

With my name change almost completed (you'd get a kick out of the name I went with, Dok, I forget if I ever gave you the full up-to-date one), a wonderful woman I'm going to see again soon, doctors who care, having a place to go, improving my diet, two organizations and a friend helping me find work, on and on and on, I aim to be self-sufficient by year's end 2022 ... and I have both good motivation to aim that high and good reason to consider it doable.

2
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: December 12, 2021, 06:48:25 am »
If this lady doesn't kill me, nothing will. I'm driven, now.

3
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: December 12, 2021, 06:47:45 am »
Alive, and I had a date good enough that IF I am dating a serial killer I will regret not one goddamn thing.

I wore a SWEATER. Not a tacticool one, either: dad sweater, subtype brown-green-grey. And normal cargo pants, to boot. I say again: REGRET COUNT ZERO.

We cuddled and watched a Canadian in the Netherlands shit-talk American transportation infrastructure and urban planning. We lamented a lack of protests to start shit at. We watched her partner (she's poly) put together an Eldritch Horror-type Biblical Angel for a Christmas tree topper. I was introduced to her Nazi Crusher, a literal iron fist. Also her two cats, Enkidu and Gilgamesh. Bloodborne didn't happen because we forgot time passed and suddenly it's been six hours and I really need to be home. She told me to kiss her goodbye.

If I could ask for more, I don't have the language.

4
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: December 11, 2021, 02:37:57 pm »
By the way, has anyone heard from Altered/Nullified?

I'm beginning to worry a bit.

You should know better than that. Iím like bedbugs: what doesnít kill me turns me into a biblical plague.

Nah, but really, Iím actually doing mostly okay. Iím doing the need-work-need-housing dance again, but I have a wonderful lady Iím seeing later today so it isÖ really hard to care about my personal trouble.

Itís Bloodborne and Glenmorangie 10 yr tonight. Itís the second date.

At some point the story will need telling, because we met because A: I met Discordians visiting Chicago, B: I realized I liked not being a hermit, and C: I thought she was a scumfuck Nazi infiltrator.

I havenít been posting because Iím tired and old. Iím using diclofenac gel on my knees, really. I keep intending to post and clean forgetting, or else realizing that I have no valuable contributions.

ďIím homeless on Jan 1st again, but I got a date coming upĒ is like a minced oath minus the creative writing part, and now that Iím tethered to Chicago (I would die for this woman, I am goddamn well staying in transit range) what can anyone even do to save me anyway?

Sorry for the worry.

5
Apple Talk / Re: So I caught a 30 day ban on Facebook, again...
« on: November 29, 2021, 04:11:39 am »
Oh and yes for the record I do prefer making Trapt fans cry to making Kid Rock fans cry but after that dipshit faceplanted into getting owned by furries in public on twitter no one admits they like that shitty shitty fucking band, so I have to take my peabrained nu metal goober types where I can find them

6
Apple Talk / Re: So I caught a 30 day ban on Facebook, again...
« on: November 29, 2021, 04:07:24 am »
Participation trophies were EXCLUSIVELY a thing in the 90s or thereabouts, to my recollection. By the time I was in high school they had been phased out for a couple years and kids were already mocking the idea (it took a while for the adults to catch on).

Anyway Kid Rock hasn't been shit since Devil Without A Cause and even that album was bottom-of-the-barrel nu metal at the height of nu metal as the sellout genre du jour. He's not worth one teaspoon of my most generous shits, I just like to see his fans cry when I say Bawitdaba was a dogshit song from a dogshit album and it's STILL the highest achievement of that dogshit man's dogshit career

7
Apple Talk / Re: I'm not here.
« on: October 02, 2021, 06:45:11 am »
Yeah. I donít have much to add except that one day I hope to be able to say Iím not here either.

I can already see you moving.

If it's any encouragement, my life and my career didn't actually start for real until I was in my late 30s.  Things change.  You change.

Hey, remember this?

I made it. Iím not here.

Thanks for writing this. Itís given me, during some especially dark and awful times, a goal to aspire to. When everything else seems unrealistic or foolish, I have a fallback, a reason to keep moving. Not to go some place in particular, but to go anywhere but where I have been sitting all this time.

And I did it.

And you were right about the anger, too. I do in fact still have it, but itís ... remembering things that used to wreck my week, and giggling to myself about how mad those fuckers would be to see me now. If they could. Itís not spite or hate or a grudge anymore. Itís not seething or brooding. Itís knowing I won. I donít need to show them what anymore, I already showed myself.

Itís a good place to be, not here.

