There's one hand behind everything
pulling the strings
some call him the devil
and some call him god
the lord is my shepherd
he maketh me consumer goods and an appetite for consumtion
the devil takes them back again
and teaches me to hate
the greatest creation that god ever pulled was duality
convincing us there's two of him
and only one deserves to rule
the lord is my shepherd
he leadeth me to slaughter
he giveth me weapons
to fight against the weapons he gave to mine enemies
he tells me they are evil
as I was accused unto them
we both of us, my enemy and me
paid dearly for those weapons
to fight for our freedom
to pay the ultimate price
The lord got both cheques
along with two sets of conflicting gratitude
I am promised a great life
in exchange for the one I have now
If I'm still around after I die then I can collect
If I shop around I can get a better deal
like 50 free virgins when I get there
but that's patently ridiculous and besides
the people who promise this are quite obviously evil
I mean they carry weapons!
which reminds me, I need another assualt rifle to protect myself from those lunatics
I'd better see the lord about that!
Hah, I like the ending especially.
nice one, p3nt4
Loved it, and for your random lulz I heard a rumour that the 'virgins' promised in the afterlife may actually be an inspired mis-translation of 'sun-dried grapes' (aka, raisins). Havnt had time to check the truth of it though
Quote from: Oedipus complex on March 01, 2008, 10:52:16 PMI heard a rumour that the 'virgins' promised in the afterlife may actually be an inspired mis-translation of 'sun-dried grapes' (aka, raisins). Havnt had time to check the truth of it though
Quite literally spat coffee through my nose.
The ultimate:
**Terms and conditions subject to change without notice.Man, they're gonna be SO pissed.
~ Poke Fing Feng III
Quote from: Oedipus complex on March 01, 2008, 10:52:16 PM
Loved it, and for your random lulz I heard a rumour that the 'virgins' promised in the afterlife may actually be an inspired mis-translation of 'sun-dried grapes' (aka, raisins). Havnt had time to check the truth of it though
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Quote from: Oedipus complex on March 01, 2008, 10:52:16 PM
Loved it, and for your random lulz I heard a rumour that the 'virgins' promised in the afterlife may actually be an inspired mis-translation of 'sun-dried grapes' (aka, raisins). Havnt had time to check the truth of it though
There really are virgins, big straping southern farm boys the lot of them.