8
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: September 25, 2021, 05:45:00 pm »
Wait, you aren't real and this is a solipsistic hellhole? But that would mean...

Oh goddamn it. I'm the demiurge of the universe AGAIN??? This shit is getting OLD. Let me out of my own head, you pieces of shit!

9
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: August 26, 2021, 05:36:01 pm »
Yesterdya the doctor had to do a blood draw to get my levels because HRT needs that shit so you don't drown in your own hormones. Then i started listing a litany of incresingly terrible symptoms I had been having that seemed related to the anxiety meds i'm on, and she was like "hmmmmm.... anemia maybe? we'll just get you tested for everything under the damn sun!"

5 vials of blood later, im sent home

It's been16 hours and Im still woblly as fuck. I double-fuck half the attempts ti fix my typos i make so Ive given up. i nearly threw my laptop into a rian puddle and nearly fell down the long flight of stairs between first and 2nd floors already just this morning.  I ate a whole pizza, a salad, a sandwihc, a plate of pancakes and two bags of chips between blood draw and now, alog with a shitload of 711 generic sports drink gatorade substitute they got cucumcber mnit flavor shits excellent you should try it, here I am weak and limpy and all half leaned on one side anyway despie it all. Drunk without the alcohol

and now I'm like hmmmmmmmmmmmm...... anemia maybe??? MAYYYYYBE????

10
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: July 24, 2021, 09:41:32 pm »
Iím just waiting for the shit Iím struggling under to level off so I can bitch about not finding work and talk smack about the straight white guy thinking the disabled queers canít run a fucking co-op their lives depend on.

11
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: July 23, 2021, 06:13:48 pm »
to keep content fresh, I recommend we pick a theme and each post our answer. How about social security numbers to start!
Oh that sounds fun, Iíll start:
170-00-000-0000-00000-000000-0000000-00000000Ö

12
Apple Talk / Re: Last one to post in thread wins
« on: July 22, 2021, 01:04:44 am »
One day I'll post about The Mgt in here. Then you'll all be sorry. So will I, but it'll be for the greater good.

13
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: July 01, 2021, 11:33:34 pm »
Itís me. Sorry, I just ooze the scent of money despite not having any.

I donít know why itís like this, Iím walking to CVS to spend my last five dollars on some sleep meds and some freak in an ugly tweed suit comes up and starts spouting off about viagra pills. Some guy joins almost every Discord server Iím active in and pings me to ask about if I might be interested mayhaps in some Cryptographic Monetary Stuff. Strangers ringing our doorbell to ask if We, Poor People, would be interested in Expensive Giant Vases. It goes on.

If you feed them to the Nessies, I wonít be too sad. But make sure to keep the marketing material out of there; we donít want them getting ideas.

14
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Random News Stories
« on: June 30, 2021, 09:08:20 pm »
I hope someone is maintaining a publicly accessible list.

15
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Curbside Pickup Only
« on: June 30, 2021, 03:47:24 pm »
Creative geniuses are fungible.

The internet has brought in a golden age of access to, and ability to discover, new media. There is no shortage of talented people producing high-quality entertainment.  Sure, you won't find writers like Ellis hanging out in every coffeeshop, but he doesn't have a monopoly, or anything.  You don't feel like supporting one writer, for whatever reason, you can find another.


...I've been toying the above theory for a while, now, but I don't know if I actually believe it.  Could you replace a Gen Urobuchi, or a Yoko Kanno?  My gut says no.

And I knew Ellis was an asshole, but I watched season 4 of Castlevania anyway.

I've found that the only truly irreplaceable artists are ones I don't have any problem with.

I wouldn't call artistic talent or vision fungible, but it's certainly less than irreplaceable. Enough people will rip off the shit anyone worth a good goddamn is doing that over a decade or so, you'll be able to find your own hyper-specific flavor of whatever it is. It will never quite be the same, but you can tailor your media consumption so specifically to you that it's somehow better this way. Usually, if they're worth ripping off, they can be improved upon, and eventually will be improved upon. So you give up familiarity for basically a higher quality remix of the same style that happens to hit every satsifying note involved.

I should note this only works if you're willing to give up TV and big budget Hollywood films. Those have quite short lists of all people involved and alive at any given point in time, so if one bad person is on TV or in a big name film, it will likely fuck up a half dozen other things too. However, like videogame development, TV and film are collaborative mediums, so you can just tell yourself they didn't do anything important. (I avoid auteurs, they're freaks and weirdos and kind of gross. The two exceptions to my rule of avoidance are kind of weird and gross, even, and not even in ways I like.)

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